Contest #252 shortlist ⭐️

60 comments

Fiction Funny

Jack Thompson’s fingers drummed a chaotic symphony against his cluttered desk, surrounded by the remnants of unrelenting perfectionism—crumpled paper mountains, an army of empty coffee cups, and the flickering screen of his laptop displaying the solitary bulwark of his creative struggle: one stubborn sentence. This single line of text, which he revised with the same unyielding dedication some might reserve for disarming a bomb, had been his nemesis and companion for five torturous years. “The sun erupted over the horizon like an overzealous teapot, splattering light in reckless abandon.”

This manifestation of his literary pursuit was a prison of his own meticulous design. Jack, a tall and lean figure with an unruly mop of dark brown hair, was once described as having the ‘laser focus of a cat watching a very philosophical mouse.’ He clocked every tick of the clock with a writer’s mania, each second a mocking reminder of his stagnant craft.

Jack’s friend Sarah, perceptive as always, dialed his number from her brightly lit kitchen, her intuition insisting that Jack was neck-deep in his cyclical ritual of create-delete-repeat. “Jack, it’s Friday night,” she said as soon as he picked up, her voice a blend of warmth and sternness. “And no sentence, no matter how perfectly wrought, should rob you of your twenties. Well, thirties now.”

Jack chuckled dryly, pushing his glasses back up the bridge of his nose—a nervous tic that peaked during these calls. “I’m close, Sarah. I can feel it,” he lied, the glow of his screen illuminating his tired blue eyes and the stark white walls of his small New York City apartment.

“You need a break,” Sarah insisted, her tone brooking no arguments. “A drink, some fresh air, and a reminder that there’s a world beyond the comma.”

Despite his protests, a small part of him—the part not wholly consumed by literary quests—knew she was right. Yet, he remained seated, chained to his chair by invisible shackles of his own obsessive quest for perfection.

As the night crept deeper, and the city’s cacophony dwindled to the occasional car horn or distant siren, Jack’s exhaustion waged war against his compulsion. In a moment born from equal parts desperation and weariness, he drafted an email to his publisher, Lila Harper. The subject line read, “Submission: One Sentence.” It was ludicrous, preposterous even, but the cursor blinked mockingly, and with a sigh heavier than the sum of all his discarded drafts, Jack clicked ‘send.’

His apartment, usually steeped in the tangible silence of solitary toil, hummed softly with the vibration of his sent email—a missive containing nothing more than a single, painstakingly crafted sentence and a shard of Jack’s soul. Drained, he rested his head against the cool surface of his desk, allowing the quiet darkness to envelop him, a welcomed respite from the bright tyranny of his screen.

Lila Harper, Jack’s publisher, had developed an almost mythical ability to spot potential in places others overlooked. When the one-sentence manuscript titled “One Sentence” landed in her inbox, it was with a blend of skepticism and curiosity that she opened the document. On her screen flashed Jack’s single line, standing solitary but bold. Lila leaned back in her high-backed leather chair, her office walls adorned with the first pages of bestselling novels, and allowed herself to contemplate the audacity of publishing a book that contained just one sentence.

Meanwhile, Jack woke to the harsh light of morning filtering through his blinds, casting lines across his face like a zebra’s stripes. The memory of what he’d done—the email sent in a fit of exhaustion—washed over him in a cold wave. He scrambled to his feet, his heart drumming a frenzied beat as he checked his email, half-hoping, half-dreading a response from Lila.

“Jack, let’s talk. - L,” the reply read, ominously short. Jack’s pulse quickened as he dialed Lila’s number, his finger hovering momentarily as he braced for the worst.

“Jack, this is quite the… minimalist approach,” Lila began, her voice a concoction of amusement and intrigue. “But it’s bold, and there’s something magnetic about this sentence. I want to run with it. Let’s publish it.”

The world seemed to tilt slightly under Jack’s feet. “Publish… one sentence? Just like that?”

