Memories

A heavy silence drifted in the air and the scene felt like it was part of an old time movie, the ones that are in black and white and silent as a mouse. Jack glanced at Peter, who sat across the table. The boy's eyes were downcast, and he moved his fork around his plate, which was piled high with spaghetti. It had been an hour and he hadn't eaten a single bite.

Jack glanced at the empty wooden chair next to Peter. Lila should've been sitting there. An arrow splintered Jack's heart and crystal tears welled in his eyes. She should've been sitting there. The statement was as gut wrenching as the memories. Lila should've been in that chair, Peter's arm wrapped around her. She should've been laughing at Jack when he did something utterly stupid, like spilling his glass of water all over the front of his pants. She should've been lying on the couch, sleeping peacefully as Peter pulled a blanket over her, kissed her forehead, and whispered the words I love you into her ear.

A single tear fell from Jack's pale face, he wiped it away with a quick swipe of his hand. She shouldn't have died. What had she done in life that was so awful that the angel of death had decided to take her from this world? She shouldn't have died and that was the honest truth.

"Do you miss her?" Jack flinched at the trembling sound of Peter's voice. He looked up. Peter's eyes focused on his plate, but his teeth pierced his lower lip.

Yeah. It's...it's just not right. She should've been here." Jack watched tears silently drip down Peter's face, splattering on the wooden table.

"Bloody hell, I know. Don't remind me." More tears leaked from Peter's now closed eyes. The room returned to its terrible, memory prying silence. Jack stared at his plate, not sure what to say. Jack missed Lila more than anyone could possibly imagine. But Peter, he missed her more.

More memories. Jack remembered being in the room when Lila had died, how Peter had held her in his arms. Peter had been the one to watch her eyes sparkle for the last time. He had been the one to feel her body go limp. He had been the one to hear her last, rasping breath. Peter had been the one who had fallen the hardest for Lila. It was easy to tell. His eyes lit up each time she would walk into the room, he smiled each time she laughed.

A fat lump formed in Jack's throat, choking him. Never fall in love, for everything that falls, breaks. The sentence was some kind of quote Jack had seen, probably on a bus bench. He had never thought much of it until now. Peter and Lila's relationship had been a glass vase at the edge of a wobbling table. It had fallen, and it had shattered into a million pieces on the floor.

"So ummm... What should we do tomorrow?" Jack attempted to break the torturous silence.

"Why does it matter? Nothing we do will be the same. Not without her." Peter snapped, his voice shrank at his last sentence.

"You don't know tha-"

"Yes, I do!" Peter threw his fist against the table, sending a loud crack through the room. Jack flinched. "It's not the bloody same without her and you know it. It just...it just doesn't feel right to do things without her." Peter's body shook as he melted back into his chair.

"Peter I-"

"Stop. Don't bloody apologize. I know...I'm a mess. But I can't do this without her. I just can't." Peter's head fell into his hands, which were trembling.

Another memory replayed in Jack's dull mind. Lila's funeral. Of course, it had been like no other, which was just the way Lila had wanted it. Everyone had worn purple, her favorite color. Jack, in a lavender suit, Peter in dark purple. How they had watched her casket closed shut, never to be opened. It had been so terrible. It was like they were watching her die all over again. Jack remembered the sound of the violins cry their songs as Lila's casket disappeared into the ground. How everyone had left immediately after the funeral, leaving Jack, Peter, and Lila's gravestone left. How the cold gravestone had felt underneath Jack's fingers when he ran them over her name. How Peter had just sank onto the ground, staring at the stone.

"I'm not even hungry." Peter snapped Jack out of his mind. "Goodnight." Then just like that, the boy had faded into his bedroom.

Jack cleared the dishes from the table, letting the dread soak into him. Tomorrow would be a complete nightmare. Tomorrow was April 20th. Tomorrow was Lila's birthday.

Jack slumped down the streets early the next morning. The air was cool even though the sun lit the sky, and the chilling breeze didn't help at all. Rocks were scattered all over the sidewalk and Jack kicked at them unconsciously, for the only thing he was aware of were the maroon roses thumping against his leg. The city scene around him began to ebb away, being replaced with dark trees and black metal fence.

He was getting close.

A gate squeaked as he opened it. The metal was ice cold. He weaved through a maze of stones, flowers scattered on the ground next to them. He hadn't realized his body was trembling until he had felt the roses in his hands behind to slip from his grip. Jack stopped when he arrived in front of a lonely grave, no flowers littered at its feet. His heart stopped.

Someone had beaten him there, for a figure sat on their knees, running their fingers along her name carved into the stone.

Peter.

Jack hadn't thought the boy would've wanted to visit her on this day. Jack knew this was hard for him. Jack backed away, silently watching Peter. He could hear quiet sobs echo through the graveyard. Peter laid something beside Lila's grave. Jack saw it catch the sun. It was something beautiful, for it twinkled brightly like a star.

"Thought you might want it back love. Something to remember me by." Peter whispered the words as he set down the thing. He touched the gravestone once more before leaving, seeming to not notice Jack.

It was Jack's turn now. He slowly approached her grave, he could hear his heart thumping in his chest. What had Peter left? He crouched down, the dirt on the ground covering his pants. Setting the maroon roses down to grab the thing, he realized what it was. Tears stung Jack's eyes, and his throat tightened.

The necklace. The little silver diamond in the center was still attached to the necklace. Jack ran his fingers down the bumpy silver chain, as he recalled the necklace.

Peter had given her the necklace the day before she had died. Jack had watched him fumble with the clasp, as he draped the necklace around her neck.

"Something to remember me by." Peter had told her. Lila had cried, for Jack remembered the oval tears that slipped down her cheeks. It had been Lila's wish to be buried wearing that necklace, though for some reason they hadn't let her. Peter had kept it all this time. He had kept the burning memory of Lila's death for a year.

Jack wiped his eyes, laying the roses on her grave, arranging them in some odd way Lila had liked. He ran his hand down her grave, feeling the letters like a blind person would feel braille.

"See you someday Lila." Jack patted the top of the gravestone before beginning to maze through the graveyard.

And Lila watched from heaven, joy filling her up, like air fills a balloon. They hadn't forgotten about her. She smiled at the sight of the purple red flowers, let a single tear run down her face at the sight of the necklace.

"See you guys someday." She whispered.

See you guys someday.