12 comments

Drama Fiction Romance

"What the hell are you doing here? Shouldn't you be with your other girlfriend or home with your wife?"


"I'm pretty sure this is exactly where I want to be. Can we take this conversation to your room? Unless you want the whole hotel to know your business."


"When we're alone in a hotel room there's never a conversation. You can lie to me right here in the stairwell. Isn't that why you're back?"


"Why are you doing this, Tina? Don't shut me out."


"I'm not the one shutting anyone out. You just left me here when I needed you the most. Did you even consider what I was going through? Good God, Jake, I cried all the way back from Quebec City over losing a baby I'd barely known about for three days and you couldn't spend one stinking night holding me."


"I wanted to. You know that. My life is such a mess right now I don't know what's up or down anymore. Can't we try again? I love you. Going home to my wife isn't going to change that. It's just going to make me want to be with you even more."


"Seems like a personal problem, Jake. Why don't you go hang out with Sandy? Maybe she'll make you feel better. You don't need me. I don't need you anymore either. The baby is gone and I could never depend on you anyway. Just leave me alone."


"Jesus, Tina. This isn't you. When did you get so cold?"


"Maybe after seven months of being lied to and hurt. Hurt can do that to a heart. Since you've been gone my life has been so much better. I'm getting ready to work in Quebec again with new shows and costumes and promo pictures. I have a new man in my life who hasn't lied to me so far."


"No, don't walk away. Please. God, what do I have to say to make you give me another chance? You don't need a new man. I never went anywhere. You never lost me."


"Jake, you dumped me off here at the hotel when you found out we couldn't have sex for the next six weeks. You dumped me and couldn't wait to get away. I know exactly what you wanted from me. That's not enough for me anymore. You can't just expect me to live whenever you're around. I need to feel alive all the time."


"I know that now. I do. I'm sorry for always being suspicious of you when I was away. You didn't deserve that from me. I'm leaving Bree for good this time and I've already talked with a lawyer. All I want is to be with you- all the time. Not just for sex. The last month has been hell thinking about what our lives could have been like if we hadn't had a miscarriage. It was everything I ever wanted. You're the only one I've ever wanted. Just open the door a crack for me."


"If I do you'll only break my heart again. You never do what you say you're going to do. I've come so far in healing from everything. I don't want to hurt anymore. If you really love me you'll let me move on and get over you."


"It's not that easy. Give me one night- just one night to try and convince you to come back to me. That's all I'll ask for. If it doesn't work for you I'm gone in the morning. Let me hold you one more time."


"Oh, God. I've lost my mind. Let's get out of this cold hallway. One night, Jake. One night, then I'm going to my new bookings and I'll be gone for good. Don't forget that I can disappear like no one you've ever met before."


"Trust me, I know how well you disappear. Let me talk with the front desk guy and I'll meet you at your room."


"Come on in. Did Jim give you any trouble about staying with me?"


"No. But he gave me a note from you telling me to leave you alone. Should I tear it up or save it for the morning when you decide what to do with me?"


"No, you can tear it up. I can always write you another. Tell me how you dealt with Bree about talking with a lawyer."


"She doesn't know yet. He's sending her a registered letter and that's going to be just the beginning. Her parents will have a shit fit. You know how you told me you thought my friend, Dan, had a thing for her? He's been coming around the house way too often lately. Sometimes when I'm not even there. When they look at each other it's like they have this secret. I think the baby belongs to Dan."


"I was seriously wondering about that by the way he talked about Bree when he came to the club that day. What about Sandy, Jake? Why were you still seeing her while you and I were together?"


"Sandy? Shit. She was a spare that I used to visit when Bree wasn't speaking to me. I didn't know how to cut things off with her, that's all."


"I'm not moving forward with you until all the past mess has been cleaned up. You don't get a spare. You either take your chances on loving me or you don't. But you don't get a spare. How would you feel if I kept Bill around as a spare, just in case you pissed me off?"


"Yeah, that wouldn't work."


"Exactly. I want to be treated the way you'd like to be treated, or it's not going to work. I'm not a toy you can put away when you're through playing with and expect me to just sit and wait until you want me again. You didn't just do that- you actually had the nerve to question me about what I was doing while you were away doing God knows what."


"I know. I know. It was wrong. You were probably the only woman I've ever known who didn't cheat on me and I treated you like a criminal. I'm so, so sorry. Tina, how can I make up for all my mistakes? Just tell me and I'll do whatever you want."


