Peace, Sweet Peace!

Peace, Sweet Peace!

By

Charles Haynes

         Frankie is one of my best buddies. He taught me how to spit. I can’t spit as good as he can, though. I’m still practicin’. 

         Frankie has two younger brothers named Kenneth and Paul Mike. I know Kenneth because he lives in Frankie’s room, too. But I hardly ever saw their kid brother until we all went to the beach together. Frankie’s mama talked to my mama and my mama said it was okay for me to go. 

         Frankie’s daddy, Mr. Henry, spread out a bale of hay for us in the back of his pick-up truck. The truck had wooden boards for sides and a wooden top. Frankie’s daddy built it himself. Mrs. Henry spread a big blanket over the hay and that’s where me and Frankie and Kenneth rode. 

         It was a lot of fun until Paul Mike talked his mama into letting him get in the back, too. That’s where she made a terrible mistake! Any mama ought to know that little kids don’t belong with big kids. Little kids are too much trouble!

         Mrs. Henry, Frankie’s mom had been acting real funny lately. She was much more quiet than usual. Frankie said she hadn’t been yellin’ at him and Kenneth as much. I asked Frankie what was wrong with her. He said she had peace. I asked him what that was supposed to mean. 

         Frankie said their Pastor, Preacher Mulvaney, said that people worry too much. Preacher Mulvaney said that church people shouldn’t worry. He said they should have the peace of God. ‘Specially the ones that’s been sanctified.  Pastor Mulvaney said he wanted everyone to try and go for at least one whole day without worrying.

         I thought, “Heck, what’s the big deal! Me and Frankie don’t ever worry!” Unless you consider the time I cut Frankie’s hair! I did start to worry a little about that. I thought it looked pretty good. Turns our Mrs. Henry didn’t think so. I told her I could straighten it up if she would just tell me how she wanted it cut. 

         Sometimes she does this thing where her face turns red and she starts breathin’ kinda loud and making this mumblin’ sound. At church, I think they call it “speaking in tongues”.

         I told her it would grow back out and she could have it cut any way she wanted. It was the middle of summer and I pointed out that my ol’ buddy Frankie would be a lot cooler. I also pointed out that probably all the other kids would want theirs cut the same way. 

         “Hey”, I told Frankie, “We could make a lot of money cuttin’ the other kids’ hair”!

         For some reason, Mrs. Henry’s face started gettin’ even redder! Probably had somethin’ to do with the fact that she was ‘speaking in tongues’ louder and louder.

         I’ve found out many times that it’s hard to talk sense into some people. “Specially adults!

         I told my daddy that one time and he wanted to know just what it was that I thought some little kid needed to explain to him. All of a sudden, things just weren’t going the way I wanted them to. I could feel my throat getting’ dry and startin’ to swell up. 

         I told daddy he didn’t understand what I meant. He asked me if I thought that was because he was too dumb to understand. Now I know why my daddy cusses so much! Seems like it would come in handy right about now.

         I said, “Daddy, you are the smartest man I know! And, anyone who works like you do and can shoot pool like you can…” 

         This is where I started prayin’ and fastin’. I crossed myself like I saw somebody do on TV, and three times, real quick, I said, “Lord, help me Jesus!  Lord, help me Jesus!  Lord, help me Jesus!” Oh! And, I almost forgot to say that my life passed before me and I thought I was going to wet myself!

         “Oh, yeah, Daddy! You married mama! Mama said that was the smartest thing you ever did!" Pretty sure I was worryin’ a little bit this time, too!

         Daddy sat there for a minute as if he was tryin’ to come up with somethin’ real good to say. Everbody knows that he is real good at comin’ up with smart things to say. Then he said, “We’ll talk later.” And, he got up and went in the other room where mama was. A little later it sounded like him and mama was laughin’ at somethin’, which was fine with me. 

         I thought, “Wow! The Lord has answered my prayers!" Kinda glad I didn’t start cussin’! Maybe it’ll help if I learn how to ‘speak in tongues’! 

         Anyway, the Preacher said that they should try to keep from worrying, I guess like me and Frankie, most of the time.  I figured for sure that we could help Frankie’s mom. ‘Specially since we was so good at it!

         Frankie’s mama said she knew she could do it, just like the preacher said. She said it was easier now that she was sanctified. When I asked Frankie how his mama got sanctified, he said you have to listen to a lot of sermons, read your Bible and pray. He said people that have been sanctified don’t cuss or chew tobacco. She must not have been sanctified the other week when Paul Mike slammed her finger in the car door. Maybe it comes and goes. Kinda like a fever!

