In The Rain And Under The Stars

Whenever there's a clear night sky like this one tonight I always look up to see those bright dots. According to the astrology classes I took once some of them are planets, some of them are suns like ours and this always makes me think about how much we appreciate the magnificence of the things that appear small in our life's which might just be major.

I personally think that modern humanity has become very materialistic, and has forgotten the importance of the stars, both energetically and symbolically. My grandmother use to say that 'the symbols of the stars are many, but their numbers represent the number of souls that have fallen from heaven.'

"Seriously? your back for the first time in what two years? it's your first night and your already staring up at the stars as if you never left" he stated as if I was doing the silliest thing ever.

"you know, just between us I kind of missed you" he continued taking me completely off guard, what was wrong with him?, he has been acting weird from the moment I arrived here.

"Nick, your my brother and I love you but this whole thing with you being nice is kind of freaking me out" I stated causing him to push me playfully on the shoulder as he laughed.

Nick and I were enemies when his father proposed to my mother but over the years we've learned to get along as if we were blood-related.

"Soooo," I said wanting him to bring up the conversation of why we were back at home in the middle of summer.

"soooo" he mocked

"come on Nick, you haven't called me in what four months?, and then out of nowhere you ask for a favour" he scratched the back of his head and avoided my eyes as soon as I brought that up.

"Our parents obviously don't know what's going on and apparently neither do I, so what's going on Nick?"

"well, for one thing Theo still talks about you for some reason" he stated causing me to glare at him

"Theo James?"

"yep that's the one and secondly I'm kinda getting married" he mumbled causing me to instantly look over at him.

"have you been experimenting with drugs again?" I asked as I placed my hand up to feel his forehead and tried to hold his eyes open so that I could see his pupils.

"I'm being serious Sal," he said as he got up out of my reach.

"you're serious? mom and Dan are clueless and we don't even know the girl yet still your getting married" I said unbelievable

"that's not the problem they know about her and the wedding, Sal, your the problem"

"What!?" I asked not understanding at all, he was definitely experimenting because nothing he was saying made sense.

"I'm marrying Kelsey, Salome" he stated firmly

"What?" my voice almost a whisper

"I'm marrying Kelsey Richards and I want you to be one of her maid of honours" he replied softly and slowly.

This caused me to laugh, it stated out softly but over time developed into overblown hysterical laughing.

"I can't tell if this is going good or bad," his father said who was now standing at my door.

"so you'll do it?" he asked now smiling

"No, are you F-ing insane!, Kelsey Richards is a bitch, the devil herself," I said and I honestly didn't have to tell him this because he already knew all these things.

"We aren't kids anymore Sal, things aren't the same, people change"

"People like Kelsey Richards never change she ruined all my teen years, she black mailed me once, because of her most of the school's population hated me, I developed multiple eating disordes because of her, she's the reason why Theo......., why I went away"

"can you just stop being selfish for just a minute and be happy for me" he shouted back at me taking me way off gaurd.

" I swear from the bottom of my heart that I'm happy for you, I truly am but what you asked of me is unacceptable, maybe you should stop and think about how selfish that was of you" and just like that I took up my purse and headed out.

When he had called me and asked if I was able to make it home for the summer I thought that he just wanted to be with his family during a holiday break and that was completely normal but this, this is completely off the charts.

If I remember correctly a 24-hour diner should be a few blocks or corners away. Its been so long since I've been back here and I never really thought that I would be back.

I had applied for collages that were far away so that I'd be gone as soon as my high school days were over, unfortunately that had changed but on the bright side it just so happened that I got a job during my first year of college that paid well so there was never any need for me to come back here. Not for holidays or anything else.

"great " I mumbled after feeling a couple of raindrops on my skin, I had felt so connected only a few minutes ago and now I just feel so lost with so many thoughts swimming around in my head.

I didn't even try to run in search of shelter when the rain began pouring harder, I just continued to walk in search of the diner I remembered.

The road had been so dead, not even one vehicle had passed me since I started walking so the headlights that were heading my way had definitely started up a spark of hope inside my chest. Without thinking I started to inch closer to the road a begun waving my hands around as if I was a crazy person.

 I didn't expect to get a ride, just directions, I mean come on I was soaking wet. The chances of this vehicle stopping was close to zero but the moment the vehicle stopped in front of me and the window rolled down I was starting to regret ever coming back here.

"Salom?" he asked in shock, he didnt even blink for a while as if the moment he closed his eyes I would disappear.

"Still leaving off the last part of my name as always Theo" I replied not knowing what else to say.

I could see it in his eyes that a lot was going on in his mind and I didn't want to stick around to find out exactly what he was thinking, so before our encounter could become awkward I turned and started to continue my journey.

'Wait' it sound as if he was saying but the slight distance and the music of the rain hitting everything it could made it unclear.

"Salome stop, wait!!" he shouted sounding a lot clearer than before and this time he added the 'e on my name but I didn't stop

"we've done this before Salom and this time I'm not letting you go so you might as well stop" for some reason the fact that he brought up the past caused me to stop walking for a bit, just a slight moment of hesitation in my movements.

The sound of his SUV door closing indicated that he was now in the rain and explained why I was able to hear him clearly.

"I've been calling, I've been trying," he said as he came closer taking slow steps as if he didn't what to scare me away.

"I know"

"I'm sorry about what Nick did, I told him not to" this caused me to take a step back from him.

"You knew?" I stated but it came out souning more like a question but of course he knew, I bet he's one of the best man's.

"No, don't you dare take another step," I said as he started to inch closer once again, "and your ok with what there doing?" he didn't answer, deep down I knew he felt the same way I did, he's the only person who might just dislikes Kelsey almost as much as I did.

"Answer me!"I demanded, still no answer

"She did this to us Theo, because of her we are in this position! "

"And you think I don't know that!" he shouted back at me causing me to feel a lot colder than I already was.

"Every time I see her or anyone of your family members in town I think of you and it pains me to think about what happened but at least I didn't run!" in no time I was in front of him pointing a finger in his chest angrily.

"You have no idea what I've been threw," I said a bit calmer, my eyes turned into slits

" your right I don't because you never allowed anyone to help you, not even me"

 "I left so that we could take a break from each other, from all of this, so that you of all person could move on but you never did" by now my hands had fallen to my side and my knees were getting weaker by the seconds.

"you just kept on calling and sending letters, no matter how many times I got a new number or changed my address you always returned"

"How long is it going to take you to realize that I wanted to help, I never wanted space"

"We lost a child Theo, I wanted space and you made it so hard not to think about it, about you, even though I was so many miles away" his eye turned sad the moment I mentioned it.

"I cried myself so many time just thinking about you and what happened" this time I staggered but he held me up quickly. I tried to push him away but I felt so weak, so useless all over again.

"I did too, I cried because of all of this and the fact that you stopped loving me," he said as we slid to our knees. his statement caused me to shake my head no.

Turned my head up to the stars that were still in the sky, it all felt too familiar. We had done this before. We had shouted at each other in the rain as the sun went down a long time ago when I had told him that I was pregnant but he had been the one who shaked his head no when I had asked if he was going to leave me to handle the situation alone.

I had shouted at him over and over blaming him for what he had done and just like this very moment all our arguing had ended with us looking up at the glowing sky as the rain drizzled on us.