81 comments

Science Fiction Fantasy

The Mountains look shorter today. Perhaps this means hope, but maybe not.

"Grass."

I look to my left and see my friend tumbling down a Hill nearby.

"Grass," he calls again as he climbs the small Hill which I am sitting on top of.

"What's the matter, Tree?" I ask the tall figure that now looms over me.

"Look what I found," Tree says and holds up a circular object covered in vibrant greens and blues, and flecks of white.

"What is that?" I take the object from his hand and hold it up to take a better look.

"I asked Owl and she said that it's Earth. It's the place we live on," Tree says in an excited tone.

"Earth" I whisper and lower the sphere.

I look at the Mountains in the distance with blurred texture. The sharp and round edges of electronic boxes both small and large create a jagged ascent to the top of the Mountain which no one has yet attempted to reach. At least, not to my knowledge.

"Isn't it neat?" Tree says in awe as he takes Earth back into his own hands and cups it between two palms.

"Neat?" I test the word in my mouth, "Maybe not," I conclude.

Tree looks up from Earth and meets my eyes with confusion but remains silent.

"Where is Flower?"

Tree and I turn to see Owl scaling up the Hill. As she nears us, she leaves a trail of dirt and shoes tumbling with every step she uses to propel herself upwards.

"Eating, I suppose," I say after a moment.

Owl frowns. "At this rate, she will finish the Fill by herself."

Tree snorts and laughs. "Are you sure she hasn't already?"

I stifle my laughter.

"Crow should be with her," I answer the silent question that Tree does not ask.

"Great, they won't leave us anything good," Tree says and suddenly jumps up.

He blocks the sun that is beginning to scorch my jaded skin.

"Stay there," I say.

"I'm not going to shade you all day." Tree rolls his eyes.

I shrug. "Couldn't hurt to try."

"Come on," Owl hoots. She is already descending the Hill; this time she is following the trail of tumbling worn heels, sneakers, and broken sandals in her descent.

Tree and I follow, careful not to entangle ourselves in the loose laces and straps, and the occasional string of connected Velcro footwear that had lost their other half. I look back to see the abandoned sphere of green and blue on top of the shoe Hill before catching up with Tree who now is carrying Owl upon his shoulders. Owl turns her head to make sure I am still there.

Upon arriving at the Fill, we hear the tinkling of high pitched giggles. I roll my eyes but stop in my tracks to duck as something whizzes over my head. A rotten apple rolls to a stop a few paces away. Tree and Owl laugh, but I shake my head in dismay. Flower can be such a child and though Crow is supposed to be a good influence, this is not the case. 

"Hey!" Tree calls to the two that are hidden from sight on the other side of the Fill.

The top of a head appears and Crow's sleek black hair follows as the rest of the head and the body emerges. Two slender arms appear immediately after, stretching before revealing the rest of Flower's flexible limbs as she jumps up from her spot.

"Save us anything good?" Owl asks as she takes large strides up the Fill towards Flower and Crow, ruffling Crow's hair once she reaches him.

Crow frowns at his sister while he straightens his hair that now sits askew on the top of his head. Flower pulls a dusty, half-eaten cob of corn from her pocket and hands it to Owl and then tosses two bottles of dirt speckled water to Tree and I. This water is cleaner than the bucketful that Flower found last week. I take a swig and marvel at clumps of damp mud that run down my throat.

"Cheers," Tree says as he extends his crumpled, plastic bottle towards mine.

I smile. "Cheers."

I watch as Crow skitters around the Fill, snatching up bits and pieces of food scraps between his slender, claw-like fingers and then tossing them into the air before catching the pieces in between his dry lips. I begin to walk over to him to offer my water but Owl stops me.

"Don't bother," she says.

I shrug and sit where I was standing The sky is darkening as we finish our meal. Though we cannot see the sun, we know that it is setting behind the grey smog that covers the sky. 

