Jerry's Morning Train Ride

Jerry could not make himself zone out today; daily, he would board the 5:45 am commuter train into the city. There were eight stops before he reached his destination, and by the time of the fifth stop, the train would fill up to almost standing room only with commuters, with three more stops to go. Zoning out was a way Jerry handled unpleasant or tiring situations.

 Jerry sat at the back of the train car, as he usually did,

so he would not have to deal with the people getting on and off the

train. Today he regretted that decision because the train car was already crowded by stop number four, and they would be packed in like sardines by the time they get to his stop.

 By zoning out, he could take himself out of the uncomfortable, crowded train; it is much like an out-of-body experience. He has been able to do it most of his life, like being in the classroom in high school but taking himself outside for just a moment. Or waiting in line at the DMV to renew his driver’s license, he could take himself

out, making the waiting time not seem so long.

 For some reason, he could not separate himself from his surroundings today, making the train commute physically uncomfortable and mentally painful. He tried to find a blank wall to look at, only to land on the face of some unpleasant-looking man, which led him off on a tangent. The man must have been in his early to mid-forties, but his facial expressions were of a much older man. Jerry had heard the phrase, “Resting-mean face,” but never really thought much about it.  Jerry wondered why was this man’s face so unpleasant. Was he angry, or ill, or just an unpleasant person to be around?

Bringing himself back to his chore at hand, Jerry tried to find another spot on which to focus. This time his view was blocked by the face of an attractive young woman. The woman, a blond, must have been in her mid-twenties.  Her face has some very attractive features, such as a cute nose, great angular lines in excellent proportions of her cheek, and jawline. She also had a delightful expression on her face, an expression as if she remembered a fun or enjoyable event in her life. No matter how Jerry tried to look away, he kept coming back to her face; and wondering what it must be like in her world?

The conductor was making a round through the train, as he did

every two stops, looking for tickets he missed. Jerry was always surprised that the conductor would know the faces of people he had not gotten tickets from; after all, there were hundreds of people on the train, spread out through all of the cars. 

As the conductor came through on his latest go around, he

stopped at the attractive young woman and got her ticket. She gave him a charming smile as she handed over the ticket for the conductor to punch with the silver hold punch he carried. Jerry thought the conductor added an extra flip when he put the hole punch back in his vest pocket.

Jerry watched as the conductor made his way through the car and

noticed how people would smile at him and how he would return a friendly smile. Jerry thought to himself, “Now he has a pleasant face and a very nice smile.” As the conductor went by the unpleasant-looking man, the one Jerry watched earlier, there was no change in the man’s face, and the conductor did not seem to notice him. “Wow,” Jerry thought to himself, “The unpleasant man did not smile, and the conductor did not acknowledge him.”

Jerry found himself going back to the unpleasant man repeatedly,

and it seemed to upset him that the man had such an unpleasant face. As the overhead PA announced upcoming stops, Jerry noticed that the man never moved. As they approached Jerry’s stop, the man still sat there. For some reason, Jerry found this unpleasant man interesting, and he decided he would stay on the train to see where the man got off.

The train is now two stops beyond Jerry’s regular stop, and the train car is starting to empty, but yet the unpleasant man was still onboard. It was not until the commuters began to get off that Jerry’s curiosity paid off, but not as he expected. Jerry took a long look at the man and was surprised by what he saw.

For the first time, Jerry noticed that the train company had added a new poster inside a mat-black poster holder with a plexiglass front. Because of the angle, the lighting, and Jerry’s seating position, the display created an optical illusion and reflected Jerry’s face to him.  Jerry found himself in a state of disbelief; the whole time, the unpleasant man was just a reflection of his face.

Jerry got off at the next stop near the nature reserve and

allowed himself to reflect on what he had just experienced. He sat on an old train bench at the other end of the train depot, and as he looked across the field leading away from the train station, he first noticed the Shasta Daisies nearest the train tracks. The yellow eyes of the daisies surrounded by the white slender peddles reminded him of playing in the field of daisies as a child.

As he adjusted his vision to progress toward the mountains, next,

he saw the Butterfly Wildflowers, similar to the mixed package of North American Wildflowers his mom would plant around the house every spring. He was surprised to see the blue Forget Me Nots just beyond the wildflowers; he thought they were either earlier or later in the season than the wildflowers. He thought he would go and take a closer look.

As he started to get up, a hand touched him on his shoulder; he

heard someone say, “Sir, sir, sir is this your stop?” Jerry looked up; it

was the train conductor; sure enough, Jerry was at his stop. As Jerry got off the train, he thought to himself, "I really wanted to take a closer look at those flowers.