Flaring in and out

          Flaring in and out

“Are you still not ready Siya? We’ll be late for the ‘puja’, even Sam is waiting for crackers” ,yelled my mom from the veranda. I was almost done; and actually quite excited for this ‘diwali’ as after 4 years I got the chance to celebrate it with my family. I had the flight post midnight to rejoin my office so we had to wrap up the celebrations fast. I dressed pretty lavishly though; in traditional ‘saree’, studded with beads and embroidered with silver lace, ornaments worn head to toe ; taking time no less than the bride. And why not? I was a diva in my college and my smoky eyes were the heart throb of all boys of the college. So this icing on cake was mandatory tool today also, although my crush was 600km away from here and he never paid heed to these shrewd black eyes; but who knows when their black magic could work! 

I came out. All around we could feel the vibes of happiness and festivity. Aroma of candles and lamps, mouth-watering fragrances of the food items, hub-bub of people greeting and of course the noise of crackers. We finished ‘puja’ after which Sam went out with his neighbourhood friends to fire crackers. “Be careful Sam, don’t go too near the fire, and mind the surroundings ”,worried my mother again. Father came to rescue “Ah! he’s old enough now, not a nursery child. When I was 15…”. “Stop! Stop now. Not your school stories again.” interrupted my mom. 

I also went out to have a look. “Hey Aaryan! You are back?”,a voice said from behind. I turned around. My neighbour aunty was asking a sturdy looking guy there. “Wait! What? he is Aaryan?”I thought to myself in utter amazement. “This is how time changes. Huh! He always used to cheat from my copy in school and god knows which university accepted him.” I continued to stare at him, “Ah! Gym really changes looks. But Vir is still the best! These muscles do no good.” As I was staring and fighting in my thoughts his eyes caught a look and he saw me staring him. I was a bit embarrassed and more irritated so I left with an arrogant expression to Sam to help him with the crackers. 

There is a law which always applied to me in whole of the college life. My beauty and black magical eyes always worked like fumes of incense stick on guys I was never interested in but for Vir they were mere smoke - injurious for his health. “Long time Siya!”, said Aaryan with a pleasant face. With frowning expression and tinch of hubris I replied, “Oh! No one can recognise you.” Confused he said, “Huh? I was away and you are seeing me after 6 years so I look different.” “Yeah, you even started flirting.” I replied while helping Sam. “Well, its not the case; yes, you are looking pretty enough to flirt, is no lie” he replied calmly with a smile. “You are really pro at this.” said I without looking at him. “Careful! You are too close to lamp.”he exclaimed. I ignored him in order to end the conversation. “Perhaps I could help you?”he asked. “Your dress is too long and may catch fire.” I lighted a candle gave it to Sam to continue with his friends and he left. “Thank you so much for your concern but I’m not such a fool that cannot even do such a small thing.” “Fine, if you need help you can ask.” Saying this he entered my house looking for mu mom. My mom and dad had gone to neighbours and there was no one at home but I didn’t bother to inform him this.

“Uncle aunty is not at home?” he asked coming out of the room to the open area. “Can’t you see yourself?” I replied harshly and started to light a sparkler in order to prove my dumb talent. “You were not that harsh in school. What happened to you after that?” he asked solemnly. I stared at him for a while and said, “You were never comparable to me in any aspect then also and even now you stand nowhere in front of me. Don’t you try to impress me by your cheap tactics.” “When did I do that? You are pretty enough, you might be having a boyfriend, I don’t care. I never meant to impress you. I came here to see you as an old classmate.” “AHH!”I screamed. I was staring him so madly that I forgot the sparkler burnt whole and the flame reached my fingers. I threw it away hurriedly and it fell just behind me. “You ok!? Show me.” He seemed worried and took my hands to have a look. It was a minor burn. He started blowing air onto it and said, “ I warned you to be careful. It was not my pick up line. But you wanted to prove your smartness. I know your nature from long ago.” “Enough, I am fine.” I said taking my hands off, being embarrassed to be such an idiot . “Let it be”, and he grasped my hands again more firmly. “I knew the distance between us since the day you rejected my proposal .But today…” he paused. “You call that joke a proposal?” “Who said it was a joke?” I was so close to him that I could feel his breath. I gazed into his eyes. “That first infatuation is still the purest thing happened to me.” Then he looked back in my eyes and something arose inside me. This feeling I never had with any man; not even with Vir. I had been this close with him, we bumped into each other and that was my moment of love. I used to get shy and blushed and had a kind of euphoria. But this was so different ,so intense, so fierce like a fire, uncontrollable with a tinch of pain. This fire was burning me in and out. “FIRE!” he shouted. The free end of my ‘saree’ had caught fire and it started to spread reaching to my shoulders. He immediately snatched the free end and my saree was half undraped. “Don’t panic, don’t worry! I’m here.” I actually didn’t cared about myself but was lost in him. The surrounding behind me also caught fire. He tried to extinguish it by kicking but it didn’t work much.

“Wait a bit, I’m bringing water.” , and he went inside. I was pondering over my action and was sorry for my rudeness and stupidity. “How could I…!But he seriously liked me? No! he made fun of me infront of everyone. But that proposal…was is real? Or is this confession real? But we have been haters always. Ahh!..” Suddenly I saw water showering on me. I looked up. He was on my terrace holding water pipe and splashing water on me. I was looking at him, I don’t know why? I don’t know why I was getting attracted to him suddenly. I had my so called love Vir, but I couldn’t even think of him. And this uneasiness I never felt before. He stopped the water. The fire onmy clothes were out. The surrounding was still burning a bit. He came down. I was all drenched and my clothes were burnt and torn. By the time some people also started to gather around out house boundary wall. “Go in and change.” he said with his eyes down. I was still awestruck and could barely move. “People will spread more rumors. Go in and change.” I took a step and got slipped on water. He got a hold of me. Again I could feel his closeness, his heart beat, and that fire in me still burning bright. He grabbed my waist close to him and took me in his arms and walked inside home. As his arms curled around me, the flames of my fire coiled my soul hard. The flower pot crackers blew in full flame behind us on streets and so was my internal flame. The crackers covered the sky like bright umbrellas. The fire I caught was extinguished by him ,but the fire in me was still flaring which he hadn’t pacified yet.