Fairly Twisted Tales

TW: contains mentions of physical abuse

The dimly lit set is of a side of a tunnel that is a mix of purples and earthy browns, it is littered with pages from books, some ripped, some crumpled, both big and small. The biggest page, that is visible to the audience, says ‘Once upon a time…’. Stage left stands a Man in dark green smoking a large cigar and looking particularly bored. 

Sound effect of book pages being riffled. Enter Girl stage right. She slowly walks to centre stage exploring the tunnel.

Girl: Where am I? (rubs head) I must have bumped my head, or did I fall down some sort of rabbit hole?

Man: Perhaps. If you want to think about it like that. (releases a cloud of smoke from his mouth)

Girl: (jumps, startled by the Man) Sorry, I didn’t see you, it’s quite dark here. Where is here?

Man: (in a bored tone) Hubbook.

Girl: And how do I get out of Hubbook?

Man: Follow the story.

Girl: (repeating) Follow the… what?

Man: (pointedly) Follow the story. (sighs) Continue along the tunnel, (indicates off stage left) when you get to the end, the story will show you the way.

Girl: The story will?

Man: Yes. Now, get a move on. (herds the Girl off stage)

Girl: But… 

Exit Girl stage right. Stage goes black. When the lights come back on, the set is of steps leading up to a palace backdrop. A Woman in a pale blue ball gown stands stage right, readying herself to enter palace.

Sound effect of a page turning. Enter Girl stage left. Girl is awestruck by the beautiful palace in front of her.

Woman: (to herself) I’ve got until midnight, I can do this.

Girl: (notices the Woman and approaches) Excuse me, can you tell me where I am? I was in Hubbook but-

Woman: (points to palace) You’re outside the Prince’s palace, (under her breath, sarcastically) obviously.

Girl: Which Prince?

Woman: Which Prince? THE Prince! 

Girl: Who?

Woman: Prince Charming! (rolls her eyes)

Girl: Oh! Then, you must be Cinderella.

Woman: (pauses, side-eyes the Girl) No-one’s called me that in years. Everyone calls me Ella. How do you know that name?

Girl: From a story.

Woman: Story? What story?

Girl: Your story. ‘Cinderella’.

Woman: What happens in my story?

Girl: You marry the Prince.

Woman: Ha! Marry the Prince. (shakes her head indignantly) I already have a love, and the Prince stole her from me, along with my throne!

Girl: (opens her mouth to respond but is taken aback)

Woman: Whoever your ‘Cinderella’ is, she's weak for marrying him.

Girl: What are you going to do, then?

Woman: I’m going to kill him, and take back what’s mine. (hurries upstairs, hitching her dress up slightly to reveal a dagger strapped to her leg)

Girl: (calling after Woman) But that’s not how the story goes… Wait! (begins running up the stairs following the Woman)

Woman exits back stage right. Girl freezes on the stairs. Stage goes black. When the lights come back on there is a table at front centre stage with a Boy lying on it, not moving. There is a spotlight on him. Sound effect of a page turning.

Girl turns around and slowly makes her way down the steps, taking in the bare room.

Girl: Where am I now? This place is so confusing. (sees Boy and approaches) Hello? Is he alive? (raises a hand above the Boy’s mouth and nose) He’s barely breathing! (turns to the empty room) Help! Help! Somebo- (slowly turns back to Boy) He’s asleep. (pauses) Sleeping… Beauty? Well, he is beautiful. Dark, velvety hair, perfectly straight eyebrows, how is that possible? And his eyelashes are amazingly long. (sighs longingly) His eyes must be beautiful too, perhaps they’re a dark brown colour? (draws closer to the Boy) His skin looks incredibly soft, and high cheekbones, every girl’s weakness. His lips… (moves closer again) small but plump, similar to the shape of a heart… needing a kiss. (leans down to kiss him but stops herself) Wait. (stands up straight again) I’m not his princess, I should leave him for her. Unless, (dreamy voice) I’ve been placed here to wake him up… (leans down to kiss him again)

Soldier enters back stage right.

Soldier: NO! (reaches his hand out to the Girl)

Girl: (quickly lifts her head)

Soldier: (rushes towards the Girl) Miss, move away from him please.

Girl: Why?

Soldier: Miss, please! (places an arm between the Girl and the Boy)

Girl: (steps away from the Boy) 

Soldier: (drops arm, looking relieved) Thank you. Did you touch him? 

Girl: No, why?

Soldier: He’s not safe.

Girl: Because he’s under a spell?

Soldier: No, you are.

Girl: (offended) What? No, I’m not! 

