13 comments

Sad Fantasy Suspense

 You screamed. I looked around, was there a wasp nearby? Your eyes were wide and your lip was quivering, you were on the verge of crying. You picked up the nearest rock and threw it at me. I dodged it. Was rock throwing a type of human game? You were backing away, chucking every item you could find in my direction. 

“Get away from me!” You screeched. Those words stung just as much as the sharp stone that sliced my shoulder. 

“Stop!” I spoke for the first time. You stopped in your tracks, as did I. I was as stunned as you were. I took a deep breath.  

“I’m Cloud.” I said. “Your friend.” 

Your tears flowed freely. You still didn’t respond. Instead, you frantically ran towards the house, stumbling as you sprinted. 

“Please!” I yelled, desperate. It was then I realized I was crying too. There were some things I hated about being a person. I took a wobbly step forward. I hadn’t yet mastered the art of walking. I put another foot forward. I strolled toward you like a zombie, my feet oddly placed.

You had already gone inside the house, I was far behind. Why did you hate me? I hadn’t done anything wrong. 

You opened your front door and stepped out. You pointed something metallic at me, I wasn’t quite sure what it was. 

“Fucking monster,” you said, as you twitched your finger.



Then there was pain. 

I didn’t feel it instantly. First I felt the cool dewey grass against my back, and the warm glow of the sun. But the torture came, sure as ever. 

Had I been hit by an asteroid? You told me about shooting stars once, and what they really were. 

I was cold. It was very cold.

I brought my hands to my stomach. They came back covered in blood. Did that belong to me? The agony worsened. I yelped, but I wasn’t sure why. I wiped something from my face, which was wet too. I felt terrible, every part of me ached. I was exhausted. Had you done this to me? I opened my eyes and saw you standing over me, the resentment you held for me clear on your face. 

“Why?” I managed to utter, my voice scratchy. 

You scoffed. But didn’t answer. 



I didn’t like being human. 








I opened my eyes to bright lights. 

The air tasted stale, and everything was either white or light blue. 

Your parents were sitting next to my bed. 


They begged me not to Sue. 

Who was Sue again?

I said I wouldn’t tell Sue, and they laughed. They looked relieved.  

At one point your mother turned to your father and whispered something about how I wasn’t a threat. Of course I wasn’t a threat! That’s what I was trying to tell you! Your parents understood. I wanted to talk to you, I wanted to tell you I forgive you for yelling at me. I wanted to apologize for scaring you, I truly didn’t mean to. 

I opened my mouth to speak.

“What hurt me?” I asked, the words felt foreign in my mouth. 

“What do you mean?” Asked your mother. Her name-tag spelled something, but I couldn’t read it. The letters were unfamiliar to me. 

“What hurt me?” I repeated. Your mother had bad hearing. 

Your parents stayed silent.

“Jennifer, care to explain?” Your father turned his face to your mother with a tight smile. Your mother, who I now knew as Jennifer, (what an interesting name!) cleared her throat. I waited patiently for an answer. 

“You were shot,” she replied, speaking quickly. She explained that someone named Lilith had almost killed me with that metallic thing (it’s called a gum). Apparently they said they thought I was a burglar. Your name was Lilith? For some reason, I thought it would be something a little more…. creative. Well, I guess your name wasn’t really up to you.

Why did you despise me? I had been there for you, everyday. Yet you felt obliged to try and murder me! I saw the hatred in your eyes; burning like a fire. I felt like a cypress, trapped. 

I closed my eyes. 

How was I supposed to live in this realm by myself? I had no clue how to act human. First I had to name myself. I don’t think the name ‘Cloud’ is very common here. 

What was your least favorite name? Seeing as you already hated me, I decided to name myself Jonathan.

“Excuse me?” I asked your mom. 

“Yes?” She replied.

“How can I change my name?” 

“What do you want to change it to?” 

“Jonathan,” I said smugly. Your mother gave me a strange look. 

“That’s a boy’s name.” She explained. I was confused, what was wrong with having a male name? Your mother must have seen the look of puzzlement on my face.

“How ‘bout I get you a list of suitable names, okay?” 

Why were humans so strict about genders? At home, anyone could be anything. 

“That’d be great,” I replied politely. “Can I see Lilith?” 

Your mother bit her lip and shook her head. 

“Oh,” I said, disappointed. I wanted to give you a chance to explain yourself. I didn’t want to jump to conclusions. 

I decided to sleep. 






Your mother woke me up. 

“How do you like the name Jane?” She asked. 

“I hate it.” I replied, forgetting my manners. 

Your mother made a face. 

“Being in the hospital has really gotten to you,” She stated, trying to make sense of my behavior. 

“Sure.” I answered, emotionless. 

With no sign of the conversation continuing, your mother walked out of the room, muttering to herself. 

I captured the opportunity to reflect. 




You weren’t supposed to be able to talk to me.

Our two worlds were kept separate, and for good reason. 

It was hard to slip past the guards to communicate. 

I came here for you. 

I transformed for you

We were supposed to be best friends. 

Instead, you ended up hurting me. 

Vengeance will be mine.

I will not suffer alone. 



The silence of the world is louder than the sea. 


The sorrow is like a swirl of what can never be.


I will get my revenge, just you wait and see.  










April 06, 2021 00:26

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13 comments

Writer Maniac
13:16 Apr 11, 2021

I'm sorry I'm so late, I had a few exams I needed to study for, but I'm here! I really enjoyed the story, it was really unique and I loved how the characters were Lilith and a cloud, it was very interesting to see. Well done!

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Nettle Swanson
17:52 Apr 11, 2021

Thank you!

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Phoenix Feather
00:09 Apr 07, 2021

Wonderful. Just... wonderful.

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Nettle Swanson
21:56 Apr 08, 2021

Thank you!

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Parpixe .
01:59 Apr 06, 2021

Would love a sequel!

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Nettle Swanson
02:02 Apr 06, 2021

I'll work on it :)

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. .
01:58 Apr 06, 2021

Perfectly written, great job!

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Nettle Swanson
02:02 Apr 06, 2021

Thanks!

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01:57 Apr 06, 2021

This story is amazing!!!!!!!

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Nettle Swanson
02:02 Apr 06, 2021

Thank you so much!

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Nettle Swanson
00:28 Apr 06, 2021

I'm looking for a new title, any suggestions?

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01:57 Apr 06, 2021

This title is perfect

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Nettle Swanson
02:02 Apr 06, 2021

Thank you!

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