5 comments

Funny Kids Fiction

Ahhhh. Think of a paradise. Like Hawaii or to be more exact, Disneyworld. The happiest place on earth. Imagine you just booked a hotel suite for only $200 on Insta for Disneyworld! What a bargain you must think. Well if it's too good to be true, you shouldn’t buy it. That’s not what I did. I said, “What a bargain! I must buy it before it sells out!” DON’T ever be dumb like me. Well anyways, I bought it, I went there, I was all kind of hawaiian style. I get to the counter. “Hi! Umm. I booked a hotel here.” I say. “Ok!” The guy at the counter said. Then he gave me the key card for my room. He gave a suite with a great view! I couldn’t believe my luck! Lucky me I thought while I was at the elevator. Then a guy showed up right as I was about to close the elevator door. He kind of took up all my space in the elevator but I didn’t care. Then I pressed on the 42th floor button and the guy next to me was going to the same floor because he did not move. Oh wow what a coincidence! I thought. Oh well. I guess I didn’t mind him. We both went out of the elevator. When I went to the left he followed me. Ok is this guy stalking me? The only thing I could hope for was that it was just a coincidence again. When I tried to get rid of him by going the other way I was supposed to go, he just went to the side I was supposed to go! When I turned around and went to the side that I was supposed to go, he was standing at my room trying to open the door! “Umm Hey that’s my room.” I told him. “You sure, skinny? Cause it says it's my room on my keycard.” Ok now this guy was getting on my nerves. “Are you sure cause it says 367 on my keycard and isn’t that the door you're standing right in front of?” I said as I showed him my keycard. Then he showed me his. It was the same number! “Okayyyy… Then we should probably ask the guy we got the keycard from.” I said. “Hey man.. I’m sorry that I kind of screamed at you but you got on my nerves.” He apologized. “Hey man, I feel the same way. I’m sorry. Now let’s go talk to that guy.” I apologized too. We went down to the lobby and got on the line. “Guys, you guys look so cute with each other.” Someone said. For a second I was  so surprised that I was speechless. “Excuse me!” I said horrified at the thought. “Oh! You guys weren't like… together! Sorry!” A lady said. I was still speechless when I got to the front of the line. “Umm… Hello?” the guy at the counter said. I shook my head and said, “You gave me the same keycard as somebody else.” I told him. “Hmm. I don’t think I can give you another card. Unless you want to go home again, you have to share your hotel room with the person who has the same keycard.” he said. “Oh come on! I bet not every single hotel room is full.” I argued. “Well they are.” He said back. “Are you sure?” I said. “Yes.” He said. How could this be possible!? I thought while I was going back. “Well they can’t give me a new room!” I told him with a hint of annoyance in my voice. “Unless you just want to go back home, you're gonna have to share the room with me. So… I recommend you just go back to your house and come some other time. Ok?” I said to him. “No. You go to your house.” He said. “Excuse me?” I said speechless. “You go!” he said again. “Well.. I guess we’re going to have to share the room? I said trying to make him go to his house. “Ok with me.” he said. This guy was not having it! Shoot! My plan backfired and this was going to be a pain in the butt. “Okay!” I said fake laughing. “I know you're fake laughing.” He said. Then, I slowly turned to face him. Was he a warlock? He now creeped me out so bad. “Let’s just share a room then,” he said again. I opened the door to my-our *reech* room. Just thinking about the word, our, made me feel like barfing. Ok I needed to stop thinking like that. I was just sharing a room with someone else. Like in college! It was like having a roommate! I just needed to think positive. When I think about it, having a roommate was different because like their in your school and you might know each other and he wasn’t as fat as my *reech* roommate. Not to be mean or anything.  I went into my room first and there was only one bed! Oh no. This was bad, like bad bad. “Oh Come on! Can’t there be two beds!” I yelled. I probably was going to have to spend the night in the pool or in the ocean with the sharks. It would be better to be with hungry sharks rather than this guy! Ok maybe he would be better cause he’s probably not going to eat me like the sharks but yeah still. Although there were a LOT of bad things, there were a couple of good things! It had a great view and it had an amazing TV. And that was it for the up side. The TV was probably like what 80’’?! While I was looking at the room, my roommate went to use the bathroom. I needed to use the bathroom to cause I had some business to do in there. For the first 5 minutes, I could hold it but once it hit 10 minutes, I was literally dying to use the restroom. “Hey! I need to use the bathroom too if you didn’t notice the loud commotion outside!” I screamed at him. He didn’t respond. Then I remembered that he had taken something like a headphone or something in the restroom. Then I practically screamed at the top of my lungs, “Hey I need to go!!!” “Okay.. ugh.” he said obviously annoyed. This situation should’ve not been annoying for him but annoying for me! No, not annoyed but infuriated! He slowly walked out but I quickly pushed him so I could go. I closed the door and hurried onto the toilet. “Ahhhhh.” I said letting it all go.

March 06, 2021 02:52

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5 comments

Somegenius Kid
01:19 Mar 12, 2021

oops!! I accidently pressed on reply 3 times!

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Melanie Kreiger
01:20 Mar 11, 2021

Oh my! You had me laughing out loud at lines like "I know you're fake laughing" and "This was bad. Like bad bad." The ending was funny, but it left me wanting more resolution. Maybe you could end with your walking out and leaving the door open for him to "enjoy" the scent! (Try including paragraph breaks to help the reader through the text and help mark the change in speaker when writing dialogue). Love your sense of humor and the sarcastic tone of your characters' banter.

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Somegenius Kid
01:17 Mar 12, 2021

Oh my god!! I love that you loved my story! Thank you! Also I will try what you said! Thank you for the comment and the tip!! : )

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Somegenius Kid
01:17 Mar 12, 2021

Oh my god!! I love that you loved my story! Thank you! Also I will try what you said! Thank you for the comment and the tip!! : )

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Somegenius Kid
01:17 Mar 12, 2021

Oh my god!! I love that you loved my story! Thank you! Also I will try what you said! Thank you for the comment and the tip!! : )

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