Soldier: You are. Just like all young girls who get too close to him. He lures you in with his entrancing beauty. Once you kiss him… well, if he doesn’t kill you immediately, the madness soon will. Those who have only touched him have become physically deformed. 

Girl: (steps further away from the Boy, eyes wide)

Soldier: You must be strong to have resisted him this long. Come away now (leads Girl up the stairs and offstage back right)

Stage goes black. When the lights come back on, the set is of a bedroom with spotted wallpaper. There are three different size beds, in the smallest is a girl with blonde, curly hair, asleep. She has a blue, swollen eye and a few cuts on her face. Sound effect of a page turning. Enter Girl stage right.

Girl: (sigh) Not again. This is starting to get weird. I just want to go home. (notices the blonde girl in bed, then counts the beds) Goldilocks? This is a bit different from Cinderella and Sleeping Beauty, but I guess they were different themselves. (notices the bruising on Goldilocks’ face) This isn’t right.

Enter the Three Bears stage left. They each approach their own bed in turn.

Daddy Bear: Someone’s been sleeping in my bed.

Mummy Bear: Someone’s been sleeping in my bed too.

Baby Bear: Someone’s been sleeping in my bed, and they’re still there!

Daddy Bear: (turns and sees the Girl) Who are you?

Girl: Ignore me, continue with the story. (waves a hand at them to continue and sits down on a chair, stage right)

Mummy Bear gently shakes Goldilocks awake. Goldilocks immediately shrinks away from her and pulls the blanket over her head.

Mummy Bear: Shh, it’s okay. We’re not going to hurt you.

Goldilocks: (peeps her head from beneath the blanket) You’re not?

Mummy Bear: No, sweetheart. (pauses) What happened to your face?

Goldilocks: (timid voice) My - my parents… it hurt too much, so I ran away. (begins sobbing)

Mummy Bear: (pulls Goldilocks into a hug. Goldilocks is nervous at first then accepts the hug)

Girl: I knew she wasn’t just a selfish, little girl!

The Three Bears turn and glare at the Girl. Girl motions zipping her lips. The Three Bears turn back to Goldilocks.

Daddy Bear: Was it you who ate the porridge downstairs?

Goldilocks: (nods)

Daddy Bear: Would you like some more? (guides Goldilocks offstage left, followed by Baby Bear)

Girl: (rising from chair) Will she be okay?

Mummy Bear: Yes, we’ll look after her now, no-one will hurt her. 

Exit Mummy Bear stage left. Stage goes black. When the lights come on again, the set is of the tunnel from the beginning, however the largest page now reads: ‘And they lived…’. On stage left is the Man in green, still smoking. Sound effect of a page turning.  Girl checks her surroundings.

Girl: The rabbit hole. Am I near the end of my journey?

Man: Almost. What happens at the end of a story?

Girl: They lived happily ever after?

Man: Not always. (releases a big cloud of smoke from his mouth)

Girl: A moral?

Man: (cocks head and continues smoking)

Girl: (tilts head towards ceiling to think) Well, firstly, Cinderella, or Ella, ran off to kill the Prince as he’d stolen her love and her throne. She decided to act, not submit, as she knew she was in the right, albeit a drastic act. Sleeping Beauty, who is actually a boy, lured young girls to their demise with his looks. You have to be strong to resist him. (pauses) You shouldn’t fall for someone purely for their appearance? And Goldilocks… hmm… she was abused by her parents, ran away from home and entered a stranger’s house, probably not someone to learn from. Maybe the Bears...? (pauses) Always be... accepting and helpful... to those who need assistance or support, reach out to those in need?

A rustling of pages swells but quickly falters. Man puffs out rings of smoke.

Girl: Did it not work? Am I missing something? (turns to Man)

Man shrugs in a knowing way. Girl turns away from the Man and paces. Man continues his smoke, disinterested.

Girl: Cin- Ella kills the Prince rather than marrying him, Sleeping Beauty lures young girls to kill them, rather than a young girl cursed to sleep eternally, and Goldilocks had cause for breaking into the Bears’ home, not for selfish reasons like I’d assumed. (pauses pacing and turns to Man again) I’d assumed. I’d assumed I knew these stories, but I’d only been taught one narrative. I’d judged them from what I knew and should have waited until I understood the truth, their story. (facepalms, groans softly and turns to the tunnel) Never judge a book by its cover.

A rustling of pages swells again and a spotlight appears near offstage right. Girl notices, then turns to Man expectantly.

Man: Your home awaits.

Girl: (smiling) Thank you!

Man: (to himself, sarcastically) Don’t let the book hit you on your way out.

Girl exits stage right. Stage goes black. Sound effect of a book snapping shut.