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Happy Friendship Funny

“I told you last month that I was going to put myself back out there in the dating world, but I’m just not ready yet. Besides, you’re dating enough for the both of us.” He says as he shakes his head and takes another drink from his beer.

“It’s a hobby Jayson. And a damn good one too. Also, it’s become my favorite hobby. You should take it up too. What do you have to lose?” I put two fingers in the air and signal for the bartender to bring us two more shots.

“I just don’t get it man, what’s the point? Don’t you want to settle down and start a life with someone?” He says as he checks his watch. “Doesn’t it get old? The same routine?”

“Get old? Nope, think about it. You go on a date. Anywhere, with anyone you want. It’s never the same thing with the same person. Unless you want to date that person again. Then it wouldn’t be a hobby. It would just be dating.” I laugh and look around for my next date. “Listen, no one makes these people go on dates with me. It’s their choice. They know from the beginning that I openly date around as a hobby. It peaks their interest and it saves me from heartache. Like you man.”

The bartender brings us our shots, places them down on the bar and chimes in on the conversation. “Listen, you have to put yourself out there to understand what this hobby really consists of.” He puts a finger up and begins naming off the perks of a dating hobby. “You never get bored. You never have to explain to anyone what you are doing. Just say you’re dating, you wouldn’t be lying. You get to try new experiences, eat to new restaurants, see the many wonders that life has to offer a single man. All I’m saying is don’t diss it until you try it. Besides, Ray know what he’s doing, you should take pointers.” He pours himself a shot and taps it on the counter. “I did, and it’s great. Bottoms up boys!” We clink shot glasses and take them back.

“Whatever, there isn’t anything wrong with dating just one person and wanting to have a life with someone.” Jayson says as he stares me down. “Listen, nobody is saying that there is anything wrong with that man, I just think you should try it for a while, get to know yourself. Find out what you really like and what you don’t, what you’re really into and what you’re not. Meet people who are into the same things as you are and just have fun with it. No expectations or strings holding you back. I mean, are you really ready for another serious life altering relationship?” I laugh as Caleb brings us another shot, laughing too. Just not at the same thing.

“Here, these are from the ladies at the end of the bar, they bought you both a shot. Bottoms up boys!” He says, laughing as he walks away from us. Jayson glances at the end of the bar and smiles.

“See, think about it. You give her the time and energy. Take her on a date, make her feel special and worthy and then you move onto the next one. Let them know they are worth dating. You’d be surprised at how many men and women are just out there to date.” I raise my glass to the ladies and take it back. Jayson does the same. “Heartbreak man, that’s what this ‘hobby’ of yours is doing to people.” He says with an arched eyebrow.

“Woah. Nope We’re not going there. That’s the opposite of what I am doing. I tell them straight forward from the beginning and there’s no heartbreak. Watch. I’ll show you.” I nod down to the ladies at the end of the bar who bought us the shots. Their eyes have been fixated on us all night. “What are you doing?” He asks, with sudden panic in his voice. I laugh. “Check it out. If I can get them to go on a no strings attached, no heartbreak date with us, will you agree to at least open yourself up to the possibilities of this new hobby I love?” I smile at the ladies walking towards us. “Here they come, yes or no?”

“Fine, yeah I guess. Whatever Rey.” Jayson says as he turns around to the ladies. “Hey, thanks for the shots. You two want a new drink, or do you want to take another shot with us?” I ask as I signal for Caleb to come this way.

“I’ll take a shot.” One of the girls say. “Me too, Patron please.” The other says. “Awesome, yes!” I turn to Caleb. “Five Patron shots my dude!” He laughs and starts pouring. “So what are your names? I’m Jayson, that’s Rey and that’s Caleb.” Jayson says pointing to me and Caleb. I grin watching my boy get to work on a great hobby. Just putting himself out there makes me happy. Caleb places all the shots on the bar in front of us and one in front of himself. “You’re lucky I own the bar or you’d get me fired.” He says with laughter as he raises the shot glass.

“I’m Rachel.” And “I’m Kristin, nice to meet you guys.” Jayson passes the shot glasses to the girls and then glances at me. “Cheers.” He says. “Cheers. To new friends.” I say as we clink glasses, pop them back and all laugh.

“Hey, so listen. I have a question for you ladies.” I say to them. “We were wondering if you two were interested on going on a date with us?”

“What kind of date?” Kristin asked.

“Well, a no heartbreak, no strings attached, just for fun date. With no relationship intentions. Neither of us are looking for a relationship right now, and I’m just openly dating. How about it?” I laugh as I take a swig of my beer.

“No strings attached?” Rachel asks. “Yupp, none whatsoever. No promises of a call back on another date. Still interested?” Jayson asks. I know he is expecting them to be disgusted with this behavior, but he has to realize this is 2021 and no one seeks relationships in a bar. I kind of set him up for this one. If it gets him out there and into dating again, I’ll take it.

“I’m game.” Says Kristin. “Relationships are over rated.”

“Okay, me too. Why not? No heartbreak right?” Rachel says with laughter. Jayson turns around and stares me down. Again.

“Cool, okay then. Let’s exchange numbers and get those dates set up!” I say excitedly. We exchange numbers and the girls go on about their business.

“Seriously ray? Could you have been any colder about that?”

“Dude, I told you. It’s just dating. If you’re straight forward you’ll usually get the date. People don’t like playing games. I’m not here to break hearts. I’m here to have fun, and if you start with that you’ll see that there are more people out there with the same intentions. When I am ready to settle down and start a relationship, I will. But until then, my hobby is dating and to make the most of it. And you, you just agreed to try it.” Caleb and I laugh as Jayson just stares at us.

“I mean, she is pretty and I guess it could be fun.” He says. “Fine. I’ll give your hobby a try, but I won’t promise I’ll enjoy it.”

“Dating isn’t about anything more than having fun. It makes for a happy, non serious, get up and get out, fun hobby.” I say as we cheers to a great night out. 

January 26, 2021 06:49

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