Red, Blue, White

Submitted into Contest #51 in response to: Write a story about someone who's haunted by their past.... view prompt

247 comments

General

To Bella,

 

Red was the colour of your favourite flower, roses. The first flower that I bought for a girl. The flower that you always liked to receive, regardless of the situation.

 

Blue was the colour of your skirt, your junior high school uniform. The one you wore when we first met at the entrance test for the high school that we attended.

 

White reminded me of the packaging of your favourite soft drink. The fizzy drink that tasted weird, the beverage that I hated. The only thing that we couldn’t seem to agree on.

 

Yet it all changed after that car accident under the orange-coloured sky.

 

Red became a strong and lasting imagery in my mind. 

 

It reminded me of the blood, as it gushed out from the back of your head as you gradually closed your eyes. The colour of the warm liquid that painted your cold body, the colour that got transferred to mine as I hugged you for the last time. 

 

It kept me awake at night, as guilt filled my heart. The feeling that grew bigger as I saw the pained expression on your father’s face, who was calming down your crying mother as they arrived at the bloody scene. 

 

The guilt that stayed within me, regardless of how many times I bowed down and apologized to your parents. 

 

The feeling that I still get every time I visit your parents, up until now.

 

It made me think of the accident. The exact memory inside my mind that relived again and again, as if it was a video with a replay button. 

 

The conversation that we were having.

 

The speed of the car before we hit the railing.

 

The loud thud as the airbag popped.

 

The few seconds when we floated.

 

The moment our car descended the rocky cliff. 

 

The memory that I wished to forget, the memory that scarred me for life.

 

Blue became this ambiguous connection between the two of us.

 

It was the colour of the car that I drove that day. The automatic sedan that I brought for the sake of showing-off, unfortunately, became the car that brought an end to your life. 

 

It became the epitome of regret. 

 

The feelings that raised questions inside my head.

 

What if I had never driven the car? Maybe you would feel disappointed that I couldn’t bring you to the observatory as promised, but you would still be by my side. 

 

What if I had never asked you out? Maybe my high school memories wouldn’t be full of happiness, but you would still be alive and well.

 

What if I had never fallen in love with you? Maybe this wouldn’t happen and both of us would never have to suffer the way we are now. 

 

The same set of questions that I still ask myself from time to time.

 

And the same set of answers that I still come up with.

 

It brought self-blame into my brain. The feeling that reminded me about the stupid idea to bring you to the mountaintop, about my foolish bravery to drive, despite the lack of my driving skill. 

 

The feeling that led to another voice inside my head.

 

“Why did you do that, Kevin? What were you thinking? Oh, you are such an idiot.”

 

“Now, look at you, a murderer. Begging for mercy, unable to forgive yourself.”

 

White became a new ability that I never wished to get.

 

It was the colour of the creatures floating around at the cemetery when I attended your funeral. Those that couldn’t be seen by naked eyes, those that were invisible to others.

 

It became the colour of the new you. The one who hid behind the tombstone as you watched over the burial of your lifeless body. 

 

Yes, you, the one who became a spiritual being, who didn’t know the burden of being the one left alive. 

 

Yes, you, the one who stayed behind in this world with a wish to talk to me once again.

 

Yes, you, the one that I still can see up to this day.

 

It forced me to think about what I should do.

 

If I become white too, what would you think of me?

 

Because if I do, I would be brave enough to see you.

 

Because if I do, we would be together again. This time, for eternity.

 

Because if I do, it would be easier to forgive myself for what I have done.

 

Yet it all changed after I met the green-eyed girl.

 

Red became the colour of her favourite dress. 

 

It was the one that she wore as she pulled my hands, saving me, pulling me out of the river after I jumped from a bridge.

 

The me who couldn’t stand to continue living in suffering any longer. 

 

The me who tried to run away from the life that you couldn’t have.

 

The me who tried to throw my life away, the life that robbed your future.

 

Blue became a turning point in my life.

 

It was the colour of the sky when I realized that she made me happy. 

 

The feeling that I got as this green-eyed girl put aside the rumours she heard about me.

 

The feeling that I haven’t had since the day you died.

 

The feeling that led me to think, “Let’s end this suffering, once and all.”

 

White marked the beginning of my new life. 

 

It was the colour of my shirt when I visited your parents. The time when I let out the truth about my ability. 

 

The same time when I asked their permission to move on, to be happy with the green-eyed girl.

 

It was the colour of the envelope given by your parents. Delivering the letter to you was the only thing that they wanted me to do as a way to atone my sin.

 

"Because moving on doesn't mean you forget; it means you accept what happened and continue living."

 

That's what your parents told me as they sent me off to the cemetery.

 

---

 

So, here I am.

 

Bringing a bouquet of red roses, white envelope, and golden-coloured wedding invitation in my hand, I walk between the tombstones, heading over to meet you.

 

And as I see your ghost, I gulp nervously.

 

“How are you?”

