Where's My Stimulus Check?

The economy is in a rut right now and many Americans are feeling the true effect of  the Corona virus. Shhh…we’re not allowed to talk about it among ourselves as average citizens, like it’s just going to cure and heal us on its own. We’ll just allow the media to control our minds, especially what we need or don’t need to know.

You know, you know, you know without communication your relationship with your spouse, lover, children, grandparents, co-workers, “mailman”, accountant and in some cases your pet. I gather by now you know what I’m saying is the fact that the world has always gone through mass changes and difficult times.

Let’s go back in history after the ice age. Researchers have found unmistakable signs of just how tough life really was for the people who lived there after the Ice Age. There is clear evidence that the settlement was washed away by a major storm, but the settlers returned to the site and rebuilt their lives.

The reason why I can reflect upon hard times is the fact that I live in a country that does help its citizens through a crisis. As part of the CARES Act, the $2.2 trillion stimulus package, the federal government is sending stimulus checks (also known as Economic Impact Payments) to millions of Americans. So I sit with anticipation waiting on my Stimulus Check. Most countries do not look out for their citizens even the hate and militia groups, like the United States of America.

The outbreak of the Great Depression in the fall of 1929 caused much economic hardship. Widespread unemployment during the 1930s exacerbated an already difficult situation by forcing the government to spend millions of dollars on various relief programs. Most, however, were ineffective. Then someone in government came up with the bright idea of Dole rations. The dole was a small amount of support the government distributed to the poor and unemployed. A typical ration included flour, pork, split peas, corn meal, molasses and cocoa. What were them people supposed to do with cocoa unless it came in leaves form I’m thinking. People used coca leaves to relieve hunger and fatigue, to enhance physical performance and for asthma, altitude sickness and other conditions, but there is no good scientific evidence to support the real uses of cocoa.  The relief provided for only about half of a person’s nutritional needs. The government did not give more partly because it had very little money to spare during the Depression; by 1933 it was already spending more than $1 million on relief payments annually. President Franklin Roosevelt had a plan to relieve the effects of the Great Depression as he took office in 1933. He helped devise a set of government projects and social programs known as the New Deal. Roosevelt soothed anxious Americans with "fireside chats" urging them to leave their money in the banks, which helped stabilize the economy.

I hope President Trump somehow gets his greedy paws on this short story. I know how much he cares about our financial situation with him only having a net worth of 3.1 billion dollars and approximately 500 business entities. Sorry to bring that up, but for a minute I truly believed he was going to reject or veto us getting a stimulus check.

Do you remember the energy crisis of the 1970s? I can clearly recall my father telling me how long he had to wait at the gas station to get the allotted amount of gas per car. The family had two cars at the time. All the fights and sometimes killings just like how people act on Black Friday at Walmart’s and other giant stores. The world has always been in some kind of crisis. Now we’ll never, ever know who or why they’re caused. Here is a list of suggestions the government passed out to the American people to resolve the Energy Crisis in the 1970s.

1.    Use less energy.

2.    Improve energy infrastructure.

3.    Save energy where possible.

4.    Rely less on fossil fuels.

5.    Switch to renewable energy.

6.    Go vegan – vegan foods are less energy intensive to produce.

7.    Fly less.

8.    Drive less.

9.    Take public transport.

10. Campaign to improve awareness of the energy crisis.

11. Educate others about the energy crisis.

12. Install energy-efficient appliances in the home.

13. Save water.

14. Do not waste food.

15. Insulate your property.

16. When I attended college in the 90’s I do believe someone mentioned changing to day light savings time to save energy. I think I did a paper on the subject and the SLA (Symbionese Liberation Army) involving an alleged kidnapped Patty Hearst.

The Great Recession of 2008 to 2009. The U.S. Response. In the United States, the government followed a two-pronged strategy to reverse the financial crisis: bail out distressed financial institutions (lest they transmit their failure to their creditors) and pump government money into the economy (to stimulate business activity when private loans were scarce). What emerged from the bailout was an extraordinary degree of government involvement in and sometimes even majority ownership of in the private sector. Altogether, the government by late 2009 had provided an estimated $4 trillion to keep the financial sector afloat. Congress handed newly elected President Barack Obama the first legislative triumph of his month-old presidency when it enacted a $787 billion fiscal stimulus bill that comprised $288 billion in tax cuts and $499 billion in spending, most of it for public-works programs such as school construction and highway repair. Although Republicans groused that checks for much of the $499 billion. The bill would create or preserve 3.5 million jobs.

It's been 3 months now and I know that the mailman and my feet are sick and tired of news about that check not showing up in my mailbox in which is about 100 yards from my apartment complex or 820 steps round trip. I just need a few dollars to keep my one man lawn service business afloat. My customers are not too worried about how high their grass grows or how wild the bushes and garden looks.

This Corona virus is real in many ways. I know many of us will survive this crisis as we have in the past. In away the virus is allowing us to learn more about ourselves and how to truly get along.

I am aware of the civil unrest we as a nation are experiencing. As history has demonstrated to us time and time again. Strong leadership is needed. I’m truly not sure we have it today. Hey, who knows it just might take a new president to make that change? That was just a thought. Nothing more, nothing less.

I had gotten on that poor over worked mailman nerves so bad that, the day that my stimulus letter arrived he actually knocked on my apartment door and handed the letter to me personally. Then he told me in a non-civilian impolite way to never address him again, unless I truly wanted to know what going “postal” meant.

I could hardly wait to find out when I’ll be receiving my Stimulus Check. When I started reading the contents of the letter. I felt a sharp pain shooting across my heart. It read: If you see the message "Payment Status Not Available" and you do belong to the group below, it may be you aren't eligible to receive a stimulus check. It might be that your adjusted gross income from the previous year is high enough that you don't qualify, or you might be in the specific age range that is excluded.

I’m now reading with sweaty and shaky hands. My dog is barking crazily and even chasing his tail for some strange reason. The mailman left 8 minutes ago. I hushed him and continued reading. Dear, Non Recipient: while most individuals will get a stimulus payment provided by the CARES Act (those $1,200 maximum checks you’ve been hearing about), don’t be surprised when you find yourself without receiving one.

Here are five reasons why you’re not getting a stimulus payment: 1. Mr. Cucumber your adjusted gross income was too high. 2. Mr. H. Cucumber you’re unemployed now, but your previous tax returns make you ineligible. Now I’m thinking that I should have voted for Hillary Clinton. 3. Mr. Harold Cucumber you missed the deadline to update your bank account information. Again, I’m thinking this personal letter is addressing me quite personal wouldn’t you agree? I quickly scanned to the end of the letter and discovered that the signature was written in ink by the president himself  4. Mr. Harold J. Cucumber you have an outstanding defaulted of a student loan of over $92,000 way overdue.

The letter suddenly slipped from my disappointing hands. I was so upset that I found comfort in a bottle of Old Granddad whiskey. About 12 sips from the bottle I had the courage to read number 5 why I wasn’t going to receive a stimulus check. 5. Mr. Harold Jacob Cucumber Sr. This government will never, ever give you a stimulus check because past due debt including child support, bank debts and private debt collections.

 In the morning when I awoke with a hangover and my apartment looking as if it was hit by a hurricane. I relegalized or realized then and there it would be fruitless to blame my denial of my stimulus check on the government. But as soon as that mailman drives past my 3 bedroom apartment I’d let my 172 pound rottweiler dog Killer out. In which by the way he despises and hates mailmen or mail women no matter what race.