(Pink)y Promise

Submitted into Contest #53 in response to: Write a story that begins with someone's popsicle melting.... view prompt

311 comments

General

Pink was my favourite colour.


It looked innocent, yet sweet. Cute, yet cheerful.


Just like me back in the last year of junior high school. The me who caught the eyes of a boy in grey-coloured uniform. 


The boy was standing at the gate when I came to hand in some documents to enroll in the high school of my choice. When our eyes met, I smiled at him and passed by.


And it seemed my smile made him forget about the popsicle in his hands which started to melt under the sun, as his eyes followed me into the administration room.


The same boy who tried to get close to me throughout the first year of high school. 


The same boy who brought me red roses, asking me to be his girlfriend when I turned eighteen.


---


Pink was the colour of his ears, whenever he felt pressured.


That was one of his habits, which I noticed after being his girlfriend for two weeks. Another one of his habits was to avoid looking at people directly when he uttered a lie.


He was smart. He ranked third in class, while I was third from the bottom. But that didn’t bother him; he taught me everything I needed for the exams without a single complaint.


He was quite sporty too. He was part of the basketball team which represents our school to competitions. Continuously adding three points to the team, he contributed a lot to winning each game. And for that, I was proud to be his girlfriend.


He was also willing to spend time with me. We always had our lunch break together; he liked it better than being with his friends. And for that, I felt very treasured by him.


More importantly, he was well-liked by my parents.


“Kevin has a good attitude and looks trustworthy,” my dad said.


“Kevin is quite handsome, you know. And he loves you so much too. What more is there to ask for?” my mother commented.


They liked him so much, to the point that they allowed him to stay at the house when they were away.


“Take care of Bella for this weekend, okay, Kevin?”


With him agreeing to the request, that weekend turned out to be very memorable. 


We ordered pizzas, ate it in my bedroom, and didn't even think about washing the dishes. We played video games competitively against each other. And just when we grew tired of playing, we switched on the TV and began to watch a romance movie that I’d been wanting to see.


The movie led us to share our first kiss. And a couple more after that.


The kisses led me to lay on my back, with him whispering, “Can I?”


It was wrong; I knew it inside my heart. But that wasn’t enough to stop me from nodding my head. And a nod was all it took for him to start undoing the buttons of my blouse, unbuckling his belt.


It was the day I turned into an adult. It was hurting me, but I didn’t mind it; I did it for the sake of love. Yes, for love. For his fingertips that caress my chest. For the gentle touches of his hands on my hips. For the softness of his lips that kissed me again and again.


The same love that made me utter, “I gave you my first, so you have to take responsibility for it.”


The same love that led me to whisper, “Listen to me. Fulfil my request. Never look at other girls. And don’t even think of breaking up with me. Be with me forever until the day I die,” I paused, looked directly at his eyes.


“Pinky promise?” I stretched my hands toward him.


“Pinky promise,” he answered, intertwining his finger with mine as he shifted his gaze to the ceiling.


And I could see his ears turned pink.


---


Pink was the colour of my lip balm.


The one on my lips when he lovingly spoonfed me at the cafeteria. The same time when I realized someone was staring at us.


The one I put on when we were studying together at the library. The same time when I noticed a person who awkwardly hid her face when I turned my head towards the table behind me.


The one I had on my lips when I cheered on my one and only boyfriend during his basketball practice. The same time when I found out the green-eyed girl who had been following us, adoring Kevin from the other side of the court.


The same one on my pouted lips when I confronted him about this stalker. The same one on my smiling face when he agreed to bring me to the observatory, as I requested; his way to apologize to me. The same one I used as we argued in the car that evening.


“You don’t seem to enjoy this trip,” I opened the talk as I looked at his sour expression.


“No, I enjoy it,” he replied weakly, with his eyes fixed on the road, not batting an eye towards me.


“I think you're lying. You don’t like it because I force this into you, isn’t it?”


“No, no. I am fine.” Again, he didn’t look at me when he answered.


“You keep lying to me. It seems you don’t love me anymore.”


“What? No, I still love you.” Another denial without a glance.


“Then say it while looking at me.”


