THE HEARTTHROB WHO LEFT

The Heartthrob Who Left.

The main door swung open and Amber scowled angrily. Did her sister have to open the door that wide as if it was the police department, letting in the coldest draught inside the already freezing apartment? She had come from work to discover that there was no firewood, she was too whacked to head down to the garage to chop, the heater needed fixing and their old house had no modern gadgets like air conditioners. It was the fireplace that always gave warmth to the house, whose heat had been diminishing over the past few years.

Some losses were just immense to get over. Instead of the whinge that was so obvious to ensue out of her twenty-one year old sister at the iciness and the gloom in the house, Amber watched her apologise for her recent action and then literally dump herself onto the nearest chair, eyes bulging with the newest gossip she could not wait to spill.

“Just spill it, Suzanne,” Amber scowled. “I have enough exertions right now to keep begging you to tell.”

Suzanne passed her that commiserative look. “You never have been in a good mood for years, sis. Years. I’m kind of thinking I have to adjust to that. But I think the story to your gloom might just about end.”

Amber snarled and focused on her book. They all thought she was a killjoy, an emotional hermit and unpredictable. She knew otherwise. If the whole world would stand against her, then she had no problems about that. She had lost a lot to care. But worst of all, she had lost the trust of almost everyone for good. Except her mother and sister and a few friends. Walking in town with a cloud of disdain and guilt hanging over her had completely erased all the hope she had of getting over the past.

The ghosts were very much real at times, but she tried her best to ignore. Forget? No! That was unforgettable, but at least it was ignorable.

And the mortifying part was losing their family home to the enemy. Their precious ranch. One moment they were a well to-do ranching family, the next truths began to surface one after the other, and before she could blink twice she was looking for a house to rent in town. This old wretched place that always had one problem after the other with all its structures.

Leaking roofs, falling gutters, overgrown field, tall hedges beyond her cutting reach. She did her best to maintain but it was too much for a woman with a bucket load of responsibilities. Sometimes, she wondered why she had stayed anyway. She just should have left town when disaster struck.

And now she was a twenty eight year-old-

“Guess who I saw,” Suzanne shrieked from across her. “You will not believe it, and I did not think he could recognise me, but he did.”

“I knew it was a man,” Amber shot irritably. “I hope you do not learn from mistakes. Be careful who you let too close, Suz. Not every guy knows what love is.” With that she stood up to make dinner plans. Her body needed time-out before she had to face another long tiresome day at the library sorting thousands of books.

“Wait!” her sister said persistently, and followed her to the kitchen. “C’mon sis, I am not that much of a boy-sick girl. Actually I thought you would be happy to know who is asking after you.”

Swivelling to face the younger woman, Amber put her obvious irritation in check before she lashed out all her stress on her sister. Suzanne was outgoing and she took life lightly sometimes, whereas she, on the other hand, had to work for fees , bills, rents, medical cover and food on the table. She needed her time alone and her need for space to be respected. Half the time, Suzanne did not realise that.

“Please, Suz, I just need to be alone. Can I at least cook in harmony without all this pestering,” she asked.

Shrugging, Suzanne stopped on the kitchen threshold. “Okay, but you might want to add a third plate. I invited our guest for dinner.”

“What?”

Her eyes rolling, Suzanne smiled. “Oh, now you are interested? Why? Because it is a dent on the budget? Do not worry, Amy, just one guest will not hurt.”

“Who is he?”

The sinister smile on Suzanne’s face told her that her question would not be answered.

“I will not tell. Let us just say, he’s a heartthrob, or that is what people say. He is rich, young, muscular and quite tall. Wear something nice, you do not want to disgrace yourself. Just promise me you will not throw him out.”

“Why should I not?” She was getting a bad feeling about all this. It better not be too much for her to handle, she did not want to risk herself being diagnosed as a hypertensive person or some other thing.

“Just promise me,” Suzanne insisted. “You will be surprised for sure, as he will be. He held me up for an hour asking after you.”

When Suzanne was determined not to say anything, Amber knew better than to convince her to say. So she just nodded but she could never promise anything. She never made promises now, she just ended up breaking all of them. Life had been hard on her but she still had to get back in the game even if it meant going against some promises. Caring was something that was leaking out of her faster than she was breathing. It was dangerous but what could she do? She was already in the town’s black book for cruelty and unruly behaviour. She was made an example of bad examples by other parents to their children. Talk about having dignity, or a little pride at least. She was just her, a shunned woman that anyone would pick on if they liked.