As the first drop of rain reaches the uneven ground, the five of us scramble for cover. Under a canopy patched together by Tree using pieces of tarp and duct tape, we sit huddled against one another in a line, watching as the rain drenches the Fill, the Hill, and the Mountains in the distance. 

Crow is the last to make it under the canopy and before he sits he tries to shake the water out of his hair. Owl glares at him as he splatters water on her clothing but chooses to remain silent rather than lecture him the way she usually does as lightening flashes beneath the thickness of the grey sky above us.

I retrieve the buckets from the back of our canopy and place them in front where the tarps end. When I sit back down, I notice the small ball of green and blue in the distance on top of the Hill. I try to focus on its colours but when the rain starts to fall quicker and heavier, the Earth tips over the edge of the Hill and tumbles down, rolling out of sight as the rainfall draws a curtain over the landscape in front of us. 


September 21, 2020 04:48

You must sign up or log in to submit a comment.

81 comments

Jill Davies
17:25 Sep 28, 2020

I like that this is a bright story in a grim setting. Your tone is spot on in that respect. I would like to see more from this world

Reply

Ai Jiang
02:11 Oct 01, 2020

Thank you so much! I'm thinking about expanding it into a longer story!

Reply

Show 0 replies
Show 1 reply
Mustang Patty
12:46 Sep 27, 2020

Hi there, Thank you for sharing this well-written story. I enjoyed your imagery and lovely prose. The depth of your descriptions, along with the imagination stirred up with thoughts of this kind of future worked well. Keep writing and good luck, ~MP~

Reply

Ai Jiang
02:11 Oct 01, 2020

Thank you so much for your comment!

Reply

Show 0 replies
Show 1 reply
Mariam Mansuryan
10:34 Sep 25, 2020

I don't know what particularly made this story attractive, but it must have to do with two things. 1. The poeticism of your prose. 2. The way you describe a gloomy world without using any gloomy words. Which is quite praiseworthy.

Reply

Ai Jiang
16:32 Sep 26, 2020

Thank you so much for your feedback!

Reply

Show 0 replies
Show 1 reply
Arvind Kashyap
16:37 Sep 24, 2020

Sweet one. Loved reading it.

Reply

Ai Jiang
16:33 Sep 26, 2020

Thank you!

Reply

Show 0 replies
Show 1 reply
Milja Luomala
08:58 Sep 24, 2020

This was more beautiful than apocalyptic stories usually are, but it still works. The names were really creative. :)

Reply

Ai Jiang
16:34 Sep 26, 2020

Thank you so much! I was thinking about the age of the characters and they appeared quite young in my head which means they would’ve been born during this period and never knew what the world was like previously so for them the world might seem a lot more normal to them than to us.

Reply

Show 0 replies
Show 1 reply
Mark D
02:25 Sep 24, 2020

Hi Ai, that was such a clever story. Kinda makes me hope for an apocalypse so nature can get back to discovering itself. I loved the idea and the humanized characters. That was fantastic.

Reply

Ai Jiang
16:36 Sep 26, 2020

Thank you so much! It would be very interesting to see this story come to life but for our sake I hope it doesn’t aha

Reply

Show 0 replies
Show 1 reply
Julie Ward
18:31 Sep 23, 2020

Wow! What an imaginative and interesting story. Your descriptions are so tangible and yet so fantastical at the same time. I really enjoy the touch of humor you've layered in through each of your characters.

Reply

Ai Jiang
16:36 Sep 26, 2020

Thank you so much for your feedback!

Reply

Show 0 replies
Show 1 reply
Metaxia Tzimouli
09:58 Sep 23, 2020

Great imagery! I felt like I was right in the middle of the story!

Reply

Ai Jiang
16:36 Sep 26, 2020

Thank you! I often find it difficult between telling too much and telling just enough so I’m glad that you were immersed!