He sighed out loud just before answering, “I’m driving, Bella. I can’t do that!”


“Then, I take it as you don’t love me anymore. Stop the car, I don’t want to have a romantic stargazing picnic with someone who doesn’t love me,” I made a declaration out of anger. My hands reached to unbuckle the seatbelt.


I could hear him clicking his tongue at my request. I could see his ears turned hot pink as he let out a sigh. “Okay, fine,” he finally turned his head, looking directly at my eyes. “I love you.”


I smiled upon his sentence, feeling satisfied. As I gazed at his eyes, I could see the sky turned orange thanks to the gradually setting sun. 


“I love you too. Now, look at the view behind you, Kevin!” I pointed outside the windows. His eyes followed my finger, admiring the sunset for a few seconds.


And when our eyes returned to the road, our car had already been in the lane for reversed direction, where a teal-coloured truck sounded its horn, driving towards us.


And I could tell he desperately turned the steering wheel, wished it could bring us back to the correct lane, avoiding the truck. But instead, we drove past the railing.


And I could remember the split second when my body floated above the seat. The moment when airbag popped and created a painful ringing on my ears. The same moment when my body flew forward, breaking through the front glass, as I cursed my stupidity to unbuckle the seat belt.


And I remembered the deep dark forest below as I descended to the bottom of the cliff along with the car. Me, who screamed out of sharp pain from the glass cuts. Me, who screamed out of fear, knowing very well that it would be the day I die. Me, who landed on my back, experiencing immeasurable pain from the impact, with warm liquid flowing out from the back of my head.


And as I looked at the sunset for the last time, I recalled all the days that I’ve spent with him. 


The happy times that we spent together, the not-so-happy moments where we argued with each other.


The pleasure of sharing our first kiss, the weekend when we shared our first time.


The pinky promise we made with each other.


And I gradually closed my eyes with pain all over my body.

August 06, 2020 09:39

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311 comments

I love your use of color in this story, it makes me feel the emotion running throughout it. What a sweet and sad story. I’m glad that I read this. This was amazing. Great job!😁

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Deborah Angevin
11:40 Aug 06, 2020

Thank you for reading, Melony! :D

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Akshat .
11:31 Aug 06, 2020

Very awesome Deborah! The ending is so sad! Nice way to start the story off! Keep writing! (And thanks for following me :) )

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Deborah Angevin
11:41 Aug 06, 2020

Thank you for reading, Akshat! Really appreciate it! :D

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Akshat .
11:43 Aug 06, 2020

You're welcome! :) Always happy to read anyone's stories 🙂

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Ryan Lieb
16:14 Aug 08, 2020

Very nice. It's a very adult story, but tasteful, and I like the sharp turn it takes. It's not quite the fairy-tale love that it seems to be at first. Well done!

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Read this, and I can see you're switching POVs! I loved it!!!!

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Deborah Angevin
10:49 Jun 25, 2021

Yup, that is exactly what I intended!

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Camilla Huffman
17:52 Aug 08, 2020

I really enjoyed this story, the descriptions, the harshness of the ending, the way that we don't really know for sure what happened to either of the characters...very nicely done for sure. I wish you'd have elaborated a bit on the other girl but other than that I really enjoyed the read.

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Deborah Angevin
10:55 Aug 09, 2020

Thank you for reading, Camilla! I didn't put much information about the other girl since I just wrote about her in my previous submission, "A Very, Very Dark Green" (yes, it is related to this story; feel free to check it out if you are interested :D)

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Camilla Huffman
18:01 Aug 09, 2020

I'll be sure to go check it out :)

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Roshna Rusiniya
08:12 Aug 12, 2020

Beautiful descriptions. I loved how you used ‘ pink’. Great story!

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Deborah Angevin
14:30 Aug 13, 2020

Thank you for your kind words, Roshna! :D

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Roshna Rusiniya
15:00 Aug 13, 2020

You are welcome dear. When you have time, have a look at mine too. Thanks!

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Deborah Angevin
23:23 Aug 13, 2020

Sure will do, Roshna! :D

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Amogh Kasat
04:07 Aug 10, 2020

It's a really good story! You have used colour in the story. The ending was sad. It's really a good story.

