Within the Wall

I don't recall the precise moment I was led into this predicament. What was now had turned into what was then, my reminiscent world has turned into an undefined murk of a shadow. When was it? When I hindered the seeing of this world: my home, my work, the outdoors, all of it. Was the sky always accompanied by clouds? The setting of the sun, what color was it? Did grass have a particular shape? Was my inquisitive manner ever so constant? When did I begin these probes? And why do I hear the voices of others?

Now, do not think of me as absurd. The voices truly do belong to people, as far as I can tell with their deafened speech. Perhaps they linger in a closed off place of some sorts. It is only an assumption, I undoubtedly have no real idea of where the voices could be coming from. For the world I dwell in; is dark. Dark as in pitch black, as in I am blind in it. Whether I close or open my eyes, it is all the same. It wasn't always so tenebrific. As I had recalled before, I saw color once. 

I confess it is rather tiresome. The place I reside, it's not familiar to me. I have nostalgia for this 'nature' I dream about. I fantasize about my 'home'. Never have I had delight in a sunless scene. So what led me here? I know for certain; I would have never visited voluntarily. The most I have done is talk in this never-ending mind of mine, and even that can be tiring, so I cease to think. Alas, I can never go on without thinking, or I'll forget how to. The emptiness can be more alluring than others think it can be. This vast black space is always here. It hugs me with silent comfort. 

The voices. It was timeless before they appeared. It was so sudden, I thought they had materialized, considering my solitary state. I admit I felt tremendous blissfulness, I would rather feel accompanied than see the light again. You would be surprised at how much satisfaction one gets upon hearing the simple steps of feet, or the most enjoyment of listening to conversations. Oh have I yearned for something, anything, that rebels against this unending night. 

So this began; my hearing of voices. There were doubts from time after time, that the sounds are not legitimate. In the end it did not matter, I would be content either way. It is not as if I abhor engaging, I precisely can not. I have neglected my speech for such a time that I have forgotten how to speak. I also do not know of their whereabouts. I can not pursue, for I have forgotten how to walk. Walk. I don't think I have legs...absurd! Perhaps I do, but I do not see them. 

If someone had challenged me; and questioned the types of conversations I was listening upon, I would say, 'an array!' It was the arguments I cherished, mainly because it fancies my hearing. I have learned of these voices, one named Will and another named Alm. They seem to have a fondness for another, or that the very least get along. It wasn’t until recent events they had argued about money. Money...ah yes, I remember. Something about retrieving deodorizer and a pest specialist. I pity my dear friends, it seems they are in a predicament, as am I.

 I have forgotten how troublesome the land of light was. These voices reminded 

me. Everyday something had struck down and soiled my time, now I only have peace. Quite the irony I believe. I remember fighting for peace constantly, and now there is no struggle at all. If I am mistaken, I feel as if I am waiting on something, on somebody. Will they find me? Or shall I remain in this endless and starless daze. How would I be found? I feel as if I am blocked by a wall. Nothing comes through and nothing comes out. How long has it been? I...can not recall.

Oh! But it is a joyous day, my ears have gathered a sound. My friends have come to visit. So I stopped thinking, and listened. 

A distant door swings open from a twist of a nob. Heavy yet quiet footsteps tred on the floor. The floor is nowhere soft, each step is audible, even on tip toe. The smack of something hits another surface. Then a creek from something that now carries weight. 

"Work never seems to end…" an airy voice sighs. It's Will. 

The continuous tapping or clicking can be heard. A random sound that continues then stops, continues, stops, then continues once more. 

The sound is rather calming, even if it is unbeknownst to me. The sound lasts for a long time. I even like the random grumblings that come from Will. Whatever it is he doesn't seem to like it, but he does it for such a time! He is confusing. 

The soft yet loud footsteps enter the room, "How long have you been at that?" It’s Alm's voice. 

"Oh, give me a few more minutes and I'll be there," says Will.

Steps slowly pace around the room, some sounding stronger than others, and some sounding distant. "Well, the two specialists are here, I'm giving you a heads up. So be ready." Alm says before stepping away from my ears. 

Will stops, a shutting sound can be heard. The rolling of something gets pushed and heavy steps move then stop. Two unidentified walking patterns are headed in my radar, both walk similarly and both walk heavier than Will. Was it guests? I can feel Alm's footsteps accompanied them. 

"What's the problem ma'am?"

"My fiancé and I have been living here for about 9 months now, we have had smell problems before. We thought it could be a dead rat. So we waited 3 weeks and the smell was gone, but then 3 months later another smell appeared! We waited again and there was another smell. We thought it was best we'd have it checked," Alm says.   

"Why it is nearly next year! Why'd you wait till then to call us?"

"Look can you help us or not?" Will says.

A grunt was made and the walking of footsteps became louder and louder until a bang ringed my ears. "Here," says Alm. 

Two heavy footfalls feel like an earthquake. Then a cutting sound? I am not sure, but it is loud, it is right by my ear.

"Urgh! I can smell it already!" Complains Alm. "It's like animals loving dying here!" Cut cut cut.

The sound of...sawing, that's the word, stops. 

"That don't smell like an animal"

"How..how long has this been happening?"

It is quiet for some time. "Well..this happens every 3 months like I said..but we 

haven't decided to call until the new year was over" Alm speaks slowly. The sound of sawing began again, but it became frantic and louder. Saw saw saw. 

Until it stops, the cutting, the sawing. 

It's strange..I don't understand. I have waited here, for more than a year? It felt 

longer. And yet my light was restored within an instant. I thought my reunion would be grander than this, my friends, guests. Why do you stare wide-eyed at me? Be pleased, for you have found me. You found me.