"First of all, you have two phone calls to make. I'll leave and give you privacy. We won't go any further unless you do that and tie up all your loose ends. If you really want me I have to be the only one. I'll be waiting for you in the hallway."


'"Hey, Sandy, yeah, babe. Uh, huh."'


'"Unintelligible"'


"Yeah, look, I'm calling to tell you I'm going to be seeing someone else. I'm sorry. I really am. But, this is a forever thing."'


'"Unintelligible."'


'" I know. I know. I never promised, Sandy. I never said that. Look. Just go out and find someone new. It's not going to be that hard, babe."'


'"Unintelligible!"'


"Look, I gotta go. You're a good kid, you'll be fine."'


"Shit."


'"Hey, Bree. No, I'm not coming home tonight. I'm going to come by soon and pick up my stuff."'


'"Unintelligible!"'


'"Yeah, Bree. I'm leaving. Maybe now you and the baby's father can get together."'


'"Unintelligible."'


'"What? You didn't think I knew? You and Dan, my good buddy. Go figure. Tell you what, Bree, you tell your folks to back off me with their legal team, and I won't tell the world their daughter is a slut who gets pregnant by her husband's best friend."'


'"Unintelligible."'


"That's what I thought you'd say. I'm just happy to be getting away from you finally. My lawyer will be sending you a letter this week. Just sign the fucking thing and let's both move on."'


"Tina, come on back. Done. I haven't felt this good in years. Honestly, it was harder dropping Sandy than Bree. You were right. Bree and Dan have been fucking right under my nose for years. Good. He can have the bitch."


"It doesn't surprise me. You gave them a lot of opportunities to get together. Now what?"


"Well, tell me what your schedule is for the next four weeks and we can start planning our first official road trip together. My schedule just got clear... Tina? Doll, what's wrong? Why the tears? I thought you'd be happy."


"Oh, my God. I'm, I'm happy. Surprised. Shocked. Did you really do all that?"


"Not only did I do that, it felt good. I feel good. I'm with who I want to be with and don't have to keep juggling my life around to spend time with you. Do you think you can handle me being around all the time?"


"Time will tell. Right now all I want is for you to hold me and remind me what your skin feels like on mine and how your warm breath on my face makes me melt. "




















February 19, 2023 22:29

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12 comments

Edina Lancz
21:43 Mar 02, 2023

I really liked the style of this piece and the way you turned one dialog into the next and back without the help of connecting texts. I was expecting some cruel twist at the end but the happy ending also fitted the story nicely.

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Jeanne Kiesinger
18:01 Mar 03, 2023

Hi! Thank you so much. It's sort of funny because when I first began writing dialogue scared me. This story helped me overcome that fear.

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Wally Schmidt
23:20 Feb 24, 2023

The dialogue here is great, which is the point of the prompt of course. I was wondering if the 'dialogue only' stories would feel lacking in setting and other details that are hard to squeeze in using only dialogue. I was so sure that after he had make the calls Tina was going to send him on his way, so the twist here was that she didn't. Loved how you developed the characters in this short space.

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Jeanne Kiesinger
01:01 Feb 26, 2023

LOL, the characters were living, breathing people, so it was easy. One of them at least is still alive and kicking.

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Viga Boland
21:55 Feb 24, 2023

Thoroughly enjoyed this. Very, very well done. Your handling of Dialogue was excellent and easy for reader to follow. As for Tina taking that cheating jerk back, well…Pffft! 😂 Wouldn’t trust him as far as the next hotel!

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Jeanne Kiesinger
22:40 Feb 24, 2023

Alas, but he had such big, brown, sincere eyes!

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Viga Boland
23:28 Feb 24, 2023

😂🤪😜

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Wendy Kaminski
22:02 Feb 21, 2023

This dialogue (love pentangle??) was a doozy, Jeanne, but you made it very easy to follow, and honestly I couldn't stop reading. The twists and turns, seriously making my head spin. From a practical viewpoint, I don't give Jake and Tina all that long lol, but it was absolutely an enjoyable Springer-style read!! :)

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Jeanne Kiesinger
22:33 Feb 21, 2023

Oh, dear, Jake and Tina were together for two rocky years and he left her hating men for the next ten years.

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Jeanne Kiesinger
22:33 Feb 21, 2023

Never trust a man with big brown eyes.

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Wendy Kaminski
22:35 Feb 21, 2023

Need that as a tattoo!

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Jeanne Kiesinger
01:02 Feb 26, 2023

😂

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