Dan & Alice Talk in a Car

Submitted into Contest #102 in response to: Start your story with a metaphor about human nature.... view prompt

11 comments

LGBTQ+ Friendship

There is no truth more assured than the ability of those you love to reveal the most inconvenient things at the most inconvenient times. 

This was what Daniel thought looking over at his passenger, as a swift breeze held the side of his car.

What small cracks that happened to be in the old model were found with ease by the frankly impertinent temperature.

He'd made sure that Alice bundled up for this trip in preparation for the season's cold, badgering her for a good month remembering the near yearly climate shock. While he was expecting this kinda weather in the region, he was still rather annoyed with her family for still living in the northern hemisphere.

As while hypothermia was just a fun risk for young children who don't know any better, it was horror on his joints as an adult, and he wasn't sure why their family's insisted on living like Yeti's. 

He'd really assumed better of her family at least, just cause his were absolute idjits didn't mean hers were. 

He really didn't understand it.

"Why do your parents still live here?" He asked.

"They think it makes them better people to suffer." she started grumbling against her parka.

"Well I guess I'm the best guy in the state then, cause my joints are creaky."

"Yeah, probably," she said, rubbing her hands through her gloves. "Thanks for driving me."

"It was really nothing, I love your parents. Even if I'm disappointed with their lifestyle," he kept his eyes on the road, "damned Yeti's."

"Bold words, for somebody who grew up here."

"Not really, bold would be saying the state doesn't evacuate every winter for just that reason."

"That would just be a lie, wouldn't it?"

"Yes, but a very bold one," Daniel said grinning, "You can almost immediately call my bull!"

It was a nice moment before the traffic got unbearable, and Alice made good on his prophetic fear, "I'm pregnant."

Daniel looked over at her, as if growing a second head would sound at all similar to the information she'd just revealed.

 "What?" Was all Daniel could think, Alice wasn't the type to joke about something like this.

"I'm pregnant." Alice reaffirmed herself, a brisk anxiety to her tone unmuffled by her winter preparation. She explained farther, "I dropped out. I know, I was trying to get an education, but between our money issues and the baby. I really couldn't."

Daniel was blindsided, he didn’t know what he’d have rather heard, but he really couldn't say anything to that. Considering everything else he’d known about Alice, her previous can-do attitude, and really a lifetime of anecdotes about her to that effect, it just didn't make sense.

"I want a divorce." She said finally.

Daniel was in shock. 

But only for a moment, "so, have you told Mick all this?"

"Oh, he knows I'm not taking my classes anymore," she said, obviously a bit angry at the man she'd married. "Apparently his crap matters more than my crap."

"I think he might know a little about the divorce bit, he's been an ass the last few years."

"Why do you want a divorce?" He asked, shocked by this last admission. Knowing Mick the idjit probably didn’t know, Daniel knew what happened when you were too permissive to Jackasses.

"Well, there's the money thing." She said, wanting to dismiss that reasoning. Like, for rich or poor was the last thing on her list of vows she could no longer honor.

Daniel wasn't ready for all of her reasons, "I think I might be Bi."

Now having made similar realizations in his life Daniel was surprised.

He'd thought with her family and how they accepted him back then that she'd have known before him if she was interested in anyone of the same sex.

Some families go and say, 'we know everything about you, you can't be what we forced you to hide!' And many people stay quiet after that. Like that response to someone's truth should net them anything.

A lot of people get stuck, even before that. He shouldn't stay quiet now.

"How'd you figure that out?"

She paused, realigning her thoughts, "I don't know when I started to notice other women, not the first time at least.” 

She seemed to want to count them out anyway, hoping he’d have noticed, he wouldn’t have, not when they were still sharing a small town, not when they were both still scared. 

“I remember wanting all kinds of things when I was younger, before getting married." That was something he remembered, that future she kept telling him about until Mick went and overrode every little dream of hers.

"But, I kept meeting them, women that I almost wanted more than my marriage.”

