Wills

In 1988 I hit the Florida lottery for 16 million and after taxes of 37% I still had enough to financially take care of my family and closes friends. The funny thing about winning money you soon discover you have a whole lot of relatives and church people you never knew existed.

The first advice my attorney’s quoted to me is that I quickly make a will. I was only 27 years of age at the time and me dying never even entered my young mind.

After spending 43% of my winnings on  "Wine, women and song" that is a hendiatris that endorses hedonistic lifestyles or behaviors. A more modern form of the idea is often expressed as "Sex and Drugs and R&B".

I suddenly realized it was definitely time to make a will at least for the 14 children I helped to create or was tricked to create in just 5 years.

What I was truly amazed to discover that there are all kinds of wills. First there’s a Living Will despite the similarity in name, a Living Will actually does a lot more than a traditional Last Will and Testament can. Also called an Advance Healthcare Directive, a Living Will is good for end-of-life planning and to make your wishes known regarding medical care you may want in the future. In the event you become incapacitated for any reason and you can’t let doctors or loved ones know what you want, a Living Will can speak for you. The benefit of a Living Will is it greatly eases the burden on loved ones if tough decisions need to be made on your behalf. Note: that Living Wills become immediately ineffective once you pass away. I had to make sure my Living Will was valid in and specific to the state of Florida, as requirements can vary. 

I know if I didn’t soon draft a living Will my baby mamas wouldn’t have any problem pulling the plug on me in the event if something were to happen to me from having minor eye laser surgery.

Then there’s a Testamentary Trust Wills are sometimes referred to as Will Trusts or as Trust Under Wills. They are written inside a Will and can be used to direct asset distribution after your passing. This type of Trust differs from other Trusts in that it isn’t actually formed until after your death. Testamentary Trust Wills can be a good option if you need to set up long-term care for Beneficiaries. Note: Whereas most Trusts allow you to avoid it, Testamentary Trust Wills will go through probate, which can be a significant disadvantage. I’m thinking to myself that I’ll be dead and buried and won’t be able to Trust anyone. 

I would bet any amount of my winnings that the people and baby mamas I unwillingly loaned money too, in which I know I’ll never receive back one red cent, that they’ve never heard or dared to think about Pour-Over Wills, that works in conjunction with Revocable Living Trusts. They are designed to offer more privacy than a regular Last Will and Testament and work by “pouring over” any assets that don’t directly go to a Beneficiary into your Trust after you pass away. Pour-Over Wills are useful if you haven’t put everything into your Trust. Note: Property must go through probate before it ends up in your Trust, which can take time and money and cause stress on your loved ones. I’ve heard of Pour Over Coffee, Pour Over Kettle and even Pour Over by the police or is it Pull Over?

Now there’s Simple Wills, much like the name suggests, are simple in that they do not contain a lot of clauses. However, just because they’re simplistic in nature doesn’t mean they can’t be effective. You can do much of your basic planning in a Simple Will, including designating a guardian for minors and appointing an Executor. Note: Simple Will may not be the best option for very complicated or large estates. By the time I insist upon spending the rest of my money on self a Simple Will, will probably be best.

Unless the unprescribed drugs make me consider a Joint Will. A Will within one document for two people or more. They can be used in cases where baby mamas or the one baby daddy want to initially make each other Beneficiaries after one or all the others passes and then establish final Beneficiaries being a child or children once all partners are gone. Note: It’s important to note that Joint Wills automatically become irrevocable upon the first baby mamas death. This kind of Will is out of the question for me. The only joint I Will even consider is the kind you smoke.

Have you ever heard of a Deathbed Will in which are not desirable for several reasons? The biggest one being they are not as effective as other types of Wills. Made on a deathbed and most of the time under dire circumstances, there are often questions about mental stability and how comprehensive a Deathbed Will is. Note: While any Will is better than none at all, Deathbed Wills are more than likely to create problems for your loved ones after you pass. I’m really considering this kind of Will.

Relatively speaking, Online Wills are a fairly new concept in the world of Estate Planning. It’s true that there are very trustworthy, authoritative sources out there to help you create an effective and adequate Online Will. But you need to be careful about which DIY (Do It Yourself), online company you use to create your Will or any other Estate Planning documents. Note: Not all Online Will companies are the same. It’s an absolute must that you read online reviews. And most importantly, be sure that whichever company you go with has state-specific documents and forms that are created, drawn up and reviewed by actual lawyers and Estate Planning experts. I still pay my bills with money orders and refuse to buy or spend any money online.

When I seen that’s there’s Holographic Wills although there not all that common, Holographic Wills do actually still occasionally exist. These are handwritten Wills and are typically the result of extreme, unexpected circumstances such as war or another life-threatening situation. Note: Holographic Wills are not recognized as valid in Florida. 

Lastly, I discovered a Will called Nuncupative Wills that are a verbal explanation that expresses final wishes. Like Holographic Wills, Nuncupative Wills are not recognized in the state of Florida. Note: Since my family and baby mama’s are nothing but money grubbing parasites and would never be pleased with any amount of money I bequest to them I’ll just let them know that in Florida, like most states, has an intestacy law that describe where your property will go if you die with no Will. If you die married, your property will pass to your spouse, unless you have descendants. If you do not leave a surviving baby mamas, your estate will pass to my many heirs.