July 22, 2020 09:20

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247 comments

Charles Stucker
11:15 Jul 22, 2020

Wow, Orange Colored Sky part two. A few more shorts and you will have the makings of a "bible" for a novel based on the ghost seeing character here. He could be some sort of supernatural detective, consorting with ghosts to solve insoluble cases. You definitely build a strong emotional connection to the guilt felt by your protagonist. The quick sentence-length paragraphs provide a very smooth way of conveying shifting emotions as he lists his thoughts, sifts his memories. The juxtaposition of mundane and supernatural is handled very ...

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Deborah Angevin
22:49 Jul 22, 2020

OMG thank you for your review on my story! Yes, urban fantasy was what I aimed when I wrote this :D. I wasn't even thinking about politics and flags when I wrote the title :O. And also thank you for the feedback on the grammar part! I'll proofread the story once again and make the changes! Nowadays, I'm more active here than on Wattpad (but I do have some microfictions posted over there; since it doesn't meet the word count to post it here!)

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Orenda .
10:52 Jul 22, 2020

Great job. Conveying emotions with the help of colors is a unique thing and I loved it🥰 and do you mind giving a feedback to my new story?💜

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Deborah Angevin
10:57 Jul 22, 2020

Thank you for your kind words! Sure, I'll check yours out right away :)

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Orenda .
11:01 Jul 22, 2020

Thank you!!!

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Jesna Anna S.
10:52 Jul 22, 2020

Awesome Deborah! Giving me goosebumps with the colors and their significance! Keep writing!

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Deborah Angevin
11:00 Jul 22, 2020

Thank you for reading it, Jesna! Really appreciate it :)

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Jesna Anna S.
16:23 Jul 22, 2020

Most welcome!

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Nancy Drayce
10:19 Jul 22, 2020

I loved it! I really like the way you used colors in your story! 💜✨ P.S. I read it earlier today, but something came up and I couldn't leave a feedback as soon as I read it 🤗

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Deborah Angevin
11:01 Jul 22, 2020

Glad that you liked it, Nancy! :D

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Deborah Angevin
09:22 Jul 22, 2020

To those who read my previous work, "Orange-Coloured Sky": yes, this is the story on the flip side! To those who have yet to read my previous work: you can still enjoy reading this story as it is (but feel free to check the previous story for more enjoyment!)

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Batool Hussain
10:24 Jul 22, 2020

Wowowoowowowowow! You are certainly getting better at this;) I got hooked right from the beginning. Wonderful;) I can clearly see this story winning or at least getting short-listed. Really! Wow! Love, love this♥

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Deborah Angevin
11:01 Jul 22, 2020

Wow wow wow, high praise! Thank you for sparing the time reading it, Batool! :D

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Batool Hussain
12:56 Jul 22, 2020

You're welcome!

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Sia S
02:56 Jul 30, 2020

Nice story! I was totally engrossed . Maybe make smaller paragraphs.

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Deborah Angevin
10:55 Jul 30, 2020

Haha, will keep that in mind for the next submission! Thank you for reading :D

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Sia S
14:31 Jul 30, 2020

Welcome! If you have time, pls check out my story, it's called Daffodil High.

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Deborah Angevin
01:58 Jul 31, 2020

Sure will do :D

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Elaina Goodnough
16:43 Jul 23, 2020

Good job!

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Deborah Angevin
21:53 Jul 23, 2020

Thank you! :D

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Jen Park
13:59 Jul 23, 2020

This is like a poem! The mentioning of Red, Blue,and White created wonderful coherence in this story. (Not to mention that sad, lyrical vibe!) I wish you told us more about the relationship between Kevin and the girl before the accident, because sometimes we need the clarity of the plot as well as ambiguity of the phrases. But overall, this story would be a truly phenomenal and perfect one with a little bit of editing! I'm very jealous of your talent! (In a good way, of course.) :D

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Deborah Angevin
21:55 Jul 23, 2020

Glad that someone liked the structure and the repetition of the colour throughout the story! For the background story before the crash: will be for the next submission when the prompt fits! ;)

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16:25 Jul 22, 2020

This was beautiful, Deborah! The story line was upsetting, yet amazing at the same time. Kevin's ability to still see her was oustanding, along with the fact that he was able to move on and marry the green-eyed girl. Keep writing and stay healthy. -Brooke

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Deborah Angevin
22:28 Jul 22, 2020

Glad that you enjoyed the story, Brooke! You too, stay healthy! :D

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00:12 Jul 23, 2020

:D

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12:00 Jul 22, 2020

What a story! This gave me the chills as I was reading... great job!

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Deborah Angevin
22:40 Jul 22, 2020

Thank you for reading and enjoying it, Johanna! :D

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John K Adams
23:28 Jul 23, 2020

Quite an accomplishment. He is obsessed with his guilt and blurting out his confession as fast as possible before he loses heart. The last line really did it for me. Looking forward to more.

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Deborah Angevin
11:50 Jul 24, 2020

It isn't written implicitly here, but it was on the previous story; this guilt of him happens over ten years!

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