I know what you're thinking.

I Know What You’re Thinking

“George, while you were in the bathroom, we received a call from the university for you.”

“I hope that they don’t want to take my degree away after having a second look at the papers I wrote way back when.”

“Very funny George. This is serious. Apparently there is a group of scientists at the university who have made what they called a great discovery. So far no outsiders know about this discovery, and they want you to interview them and observe the effectiveness of what they have invented.”

“Wow. Well I did take a first year foundational course in science when I was there, and I got a good mark, the highest mark that year for me.”

“No George, they were apparently quite impressed with the article you wrote about the strengths and weaknesses of electric cars and self-propelling lawnmowers.”

“When do they want me?”

“As soon as you can get there. They are quite eager to let the world know what they have discovered.”

           George grabbed his camera and his recording device, and sprinted out of the office, into his car, and sped down to the university. Although it had been years since he was last on the campus, he found his way to the science building easily enough.

           He was greeted on the main floor by a university security officer, and told to take the elevator to the top floor. George was surprised by what he saw when he arrived at his destination and the elevator door opened. There were two police officers standing there, one of whom asked him whether his name was George Stanley, and did he have ID on him to prove that he was who he said he was.  He replied in the positive, took out his wallet and showed the officer his driver’s license. He was then escorted by the two officers into the room that apparently housed the experiment. Everyone in the room except for the officers, and, of course, himself, wore long white lab coats.

           The one who seemed to be the leader approached him and said, “Before we explain what it is that we have discovered, we are going to demonstrate it to you, with you as the research subject.”

           George began to feel a little nervous at this point. The leader then reassured him that this experiment would be painless. “I am just going to expose you to some electro-magnetic waves, that will pair up with the waves created by your brain. What we are going to show you is our lie detector. I am pretty sure that you are about to tell me that such a device has already been developed, but it really has not. What was previously invented is what we call a psychophysiological detector of deceptions, and it is not infallible. It is more an intimidator that it is a detector – no intimidation, no detection.

           For our invention to work we have to influence a person’s brainwaves with the waves from our machine. Now stand still. What I want you to do after I send the waves your way is to have you say what colour comes into your mind. If it is the same one that we have programmed our wave machine to send your way, then the two of you are connected. And we will be able to catch you in a lie.

           George was usually a big talker, with a sarcastic comment for every occasion. In this case he was more than a little stunned by the experience, and said nothing. When the device was turned on, he heard a kind of buzzing in his brain, that had lasted a few seconds, later to fade away. Then the scientist pointed the device at him again, and there was a different tone of buzzing, followed by the word ‘brown’ resounding in his head several times.

           “Okay, George, what was the colour?”

           After a few seconds, in which George seriously contemplated giving a wrong answer, he said “brown.”

           “Right! Now George, we are going to ask you a question, to which you can lie or tell the truth. We will tell you which one it is. George, are you married?”

           George said that he was, and the lead scientist correctly replied with “That’s a lie”. George just nodded his head in response.

           “We are now going to explain to you how it works. Let us know if you don’t understand. It is highly technical of course.”

           George then asked a question, “Are you not going to de-program me first?”

           The reply hit him like a hammer blow. 

           “Oh, we cannot do that. We tried, but could not find a way to do that, so we ended that part of the research. We feel that it would be relatively harmless to keep people programmed, as we will have absolute control of the devices. There will be no misuse.”

           George recorded the explanations of different aspects of the technology, so his complete attention was on what he was learning. He had the distinct impression that when he did not quite get what they were saying, they would repeat what they had said slowly and with more explanation. 

           When he was about to leave, the lead scientist asks him a peculiar question. “When are you going to be writing this piece?” He replied by telling the man that he always wrote his articles as soon as he arrived at work at nine o’clock in the morning, as he was a ‘morning person’. He gave his standard joke about that saying, “I never wrote anything intelligent in the afternoon.”

           After he had left and was driving back to the newspaper office, he wondered that the repetition of the explanations that he didn’t quite follow was the product of their ‘reading his mind’. He wondered how far he would have to go to be beyond their range. Or would there be no ‘beyond the range’. He knew from his regular reading of scientific journals that electro-magnetic waves were used to travel far into space. Travelling on earth should not  then pose a significant challenge to their use.

           When he got back to the newspaper office, he went straight away to talk to the editor to explain the problem he would have with writing an unbiased article on the research. The editor, whom George respected for his intelligence, particularly as it was demonstrated in his ability to write meaningful articles, presented him with a strategy that could resolve his problem.

           He followed it to the letter. The next morning, at precisely nine o’clock, he first wrote an article that was solidly supportive of the research, and the researchers. Minutes after he was finished the draft copy of this piece, he received a phone call from the lead researcher, who stated that he was sure that whatever he wrote would be fine with them. He should not worry about “getting it right”.

           Then, as the editor had suggested, he wrote what he truly felt, giving the article the title “Do you want to be programmed?” It had a powerful impact on the readers. The research ethics committee of the university soon declared that they would cut the funding of the project until such time as they found a way to deprogram those who were subjected to the waves. The committee asked George whether he wanted to be a research subject, as he was one of the very few who had been programmed, the others being university students who had badly needed the money. While he was apprehensive of the scientists ‘messing with my mind’, particularly after the critical article that he wrote, he agreed to participate as he wanted his brain purged of the effect of the waves. When he made his return to their research room, his first words were “I know what you’re thinking.” There was an initial silence. Then they laughed.