The Gift in Disguise

“Oh! I hadn’t thought about who to leave things to in my Will. Everything just goes to my children”

It wasn’t meant as a hurtful statement but hurt it does. I never planned to be alone with no children, no part of me to live on beyond my lifetime. The branch that I sat upon on the family tree would hold me and nobody else. It was a little depressing when I thought of my nieces and nephews drawing their family trees in the future. I would hope that one might have some compassion for my empty branch. Maybe they will add my dog on the branch with me. No matter. My siblings get up a leave after their obligation of drinks after my concert and I head home.

Later that evening I light some candles and sit with my Will booklet from the lawyers. What do I leave to whom? What do I want to happen when I am not here? It feels morbid to be thinking of this. I pour myself a glass of red wine.

No one really needs anything from me, the rest of my family is doing just fine. So, I have to decide what people might want. I could leave my piano to my nieces…that would get under my sister’s skin! Then I would forever be bothering her with music and perhaps even plant the seed in my niece’s minds that being an artist is a legitimate career choice! Oh, how that would drive my sister wild. She would curse me in my grave for that. I giggle at the thought.

Speaking of graves…I do not really wish to have one. We have a family plot which has a space for me. I have always been a free spirit though and being stuck in the ground, even if it is only the body that has served to contain who I am all these years, just seems like a sad end. I could put cremation in my will. My parents are no longer here to dispute it. Another shock for my siblings after I am gone!

I should explain here. I am not dying. I do not plan to die any time soon. I am just being prepared in case. I do love my family and am well-loved in return. I do not wish to write my will out of spite to them, not really. I have always been the odd one out and I feel this should be the way I exit the world too. My siblings all have “proper” jobs. I have always been an “artsy” type. That is what they called me. Despite being a professional and well-regarded musician, albeit not a rich one, I never measured up to their standards. Being a musician was like being Peter Pan and never growing up. Never being serious about life. If only they knew the hours, blood, sweat and tears that being an artist takes! I guess they never really understood me. Not that they weren’t proud in their way. They just put me in a box. What a silly thought to have whilst pondering my Will!

I am decided. I will be cremated and my nieces and nephews can decide where I should be scattered. I guess, for this, I will need to appease my siblings in the next section. Who to make the executor of my Will...I am closer with my oldest sister however my brother would not approve of her as the executor. They would argue about it, I am sure. I sit and ponder on this for ten minutes. I then decide that I will be dead and so will not need to deal with the fallout anyway. Jean, my oldest sister’s name, is written down in the square.

I continue reading through the questions and it seems there will be no appeasing everyone. An idea starts to bloom in my mind. An idea to bring the family together when I am no longer here. It is usually my performances or my birthdays that bring us all together. I demand it, so it happens. Without me here, would they still meet? Would they still act like a family?

My family contains four siblings. An elder brother, an elder sister and a younger sister. My brother and elder sister both have boys. My younger sister has two daughters.

So, my idea? Well, it is this. I write down:

Grand piano to my nieces.

Sheet music to my brother.

Piano cover to my older sister.

Record player to my younger sister.

12” Record collection to my older sister.

7” Record collection to my brother.

Do you get the idea? I am only giving each of them a part of what they need. Sure they could get music or records from anywhere but I know when this is read out to them that they will understand my meaning. They will be incredibly annoyed, beyond annoyed. In fact, I can see my brother cursing me for my skittish ways. They will not like it at first and then it will click. It will click to them as to what my plan is. Then they will smile and cry and commit at least for a while to spending Sunday afternoons together making music and being a family. They will miss me in those moments but little do they know that I will be there. I will be in all those moments.

I complete the rest of my Will leaving jewellery and other items to the family and friends. I feel proud of my decision even though it will not be well received at first. I know that I can bring them together when I am gone. They will need each other. That is something we artists know. You need to feel connected. The best connector I know of is music. When I am gone, they will need it more than I. I scan the papers and attach them to an email to the lawyer. I smile as I hit send.