Stupid Apocalypse

MY SUPER AWESOME FANTASTIC PLAN

Stupid apocalypse. Ruined all my plans. It was simple. I was going to finish high school, the last episode of Cobra Kai and run away. Maybe not exactly run. I hadn't really decided my method of transportation but whatever it was it would help me get away. Why? Cause all my parents really cared about was about me doing stuff, not about me. "Levi, eat your veggies". "Levi, no more dessert". "Levi, don't eat pizza or you'll get fat. Eat veggies". Levi this, Levi that. Now you get why I wanted to run away? I was only five days away from my super awesome fantastic plan of running away from everything I knew but the police started coming to our house with guns and stuff. I'm not really sure what they were doing but my wicked parents seemed really worried. I'm sure it was all their fault in the first place. They did something stupid and now they have to face something stupid. Stupid, stupid, stupid.

WHERE I WOULD GO

 I had only told my bestest friend in the whole thin world about my super awesome fantastic plan of running away from everything I knew. He told me to go to a fairy pond where fairies gave you cake and candy and you can eat whatever you want forever. I asked him if he would come with me but he said his parents didn't allow him. That's ok. I'll just have cake and candy without you. TAKE THAT Joe. It's a good thing they give cake and candies cause I hate chocolate. Chocolate is too... chocolatey. Not my type of taste. Candies are nice though. They are not chocolatey, just perfect and cake is just the god of it all. Even chocolate cake is good. That's right CHOCOLATE CAKE. Enough about me, what about you. Do your parents force you to have veggies, not have dessert and tell you you're going to become fat if you eat pizza? Oh you want to continue about me? Ok. I mean I don't really mind...

WHAT HAPPENED

Then came what people called the apocalypse. They said people who got bitten by green people would become green people. So I had to run away from green people. I personally didn't think there was anything wrong by becoming a green person but I was going to escape and I can't escape if I'm a green person so I ran away from green people. For about three days I ran from green people and I saw green people bite normal people and normal people becoming green people. Heheh they looked like goblins from Clash of Clans. Some of my friends became goblins and I ran away from them. It was fine cause I was the fastest runner in the class (and not FAT).

RUNNING

So I decided to run. For about 5 minutes I ran and ran and ran. Then I got tired and took a taxi. I told the taxi driver I wanted to go to a fairy pond where the fairies gave you cake and candy. Not only did he get very angry but he also booted me out of the car (LITERALLY). So I ran to Joe. Unfortunately, Joe had become a green person. I asked him where the fairy pond was but all he was interested in was my brain. My mummy always told me I didn't have one so I was fine. While he was trying very hard to open my head I told him I didn't have a brain. "Understandable" he sullenly said. He told me it was north of Hoppy Hills near a big log in the shape of a goat. I thanked him for the information and wished him luck for finding brains to eat. He wished me luck finding the fairy pond. Funny, I thought. If he gave me the directions I should have no difficulty finding it.

GOING TO THE FAIRY POND

So I asked my new taxi driver to take me to Hoppy Hills. She then shouted "You don't have money for that kind of journey mister. So you go your way before I tell your mama". I didn't want my mum to know I was running away. So I got out. The next taxi driver was much nicer. He took me to a nice little hill with a big wooden sign saying "WELCOME TO HOPPY HILLS!". He told me the fare and I gave him that much of my pocket money and head out. I took my brand new looking compass from boy scouts and head north. It was actually a four year old compass but I had never used it so might as well call it new. I headed up the hill until I found the goat shaped log. It was uncanny in it's resemblance shaun the shaun the sheep. I mean goats and sheeps are basically the same. Right? I'm not really sure but I think they are. Anyways, I was standing proud at the top of the hill a lady in a lovely pink dress came up to me and offered me cake. I was delighted! That's how I got to stay in the Hoppy lodge and have cake and candy!

WHERE IS THE POND?

After a few merry years of munching cake and candy, becoming as fat as shaun the sheep and whatever I wanted, I wondered... where was the pond? After all that's where I wanted to go wasn't it. I asked the lady who brought me into the lodge and she said she didn't know. The next day I went out of the lodge to explore further north. I knew she had explicitly told me not to but since when have you known me to listen? So I ventured up further north and came across a wide river. I swam across it while floating on a log and had crossed most of the river before I got caught by the current. I got sucked underwater and couldn't breathe so I accidentally gulped some water. It was sweet! As I managed to get out of the water and come on the land I started to notice something. Everything was tasty. The sand tasted like sprinkles. Rocks like sour candy. Tree's like wafers. I happily stayed in this wonderful place forever!