Taking the celery from the vegetable rack, she reminded herself that she was not only orphaned, disinherited and unloved, but also not gainfully employed, living on the meager remains of their parents’ fortune. The car, maybe. Nothing else.

And the deepest loss would forever be shut. She did not open that door anymore.

Nearly an hour later she had made ready and waited, rather curiously for the visitor. When a car pulled up the driveway she did not go to check. Suzanne rushed to open the door and she just leaned on the dining room doorpost and waited. Suzanne was cackling, rather giggling stupidly- the child still needed some tutoring on self-control before things swept out of hand. She was too trusting, too innocent.

“Let me take your coat,” Suzanne offered and the visitor grunted a yielding grunt.

“This house looks mighty ancient, Suz,” the man was saying in the hallway. For a split second she thought she recognized the voice, then dismissed the thought.

“Yeah, Amber has a lot of responsibilities to give it the care it needs. Plus it is not like we own it, anyway. We are renting.”

There was a grunt of dissatisfaction from the visitor. “This is not your life, though. Anyway, I hope we will remedy that.”

“Oh, really,” Suzanne answered. “Dining is this way. Nervous?”

“Very,” he said with a crooked laugh. “She must have changed.”

There was a touch of sadness in the tone of her sister’s voice. “Too bad for the worst. It has been tough on her and it hurts me each day to know that I cannot help. I do not know how to.”

There was no forthcoming response from the man, and any moment they would be in the dining room. Amber closed her eyes and took a deep breath. This was not going to be good, she knew.

The seconds seemed to halt and stare as she came face to face with not the last person she wanted to meet, but someone she never wanted to meet in ten lifetimes, even never in forever. As if suddenly let go from where they had been imprisoned, memories of their last meeting came over her like a flood and she failed to gasp, even breath for a couple of seconds. He too, had the same regret in his eyes the way he had had when he left her after she had sacrificed all for him. He looked well, his denim shirt and trousers screamed affluence, and his shoes just shone and made her so jealous of how life had turned out to be. To make matters worse, she remembered that he owned their ranch now. Revenge on her. For a crime she did not commit, even though the evidence said she had.

This was going to end up in her breaking china in a rage, or breaking his neck. Every cell in her body was screaming at her to slap him enough to uproot several teeth, but she would not relent. She had been broken once but no more. True, she was a shattered woman and it was so evident, but she was not going to be a tool or a punch bag. If he had come to haunt her, then he was in for a deplorable surprise.

“Drew? Come to cool down your ire by making me a punch bag and getting to me through my sister?” she asked as coldly as she could.

He stood still and watched her. Said nothing. Oh, she thought, he wants to play Mr Good. That would never work.

Drew had known how angry she would be. It was unforgivable to leave a woman that way, but he had been very gullible then, and now he intended to make amends. He could not afford to look elsewhere when everywhere he turned it was her tear covered face begging him to just listen and give her a chance. He would have to endure her torments and insults until the fire died out of her. But if there was something he knew well, it was the fact that he was not backing off until he won her again.

“Amber?”

Swiftly turning to her sister, she gestured to the table. “Young lady, before I lose it, kindly dish up for yourself and go to your room. You will only be allowed here when I say so.”

Suzanne blinked. “Amy, what is going on?”

“None of your business. Since you regard your visitor as a saint, it is healthy for you to leave before you hear some things which may shatter your elevated opinions of him. If you know better than to test my patience, leave!”

The expression on Drew’s face made it clear that he did not know she had become this vile and bitter. He watched as Suzanne fidgeted with spoons and a plate before she gave up and simply left the room.

There was an awkward moment of silence before she said, “So, enemy, you took your pound of flesh, what more do you want?” Amber fought hard to keep the rage and soreness out of her voice. She had to be sturdy. If not for herself, for Suzanne.

He tried to gesture but she stopped him. “If you must know, Drew Hamilton, I have no time to hear whatever rubbish you have come to tell me.”

He cleared his throat. “I know. I should have trusted you.”

“But you did not. And that is all that matters.”