“Yes, Jack,” Lila’s voice was firm, her decision made. “This could be revolutionary or it could flop spectacularly. But it’s a risk I’m willing to take.”

As the days spiraled into weeks, Jack found himself thrust into a reality he could have never anticipated. “One Sentence” was released digitally on LitLink, stirring a storm in literary circles and beyond. The sentence was projected onto billboards, shared across social platforms, and dissected in book clubs. It was less about the words themselves and more about the spaces between them, the echo of unsaid thoughts and unexplored narratives.

Critics hailed him as a pioneer of a new literary minimalism. “A brave exploration of literary constraint and the evocative power of simplicity,” one review read. Debates raged about the implications of minimalism in an age of information saturation. His one sentence had become a canvas, on which readers painted their diverse interpretations, finding meanings he had never envisioned.

Yet with his newfound fame came an unexpected burden. As Jack attended panels and interviews, he couldn’t shake the feeling of being a fraud. His imposter syndrome gnawed at him; his success felt unearned, an accolade for what he viewed as his greatest failure in verbosity.

Then, came the apex of his surreal journey: a live interview on a major talk show. The host, Carla Rivera, was known for her sharp wit and sharper interviews. As Jack sat across from her, under the glaring studio lights, he felt like an ant under a magnifying glass.

Carla’s voice snapped Jack back to reality. “So, Jack, your sentence—let’s see it up on the big screen,” she announced, and there it was, enlarged for all to scrutinize. “Tell us, was this an artistic choice or a writer’s block that paid off unusually well?”

Jack opened his mouth to respond, just as Carla pointed out something he had overlooked. “There’s a typo here, Jack. Did you see this before?”

Gasps filled the studio. Jack’s face turned a shade reminiscent of the red exit sign looming mockingly in his peripheral vision. His career, he was certain, was over.

In that moment of absolute mortification, Jack’s thoughts ran wild, each more catastrophic than the last. However, as he braced himself for a deluge of ridicule and scorn, something unexpected unfolded. Instead of derision, the audience erupted in murmurs of intrigue and curiosity. Tweets flashed across the screen, live reactions that speculated, not condemned, the presence of the typo.

“Perhaps it’s a deliberate flaw,” one viewer suggested, “a reflection on human imperfection in an increasingly digital, perfection-seeking world.”

“Or it symbolizes the raw, unfinished nature of life,” another chimed in, their words cascading through social media like a literary waterfall.

Carla, ever the provocateur, turned these speculations into a discussion. “So, Jack, is this typo an intentional stroke of genius or a happy accident?” Her eyes twinkled with a mix of challenge and amusement.

Jack swallowed, his mind racing. Transparency, he decided, was his only refuge. “To be completely honest,” he began, his voice steadier than he felt, “it wasn’t intentional. But that’s the beauty of art, isn’t it? It evolves with interpretation. Maybe it’s not just about the sentence I wrote but how it’s read and perceived.”

The response was unexpectedly positive. What could have been his downfall became, strangely, a testament to the organic, unpredictable nature of creative expression. The typo discussion only deepened the intrigue around “One Sentence,” propelling Jack’s minimalist experiment to legendary status.

In the weeks that followed, Jack returned to his previously solitary existence, though it was solitary no more. His inbox was flooded with invitations for guest lectures, book signings, and even proposals for adaptations of his sentence into various media. LitLink, the platform that first hosted his work, now featured a dedicated section where readers continued to debate, elaborate, and remix his sentence, each interpretation branching out into its own narrative vein.

As Jack observed this phenomenon, he found himself visiting LitLink not as a creator but as a spectator, watching as his single sentence took on a life far beyond his original, isolated intent. It was no longer just his; it had become a part of a larger, communal tapestry of creativity.

This realization sparked something within Jack—a shift from his introverted inclinations to a somewhat more open perspective on life and art. He began to understand that perhaps the value of one’s work lay not only in its original creation but in the ripples it created in the wider world.