“It's only recently that I felt it. I didn't want to stay, and now, I’m not even sure I could love a woman, but I can’t stay anymore.”

"I feel like I've made my bed, you know?" she said it, with a too cold crack to her voice. "Like, yeah I could change it but-"

"I don't know if I'd trust anyone who only ever made their bed once,” He remarked like it were all that clever, "You're allowed to grow, Alice. Even if it means letting go.”

Alice finally dropped out and cried, Daniel had been expecting that with everything finally at the forefront, he knew a little of why she’d been hurting before. Even a little while can feel like forever if you're hurting.

There was a pause, and Daniel watched the anxiety that had once tightened in her float away in the silence of the car. He felt warm to spite the blurring weather outside

Losing hope or trust in one or more institutions is a near inherent part of growing up, and the same could be said for growing older really. 

They weren’t that old, they still had their parents of course, but there were some experiences in life that made a habit of killing a person's trust.

Daniel hoped he manage against that.

July 15, 2021 02:35

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11 comments

M. M.
00:03 Jul 25, 2021

Love the story, just the last line, could maybe have read Daniel hoped "he'd" managed against that", which I assume was about his friendship with her. Couple of corrections is all. Who's baby was it? Did she want to raise the baby with her woman lover? You could have had a lot of fun developing a nice little sub character on that perhaps, well done. I am no expert just a little two cents worth. happy writing

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Kathleen `Woods
02:16 Jul 25, 2021

Thanks for reading! It's a sure yes, that Dan is referring to their friendship. The original idea was "terrible revelations to have in a car about anybody all at once" I have a lot of experience with that, along with bad responses. Knowing that people can learn these things about themselves without necessarily having an escape-partner, I felt like I could manage without. Though it did end up a little too melancholic for the comedic potential.

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M. M.
19:04 Jul 25, 2021

right, and it can be difficult to make an audience understand exactly where your going, at that point I don't do that style of writing since I am not experienced enough at it yet. cheers

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M. M.
19:04 Jul 25, 2021

right, and it can be difficult to make an audience understand exactly where your going, at that point I don't do that style of writing since I am not experienced enough at it yet. cheers - oh and I think I meant to say sub-plot on the baby issue. lol not character even though the baby is a character too.

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Kathleen `Woods
02:29 Jul 25, 2021

On a side note, a lot of the baby drama was along the lines of worst case scenarios for divorce proceedings, and really what a woman might feel was important in socializing her child when she knows she's carrying. Things that weren't important like how your treated or how untrusting you are of your partner become a thing your child will think is fine. and then raising your kid with your informally-adopted brother, and whoever can see you and love you sounds safer.

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M. M.
19:02 Jul 25, 2021

right and I dont think the baby issue was the most important factor, just an added sideline to her trouble's, it gave us provoking thought in wondering about that, in a short story it is much more difficult to get into detail and as writers we need to decide what is the more important lead in our stories. I could tell u really enjoyed writing this though.

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Chris Wagner
04:00 Jul 23, 2021

The writing is pretty clean for the most part. The last sentence was weird but otherwise I wasn't distracted, and I could just go along with the read and empathize with the character. A couple things stood out, though. You don't put an apostrophe in the plural form of yeti. It also made me wonder why he was married to sasquatch. He must have a very strange social life. And then she says she's pregnant, the text implying that it's not his, but wait, she's also a little lesbian. So whose baby is it, i guess her girlfriend is going to help her ...

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M. M.
00:06 Jul 25, 2021

you can do that if the person is talking out loud, that's how I read it. A little lesbian? She was bi, so she swings both ways - and she did talk about women, and was leaving her husband. Just a comeback on your thoughts.

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Kathleen `Woods
01:16 Jul 25, 2021

Thanks for reading, I'm glad that my current literary vibe is "casual interspecific sasquatch infidelity" even if that shade of spit-take wasn't my goal this time.

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Soofia Asad
08:23 Jul 15, 2021

Loved this story

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Kathleen `Woods
21:36 Jul 15, 2021

Thanks, I'm glad I managed 1000+

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