“Can you give me a chance to right these misconceptions, Amy?” he said a little pleadingly. Amber knew better. The man was a good actor. He would never see her as anything but a murderer, he only wanted her to suffer more directly at his hand. Even though she no longer had a heart he could win to break, he was adept at so much more.

Her composure snapped at his bogus act. “Misconceptions? Why don’t you just stick to your belief that I had an abortion and hate me as much as you want? Or how about you just accept that you won and stop reappearing like this? You said you would fight for me, I fell for it, forfeited everything, endured beatings by my father and chose you over my family. And when I was done and got a miscarriage you fell for all the abortion accusations at the drop of a hat. Call that a betrayal, you are a traitor. No matter how I tried to explain you just did not listen. Or maybe you wanted the baby and the thing you cared about was gone. It was not easy to be in mischief the way I did and I admit through my foolishness and all the drinking I was very careless about my health. But I loved my baby and I gave up all the alcohol to keep her healthy. I flushed all the pills in my lockers for my baby. I loved her, and when I lost her I thought you would man up, but what did you do? Run as far away as you could. Without parents, my baby, the man I loved added insult to injury and left me a laughing stock in the district. And bought my ranch, kicked me out through clever indirect means. You are really full of guts, Drew, because you have the nerve to face me with sweet tongues again? Pray you do not leave here in an ambulance.”

She could feel herself shaking all over, the hurt had been held up too long and it just wanted to be let out. She tried her best to keep them in check, but failed. Howling, she collapsed to the floor and cried her heart out. Cried for all the times she had not cried. For the pain of watching him go and not being able to change his mind.

Drew knew that if he went close to her, the next thing for him was the ICU at the nearest hospital. Lowering onto the chair next to him, he let her cry herself out until all the energy simply zapped out of her, and she could not say a word or cry some more.

“Your father sent me away, Amber.” He had to say it. “He gave me conditions I could not go against. He would marry you to a man you did not want and send you to an abortion clinic if I stayed. I could not watch you getting married to someone else and when you miscarried after our fight it just fit to believe you had decided to destroy us. You said I was unfit for you and did not have money and it was not worth it. I found abortion documents in your room, filled out with signatures. I thought it was true and I was too angry to listen. But later I did my research and found out the truth, I knew I should have listened. Amber, I am not asking for love, or forgiveness, I am asking just to give you the least I can to at least take the weight off our shoulders. That is why I bought the ranch. Your parents were into debt and I wanted you to at least be able someday to have the place that brought a smile to your face in your ownership again. I’m giving you back the ranch.”

“I do not want it,” she snapped.

“That is not a request, I am simply giving you back what is yours. If I start talking about love, you will never believe me so I will pay the price. I will never love anyone better than I loved you, but I was blinded by my insecurities and maybe, I just will have to live it.”

“Or take the risk and both of you stop this whole sickening trend of hatred!” Suzanne shouted from the door. The young girl was crying. “How do you think it makes me feel? Huh, Amber? I hear you crying in your room, I tolerate your unjust treatment and mood swings and unbearable torture because you love him and just cannot admit it, yet you know it! You are killing me right now because you are cowards!”

Amber sat up and looked at her sister, then at Drew. He looked straight at her, and from his wet eyes, she saw the fierce fondness and passion- the love she had known six years ago. It was as if the veneer of rage had been pulled away like a curtain. She wanted to smash him but she could not imagine a life excluding him bringing her any happiness. Considering the conditions, he had been saving her and himself some hurt while creating more hurt. He had been poor and despised and of course, her father had been capable of doing what he said he would. So whose fault was it?

Both of them.

“Are you really that dumb to be separated by the threats of people who are dead and a town which is believing lies?” Suzanne asked painfully. “And here I am looking up to you for direction and you-

Suzanne left her statement halfway because Amber found herself leaping up and falling towards Drew, who caught her before she fell and held her tight. If love could conquer all things, surely theirs could. She had a chance to right a lot of wrongs and this time, without opposition. She was not passing that up.

“Amber,” he groaned repeatedly. “My Amber.” Tucking her head against his shoulder, he held her tight. He was not going to let her go, ever.

If there was a better feeling in the world, it was finally seeing Amber’s rage vanishing, leaving the fierce love she had for him totally consuming her.

He was not messing up ever again.

This chance was one he was maximizing. “Marry me,” he whispered.

“Yes,” she answered over and over again.

Suzanne sat on the table and began to say grace.