Misery

The birds were chirping and enjoying the cool breeze. The grass was wet due to the dewdrops. The just-risen sun shone softly on the city streets, bringing with it a flurry of early-morning activity. Brock young man with brown eyes, dark hair, and a slim body got back from his meditation session. Sat in the corner of the room facing the wall immersed into deep thoughts. Ray who is a therapist in welfare rehabilitation center smiled and wished "Good morning Brock,"

"Good morning!" replied Brock.

"How are you feeling today?" examined Ray.

Brock sat still, not even uttering a single word facing the wall.

"All right Brock, it's been two months since you came to this center and you have not spoken anything about your problem, we are here for you feel free to speak up anytime." insisted Ray. 

Ray left the room with discontent remembering the fact that he has been saying the same thing to Brock ever since he came to the center, but there was no effort from his side. 

That evening Ray heard thudding noise from afar, suddenly he felt something was not right. He rushed to that area and startled to see Brock with a bleeding head who was banging his head against the wall. He panicked and called staffs for help, all together grabbed Brock and sent him to treatment ward. Brock dozed off after the injection.

After a few hours, he scrunched his eyes at the bright light that was sipping through his closed eyelids. He slowly started blinking and opened his eyes to see what's around him. Ray was standing in front, examining Brock. All of a sudden, Brock ran into tears, holding Ray's arms. He hugged and patted him in the back, consoling him. After which Brock started to explain his problems from the beginning.

My childhood years were a nightmare I was weedy, and sickly. I had a problem in my stomach when I was two, so I had an operation. Due to which my food cycle was affected, and no matter how much I ate, I was so skinny. In school, no one allowed me to join in their friend's group as I was no use to them in any way. Most of them kicked, punched, and harassed me because I was weak and could not fight back against them. Others nicknamed me in a mean way and shouted where ever I went that affected me mentally.

To distract myself from all these, I chose sports as an option. I played some games like cricket, badminton, football and some indoor games. I was intermediate in all these, neither excellent nor worst. Due to my lack of strength, I could not throw or kick the ball faster for that they curse me and shut me down in front of everyone. Even though it's not their fault, I tried my best for my team but could not satisfy them to the fullest due to my inability. 

Teachers also played a part in bullying me. Some times when I got low marks or performed least in any activities, they mock and joke at my body in front of the whole class. All boys and girls laugh at me, and I stand heads down in shame because it's out of my hands.

I tried to please them, and to stay away from them, however, I was insulted in the end.

The next hardest part came when I was in my teenage. Puberty hit everyone except me. I didn't undergo any changes in my body. I was shocked all children of my age started growing in their way. I never had any symptoms of a man. While everyone was enjoying their lovely teen and youth, I was wondering what's wrong in me.

My parents supported me in every possible way by taking to different doctors, giving both traditional and standard medicines, but no miracle happened in my life. I was still having a gaunt look, noodles like legs and hands, and babyface. I looked like a school kid, even in my twenties. All relatives and strangers never forgot to mock and laugh at my appearance. For them, it may seem like a joke, but for me, their comment made me feel so low. 

I looked too young for my age, which prohibited me from many enjoyments that one enjoys from the transition of teen to adult. People never allowed me to take part in all those things, and I was left alone with longingness. I was allowed to enjoy stuffs only kids can enjoy and other normal functions. Then I tried many attempts for suicide because of some good friends I had at that time I survived. I remained in the same condition, but life went on. Even though I had access to do everything of my age but still, all those things were not possible for me. I felt like I was caged, with lots of hurdles.

I too had emotions, and I could not control them, I had a crush on a girl when I spoke about that she refused to accept me because of my weakness. I was never mad at her, logically she was right. With all my problems, I cannot protect and satisfy her in all situations. I was left helpless in every aspect. I felt like a puppet every time playing to other's actions and emotions suppressing my own. At this peak time, unfortunately, I crossed paths, wrong people. They manipulated me, and I became a drug addict. 

One day I planned for a short trip and traveled by bus. The long shadows of the evening dissolved into the gathering darkness of the nighttime. The air-cooled, birds went to their nests silenced, and the crickets sang. The bus halted for a minute in its regular stop, a creepy guy with blue eyes, big arms, messy hair, dark clothes boarded the bus. There were few passengers on the bus, but he sat beside my seat. He gave a scary look and turned away. Few hours passed, he slowly came near me as if asking about time and when will the bus reach the destination. Even though he was friendly, I was terrified, and I just said the details and turned away. A few moments later, he said he was not feeling well and wanted to lay down. I was sacred, so didn't refuse his request, his hands slowly touched my male part, and harassed me. I revolted against him, but he was so strong. Analyzing my struggle, he took his gun out and forced me to get down of the bus at the next stop. I tried to seek help by showing signs, but none of them understood, and I was left helpless. That area was already dark, abandoned, and no signs of people. It served as an added advantage for his cruel intentions. We left the bus, and when the bus moved, he dragged me to a haunted place and molested me. I struggled a lot against him, and finally, he trashed me to bleed and fled from the spot. 

The next morning some guys found me unconscious and admitted me to a nearby hospital. I received treatment for some days, and soon doctors found out that I was a drug addict, and they planned to shift to a rehabilitation center. I found that somehow and escaped from that hospital. Came back to my place, and after a few weeks, resumed my work but felt bland and weak. All these experiences made me to avoid people as much as possible. Lived a dull life for some years, and then one day, I passed out in the workplace. My colleagues against my wish treated and admitted me here.

"That's my story," concluded Brock.

Ray with watery eyes hugged Brock, for his haunted past; He ensured to help him every way possible and guide him to live a good life in the future.