An Explosion in Time

      An Explosion in Time

Stumpville or ‘Dumpville’ as twelve-year old Warren Douglas called it was a boring burg. There wasn’t much ever going on and everyone was square, backwards and not very interesting. He had lived in the small town his whole life and screamed for a change of scenery.

“Someday, I am going to get out of this one-horse buggy loser stink hole.”

His parents had been born and raised in Stumpville and they were both heavily involved in all town activities. When someone decided to put together a time capsule, Warren thought his mother was going to have a stroke with excitement.

“What a wonderful idea,” she was so full of cheer.

“What is so great about it, mom?”

“Well, it won’t be opened for twenty-five years. Imagine the surprise that people in the future will have when they discover what life was like a generation or two ago?”

“Sure, mom, it sounds great.”  

What he wanted to tell his mother was that in twenty-five years from now there wouldn’t be any real or major changes. It would be the same faces doing the same thing as it had been for years.

“I want you to enter the contest as to what could go in the time capsule so you can win it. Wouldn’t that be so exciting, Warren?”

“I would be thrilled.” Sometimes, it was good to humour his mother.

“Great, I went to the trouble to obtain an entry form for you and your two sisters.”

Warren had a fourteen year old sister, Becky Lynn and a younger sister, Edith Marie.

The boy didn’t really give it that much thought and knew that there was no way of getting out of entering the contest. But what should he suggest to put in the time capsule? It had to be something clever cause the dopes at school the next day talked about incessantly.

Their teacher, Mrs. Applegate raved about how wonderful it would if one of her students could win that contest. The town committee (of which both his parents were on), had decided that there would be three representatives to contribute to the capsule.  

The first would be chosen from the school population, the second from the middle class and the third a senior citizen. This way the managed to get three different perspectives.  

“Oh, Warren, you just have to win this for your mother.”

“What about Becky Lynn and Edith Marie?”

“They will try, but I think that you are the one that will do it.”

He sighed.  

“I am not really sure what to put in.”

“Well, think really hard because you only have a week.”

Everyday for the next week, his mother nagged him about what he was going to put in the time capsule.

“Warren, have you decided what you are going to put in the time capsule?”

“No, mother, not yet.”

“Well, what are you waiting for?”

“Don’t worry mother, I will think of something.”

The days slipped by and the pressure grew. Everyone at school was super excited. Everyone, but Warren it seemed.

“What is the big deal?”  

The teacher spent at least half an hour a day making possible suggestions. The pet favourite was Cindy Morgan, some little snotty nosed brat. Warren hated her and she hated him. They had been rivals since kindergarten.

It was the night before the contest deadline.

“Warren, dear, have you decided what you are going to put in the time capsule?”

“Yes, mother, I have decided what I am going to put in it.”

His mother was giddy with excitement.

“Well, what is it?”

“I can’t tell you because it is a secret.”

She looked so disappointed that the woman was ready to cry.

“Oh, can you give me a hint?”

“No, mother, not at all.”

“Oh, Warren, don’t give your mother such a hard time.”

“Well, I am sure that it is going to be something great.”

“It will be.”

There was a huge school assembly and everyone had to present their capsule gift. There were all kinds of ideas including t-shirts, CDs, home made videos and collages covering every aspect under the sun.

When it was Warren’s turn he held up the Stumpville phonebook.

“This is your idea?”

“It is brilliant. Think about it for a second. In twenty-five years from now how many of the same people are going to be living in this town?”

Mrs. Applegate wasn’t sure at first and then nodded her head.

“I like it.”

Slowly, one after one everyone started to agree with it. They also liked it.

Warren was awarded with the honour of being one of the three to put something in the capsule. Of course, the little imp wasn’t just going to put in a telephone book; he was going to put something else in.

On the big day, he held his telephone book and put it in the capsule. His parents were so proud.

The phone book was wrapped up in a box. What nobody knew that in that box it wasn’t the town phone book. It was a bomb that would only be detonated when opened. There were several packages of honey strapped to the bomb.

There was a banquet after and he sat at the VIP table with the other two contributors.  

Life moved on. 

Warren went on to high school and was a typical teenager playing video games, criticized everything that wasn’t cool and couldn’t wait to learn how to drive. He went to prom stag and watched one of his buddies park a car in the river. It was a fun night.

He went to college and graduated with a computer science degree. He managed to land a great job and moved up through the company rather quickly.  

Warren had never been much into girls, but one day he met a female named Gloria. She was beautiful, but also was fun-loving. Their personalities meshed.

“You are the female me.”

“You are the male me.”

They laughed and held hands through life. Eventually, they got married and settled down.

They had two children, a boy and a girl.

Warren never went back to Dumpville because he never wanted anything to do with that place.

Eventually, he reached a twenty-five year anniversary of the day the capsule was buried. It was time to open it.

“Hello, Warren, how would you like to come back home and help us open the time capsule?”

The thought of going back to Dullsville wasn’t going to happen.

“No thanks, I am busy that day.”

His wife, Gloria heard the conversation.

“Warren, I think you should go.”

“I really don’t want to do that.”

“It would be good for the kids.”

He groaned and decided to make his wife happy.

So they went back to Stumpville and there was a big ceremony.

When it was time to pull out the capsule and open it. But, then Warren had a flashback and started to sweat. Because, he knew what was going to happen.

“Maybe we should leave it buried?”

“No, I think that you should open it.”

“I don’t want to open it.”

“Warren, you have to.”

He looked around and saw Cindy Morgan. 

“You know, when I was living here and in school, there was a girl that didn’t like me very much. That was okay, because I didn’t like her very much. Well, after all of these years it is time to make amends. I think that Cindy Morgan should open it.”

She was delighted because when Cindy lost out to Warren, she was furious and believed it was because both of his parents were on the selection committee. She jumped at the opportunity.  

She walked over waving and smiling at everyone. Her husband, one of the locals that Warren also hated and her dumpy looking kids were all excited.

The time capsule was pulled out and ready to open.

There was a drum roll.

Then she unlocked it and pulled out one item at a time. When it was time to open Warren’s box, she smiled for the camera and then she ripped open the box.  

There was a giant explosion.

Cindy was blown up and landed in a tree. Her hair was singed and her face was black. The poor woman didn’t know what had hit her.

The crowd was showered and coated with sticky, stinky honey.  

“I think we should leave now.”  Warren looked at his wife and kids.

They left and Warren laughed all the way home.