One crisp autumn morning, Jack sat back at his cluttered desk, now somewhat less chaotic, reflecting on the wild journey his single sentence had spurred. Emboldened by this saga of unexpected outcomes, he started typing a new project. This time, he felt free from the shackles of perfectionism that had once bound him.

He typed, deleted, and retyped—not in search of the perfect sentence, but accepting each iteration as a step in his creative process; a process he now respected as inherently imperfect. Sarah popped in occasionally, her visits forming a rhythm to his newfound approach to work and life. They laughed more on these visits, the air around them lighter than it had been for years.

In a world keen on crisp endings and neat narratives, Jack’s story stood out as a reminder of life’s inherent messiness and the beauty found therein. His journey of obsessive precision had led him not to a flawless masterpiece, but to a living, breathing dialog between his intentions and the world’s interpretations.

As the sun set, painting his wall with hues of orange and pink, Jack leaned back, a content smile playing on his lips. His gaze settled on a fresh page, a new beginning marked not by the quest for perfection, but by an embrace of potential and possibility.

“The adventure,” Jack murmured as he started a new sentence, “begins anew.”

May 26, 2024 14:11

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60 comments

Cedar Barkwood
03:33 Jun 02, 2024

Wonderful as always! You bring wonderful emotion and sincerity to every writing piece. Writing about writing always make for such an interesting story!

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Jim LaFleur
10:33 Jun 02, 2024

Thank you so much, Cedar! Your words are incredibly encouraging.

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Helen A Smith
11:26 May 31, 2024

I like how this took off. The quest for perfection isn’t always good. The most interesting point you make is how words take on a life of their own, not necessarily the one intended by the writer. The way people interpret them differs. It’s how other people read words and stories that matters, something we have no control over. Really enjoyed.

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Jim LaFleur
12:37 May 31, 2024

Thank you, Helen! It’s fascinating how each reader brings their own world into the stories we write, giving them new dimensions. I’m thrilled you enjoyed it! 🌟

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Helen A Smith
12:39 May 31, 2024

It is. It’s been a deep learning curve for me. So long as somebody gets something from what we do, it makes it worthwhile.

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Jim LaFleur
11:29 Jun 03, 2024

Well put!

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Kristi Gott
13:29 May 29, 2024

Lol, I enjoyed this very much! What a fun story. Clever. Funny. Could be true in this social media world. Love it!

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Jim LaFleur
16:07 May 29, 2024

Thank you, Kristi! I truly appreciate your kind words.

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Trudy Jas
18:12 Aug 28, 2024

Hey Jim. I was wondering if you could drop me an email when you have a chance. trudyjas@gmail.com

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Story Time
05:06 Jun 10, 2024

All your work has been stellar, but this is my favorite to date. Engaging and enjoyable.

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Jim LaFleur
09:45 Jun 10, 2024

I greatly appreciate your kind words! It is great to know you enjoyed my story.

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McKade Kerr
14:19 Jun 09, 2024

Great story, as always! Congrats on being shortlisted, you definitely deserve it!

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Jim LaFleur
14:49 Jun 09, 2024

Thanks, McKade!

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Helen A Smith
12:36 Jun 09, 2024

Congratulations Jim 🎉

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Jim LaFleur
13:25 Jun 09, 2024

Thank you, Helen!

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PreCh_💌♍ CH
13:42 Jun 08, 2024

"perhaps the value of one’s work lay not only in its original creation but in the ripples it created in the wider world". "THE CONCEPT OF IMPACT " And that's exactly all that matters... Thanks for the reminder Jim, did hit home.

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Jim LaFleur
14:21 Jun 08, 2024

Thank you!

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Kim Olson
15:48 Jun 07, 2024

Congratulations! Well deserved honor! This was a very clever story!

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Jim LaFleur
16:25 Jun 07, 2024

Thank you, Kim!

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Trudy Jas
15:34 Jun 07, 2024

Way to go, Jim!