         Frankie’s mom said she knew she could have peace and keep from worryin’ for twenty-four hours. No problem. She said a nice pleasant ride to the beach sounded like “just what the doctor ordered”.

         So, we stopped about halfway to the beach and Frankie’s mom got out and tossed the kid in the back. Only one of us was happy about that. Me and Frankie and Kenneth was told to “entertain” the kid. Seems to me if you had peace and all, you at least ought to be able to put up with your own kid.

      Paul Mike was always in the way. He was annoying and he wouldn’t shut up. He wanted to play like little kids do and we wanted to talk about important stuff, like baseball or snakes. 

         The kid wanted our comic books. He found the candy we had hid in the hay. Then he started throwin’ the hay up in the air.    

         Me and Frankie and Kenneth were pullin’ the hay out of our hair when Kenneth came up with a great idea. Kenneth can really think good. Frankie knows how to do stuff like ride a bike or hit a baseball. But Kenneth, good ol’ Kenneth, now he can really figure out stuff. He turned to Frankie and yelled, “Let’s pull his pants off!” I think Kenneth might be a scientist someday. 

         Seems Frankie musta liked the idea ‘cause he grabbed Paul Mike the next time he ran by. 

         Before I knew it, Frankie and Kenneth were wrasslin’ with Paul Mike and he was kickin’ and screamin’. Paul Mike’s mama didn’t pay it any attention ‘cause the old truck was noisy and Paul Mike’s screamin’, when he was upset, sounded just like when he was havin’ fun. 

         By this time, Frankie was half on top of Paul Mike, holdin’ him down on his stomach, while Kenneth was pullin’ Paul Mike’s pants off. Turns out Frankie and Kenneth work real good together. 

         It didn’t seem like the right thing to do, so, I tried not to help. Then I remembered how Mrs. Franklin, our Sunday School teacher taught us that we needed to help one another.  And, I mighta helped a little bit after that.

         Me and Frankie and Kenneth had been drawin’ and practicing our writin’, cause Frankie’s mama had give us some paper and different colored pens before we left home. 

         As soon as Kenneth got Paul Mike’s underwear off, him and Frankie started writin’ and drawin’ on his butt. You know, I think Kenneth will probably be an artist someday, but, I don’t know why his drawins on Paul Mike’s butt was so much better than what he did on regular paper. Specially, since the truck was bouncin’ around and the kid was still kickin’ and screamin’.

         Anyway, Kenneth had only drawn an elephant and part of a cowboy gun when the truck came to a sudden stop. “What now?” Frankie had only had time to write part of his name. Seems he was on the “k”. Here comes Mrs. Henry around to the back of the truck, lettin’ down the tailgate.

         I can’t understand mamas. She was the one who put the kid in the back. Looks to me like whatever happens is her fault. When she stopped screamin’ and yellin’ at Frankie and Kenneth, I asked her if she was still sanctified. 

         Later, after thinkin’ about it, that probably wasn’t the best thing to say. She just stood there, starin’ at me. Her eyes got real big and I could tell one of ‘em was startin’ to twitch. I thought about the demon possessed man we had just heard about in Sunday School, but I figured it would be better not to say anything about that. I figured that she might be thinkin’ about how to explain to my mama what she was about to do to me.

         I told their mama that I didn’t think that I had anything to do with whatever she was upset about. But, that sometimes I had been known to do things that was real hard for me to remember. “We had several drunks in the family”, I told her, “and it was probably ‘cause of them”. They had trouble rememberin’ stuff, too. 

         I didn’t want Frankie and Kenneth to be in trouble, so, I pointed out how good their drawin’ and writin’ was. This didn’t seem to help.  Their mama had started to drool out one corner of her mouth and she mighta been about to cry. She threw Paul Mike’s drawers back into the back of the truck, slammed the tailgate shut, and walked slowly back to the front while makin’ a sorta whimperin’ sound. I asked Frankie if she was speaking in tongues. He said he didn’t think so ‘cause he didn’t think she was in the spirit.

         After we got to the beach, for some reason, Frankie’s dad came around and let us out of the truck. His mama just stayed in the front, sittin’ real still like. 

         Me and daddy watched this movie one time where a woman was real still for a long time. Daddy said it was because she was havin’ a coma. I told Frankie that maybe his mama was havin’ a coma.

         Later, she fixed hotdogs and Frankie’s dad brought ‘em to us outside. Boy, they looked good! Then, I remembered why the woman in the movie was havin’ a coma! I decided I wasn’t hungry!