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Deborah Angevin
08:24 Aug 10, 2020

Thank you for reading and enjoying it :D

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Suzanne Urowitz
12:55 Aug 09, 2020

Looks like it would make a great poem.

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Deborah Angevin
08:25 Aug 10, 2020

Thank you, Suzanne :D

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Eden Conner
18:05 Aug 08, 2020

Incredible story!! I loved the repetition.

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Deborah Angevin
10:53 Aug 09, 2020

Thank you for reading, Eden!

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A K Woodhouse
08:30 Aug 10, 2020

Big fan of the repetition here too. Gave it a rhythm and tied the story together.

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Omani Saleem
08:39 Aug 08, 2020

the story was delivered with the same vibrant emotion as the color pink. i loved it. i'm not sure if anyone else asked this but, who was the stalker?

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Deborah Angevin
10:26 Aug 08, 2020

Hi Omani, more info on the stalker is actually on the other story, "A Very, Very Dark Green" :D

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Omani Saleem
21:58 Aug 08, 2020

Thank you 😊.

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17:24 Aug 06, 2020

That is beautiful style of writing and its so unique! everything flowed with the color pink and it felt really aesthetic, I really enjoyed the story too it was really bittersweet and the ending was sad but I loved it! Good job! - Ugochi✨*~

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Deborah Angevin
22:22 Aug 06, 2020

I was worried about the flow being too rushed at the end (I don't want to repeat the bits that I covered in previous stories too much), so I'm glad that you mentioned about it!

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00:49 Aug 07, 2020

Oh the flow was completely fine. And of course😊

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Scout Tahoe
16:27 Aug 06, 2020

Hi Deborah--here as promised! I am in wonder at how you can write a short story but make me feel the characters and their pain through it. Repetition can be annoying sometimes, but it wasn't in your writing. You separated your uses of the word 'pink' and its meaning to the characters so that it didn't become irritating. Great job! Stay safe and keep writing, -Scout

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Deborah Angevin
22:24 Aug 06, 2020

Thank you for reading it, Scout. Glad that I'm not annoying you with the repetition (for some reason, I like to write it that way!)

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Scout Tahoe
00:06 Aug 07, 2020

Repetition is fun, and makes readers want to read more. :)

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Amany Sayed
13:04 Aug 06, 2020

Oh my god, how sad! I don't know how you manage to keep coming back to these characters, I have like 3 stories lined up for part twos now. Anyway, as always, the way you weaved color throughout is awesome, and I love the story! Great job!

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Deborah Angevin
22:35 Aug 06, 2020

Hahaha, nowadays my mind just goes back to these characters before building a new world! Thank you for reading!

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Nyx :)
19:01 May 18, 2021

It really good!

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Deborah Angevin
10:47 Jun 25, 2021

Thanks! :D

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Adhena Madhu
08:44 Aug 20, 2020

It's a great story! You might have heard this a hundred times now but I loved how you used the colour! Keep writing😊

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Deborah Angevin
13:00 Aug 21, 2020

Thank you for checking the story out, Adhena! I'm glad you enjoyed the colour inclusion in the story :D

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April Summers
20:29 Aug 19, 2020

This hurt so much! Took me a while to realize I was reading from Bella's perspective and it's incredible how all the stories are linked together. Love the usage of color imagery and all the detail. Great job Deborah and keep it up! :D

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Deborah Angevin
13:01 Aug 21, 2020

Glad that you enjoyed it, April! Thank you for reading the story :D

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21:24 Aug 17, 2020

Nice!!!

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Lady Gordons
03:21 Aug 17, 2020

This is really nice and enjoyable, I love the suprising ending!

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07:19 Aug 13, 2020

This story grips you from the first sentence. Keep writing!

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Deborah Angevin
14:27 Aug 13, 2020

Thank you for reading it, Josephine :D

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Tvisha Yerra
03:29 Aug 13, 2020

Another addition to the series! Love it! It's beautiful. :')

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Deborah Angevin
14:27 Aug 13, 2020

Thank you for enjoying it, Tvisha! :D

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