Reply

Show 0 replies
Show 1 reply
D. Jaymz
01:50 Sep 23, 2020

Interesting. Definitely thought-provoking. ~~~~~~ For, 'snatching up bits and pieces of food scrapes between his slender,'. I believe you meant, 'snatching up bits and pieces of food scraps between his slender,'. 'scraps' instead of 'scrapes'.

Reply

Ai Jiang
16:38 Sep 26, 2020

Thank you for your feedback and pointing out the error! I’ll be sure to go back and change it when I get the chance!

Reply

D. Jaymz
18:14 Sep 26, 2020

You're welcome 😊 It'll be interesting to follow your highly creative work.

Reply

Show 0 replies
Show 1 reply
Show 1 reply
Kendall Defoe
23:46 Sep 22, 2020

Very intriguing work...

Reply

Ai Jiang
16:37 Sep 26, 2020

Thank you!

Reply

Show 0 replies
Show 1 reply
S. Closson
21:47 Sep 22, 2020

Very dark and vivid. I really enjoyed it!

Reply

Ai Jiang
16:38 Sep 26, 2020

Thank you so much!

Reply

Show 0 replies
Show 1 reply
Saige Severin
17:54 Sep 22, 2020

I love the folklore vibe that this has to it. It feels like a really vivid fable, and it's a totally original take on the prompt. Great job!

Reply

Ai Jiang
16:38 Sep 26, 2020

Thank you so much!

Reply

Show 0 replies
Show 1 reply
06:24 Sep 21, 2020

Hey, Ai would you be kind to watch the first video it's on Harry potter. https://youtu.be/KxfnREWgN14 Sorry for asking your time, I would ready your story

Reply

Ai Jiang
16:40 Sep 26, 2020

Hi Prathamesh, I’ll be sure to take a look!

Reply

13:29 Sep 27, 2020

Thank you

Reply

Show 0 replies
Show 1 reply
Show 1 reply
Ananya Voss
22:24 Mar 29, 2021

Wow, l loved the cryptic nature of this story. Is it the end of a dark dystopian existence where the microcosms of what existed before now take on larger than life qualities with the names they carry? Is it about profligacy & the price left to pay? Can be read over & over for varied meanings. Excellent!

Reply

Show 0 replies
11:23 Nov 12, 2020

Hii, Ai Sorry to intervene, in this brutal manner, I have a request for you would be kind to give a single glance over the vehicle which my team had been working over months. https://www.instagram.com/p/CHX5VUPBJOp/?igshid=5f72nb3cgg30 Sorry to take your time and If possible like the post.Because this would help team to win

Reply

Show 0 replies
11:22 Nov 12, 2020

Nice story

Reply

Show 0 replies
Lacey Wiggins
02:54 Sep 27, 2020

Very interesting! Good work. I'm new here and if you see this I would love for you to check out my entry! I don't have any followers or likes yet and I could really use the help.

Reply

Ai Jiang
02:12 Oct 01, 2020

Hi Lacey! I'll be sure to check out your work! :)

Reply

Lacey Wiggins
06:40 Oct 01, 2020

Thank you so much ❤

Reply

Show 0 replies
Show 1 reply
Show 1 reply
Unknown User
19:25 Sep 24, 2020

<removed by user>

Reply

Ai Jiang
16:33 Sep 26, 2020

Thank you so much!! :)

Reply

Show 0 replies
Show 1 reply
Writer Maniac
08:01 Sep 22, 2020

Woah!!! I love how vividly the story was written, it has such a beautiful message and the humour is so on point!!! I absolutely loved the story!!! I hate to be that annoying person, but please do check out my stories, if it's not too much trouble:))) Once again, keep up the good work!!!

Reply

Ai Jiang
16:39 Sep 26, 2020

Thank you and no worries I’ll be sure to when I get the chance!:)

Reply

Show 0 replies
Show 1 reply
RBE | We made a writing app for you (photo) | 2023-02

We made a writing app for you

Yes, you! Write. Format. Export for ebook and print. 100% free, always.