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Jim LaFleur
15:37 Jun 07, 2024

Thank you, Trudy!

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Giovanna Ramirez
17:36 Jun 05, 2024

Wow, a gorgeous story about the confinements and struggles of the writer's block as well as the artist's impostor syndrome. Sometimes embracing the reality of success is much more difficult than to do so with failure. This is an introspective battle many writers face and I am grateful for your spectacular portrayal of it. I will say this, though. Personally, I am not a fan of minimalist storytelling (stories that require 100 words or less) for the same reasons that Jack was not very connected with it at first. That's just a specific opinion...

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Jim LaFleur
17:58 Jun 05, 2024

Thank you, Giovanna, for your kind words and intelligent feedback! It's great to hear that the story resonated with you, and I appreciate your thoughts on minimalist storytelling. Your support means the world to me! 🌟

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Beverly Goldberg
08:05 Jun 04, 2024

Wonderful story--minimalist in a world with an overabundance of unworthy words, encapsulating minimal intelligence in the form of self-published tomes and ludicrous blogs. I love the story, but what is the typo in the sentence?

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Jim LaFleur
11:03 Jun 04, 2024

Thank you, Beverly, for your kind words! I’m thrilled you enjoyed the story.

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Marty B
23:09 Jun 03, 2024

A Piet Mondrian of the written word, and just like a true modernist painting, I have no idea what it means. 'but how it’s read and perceived.' So true for writing as well, (Who really likes James Joyce?) I hope this entry is well liked and received by the Judges! Good luck in the contest!

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Jim LaFleur
10:40 Jun 04, 2024

Thank you, Marty, for your kind words and encouragement!

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Kael Mans
22:20 Jun 03, 2024

I love the bit about the space between the words. There's so much more than what was put on the page and I think some authors agonize over not being able to spell it out even though it's already there in their work.

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Jim LaFleur
10:36 Jun 04, 2024

I couldn’t agree more! The unspoken elements of storytelling often resonate the deepest. It’s the art of leaving space for the reader’s imagination that truly brings a narrative to life. Thank you for sharing your insight!

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John McPhee
17:37 Jun 03, 2024

Great story! I feel better now and might be able to move on to my second sentence!

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Jim LaFleur
17:45 Jun 03, 2024

Thanks, John! Glad I could help you get to the next sentence. 😊

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Eddie Collins
14:19 Jun 03, 2024

As a writer, or creative in general, this one really hit home. I often find myself having vividly clear images in my head, but those thoughts are always hard to translate on paper as I imagine them.

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Jim LaFleur
16:02 Jun 03, 2024

It’s often a challenge to translate the vivid images in our minds to paper, but that’s also the beauty of the creative process. Keep exploring and experimenting with your ideas – the more you write, the easier it becomes to capture those fleeting thoughts. Your journey is an inspiration! Keep going!

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Denney Owen
13:37 Jun 02, 2024

Loved this! A beautiful story and paints very vivid images in my mind.

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Jim LaFleur
13:44 Jun 02, 2024

Thanks, Denney!

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Danielle LeBlanc
03:35 Jun 02, 2024

I thoroughly enjoyed this! For some reason, his sudden "rise to fame" reminded me of Nicholas Cage in "Dream Scenario". If this was a movie, that's how I would picture it stylistically :) Great work!

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Jim LaFleur
10:39 Jun 02, 2024

Thanks for the kind words, Danielle!

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Carol Stewart
00:42 Jun 02, 2024

Love this. Makes me want to find added meaning in that sentence... See what you've done now?

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Jim LaFleur
10:30 Jun 02, 2024

Carol, your enthusiasm is infectious! It’s amazing how a few words can open up a world of meaning.

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Devon Cano
20:46 Jun 01, 2024

This was great! It was impressive how much you got me to care about Jack and his journey in less than 3k words, and the overall message is one that I think all writers and creative types need to hear.

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Jim LaFleur
10:26 Jun 02, 2024

Thank you, Devon!

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