Mighty Education In The Heart Of Guangzhou Spring Season

“You have to show me the shop you are talking about. I have never been to that area before”

“You will not miss it. Just tell the taxi driver or cyclist where you are going and they will stop you in front of the market”

“So, there is a market behind that gigantic building?”

“For sure, big one. I never knew until that my Chinese friend took me there two weeks ago”

“They sell all manners of beauty products and all those love products like flowers you are after”

My friend Uche has this way of talking that makes you to laugh most of the time. The manner he expresses himself nonchalantly makes me to like asking him things even when I know the answer to them. “All those love products” as if it is the love portion I am after. I just wanted to buy flowers for the Chinese girl I am finding a little difficult to pin down. I hear all the time to behave like Romans when in Rome. I am in China and I take it that the reason I am not making progress like I wanted with the new girl is that I kept behaving like a Nigerian while in Guangzhou.

   Time to change strategy. I can hardly refer to myself as being handsome or rich but I am sure I am dependable as a boyfriend or even a prospective husband. When I love, I always do that unconditionally. I think that the girl must have noticed that and that is even the reason she gave me this little opening for long and I am not going to fuck it up anymore. Time to behave like the Chinese in China. 

I have to start with flowers first and then a series of taking out and holding hands like I see those China guys do with their girlfriends.

“So, you said this your flower is exactly what I need?- are you sure that one over there will not do?”

“It can and if you want her to fall crazy in love over and over with you, I recommend as a Chinese woman that has gone through that route forty years ago and is still in It this time as business, buy this one I recommend”

You could not believe what happened after I presented that mighty flower the seller to my prospective girlfriend. She was first surprised and was eyeing me askance before telling me that the flower is too big and not what I was supposed to buy. A single one would have done she told me. 

Education, a full crash course of its own followed that flower that make me feel ashamed inwardly and relieved at the same time. At least I take it that she must have cared a little bit more than before to see it feat to set out her time to educate me.

Our talks have always been summarized versions from her end. At times, she will be replying as if she is in a hurry or that I don't merit speaking to in details. 

Why do the female species like to peg things in 50-50 ways? Neither here nor there. Things like that make me confused and when you have the type of ego I do, you start playing it safe to not pack up with shame and self-loathing afterwards.

Time to try another strategy. Chinese way first, if it still produces the same result, I try French, and if it still did not give me what I want, it will be the English way. For sure, three of them, one must open that door.

The girl is a teacher and cornering her in school makes me feel somehow. Two times I have been there, I found it awkward how to behave among her colleagues she invited along to the school canteen. After initially misbehaving as white man according to what I learnt in their movies and novels, I automatically resorted to my African way without knowing it. Afterward, In my house, it was racking my head replaying all the places, the moves, and what dropped out of my mouth to know if I got it so bad. No. it is too stressful.

Now, flowers the Chinese woman claimed to have a decade of centuries knowledge of as a girl and still at it turned out to be gimmicks of salesmanship and display meant to pocket more money from me. Now, I am being told that a single one out of the bunch that contains about twenty would have done. Imagine the waste.

If that middle age lady would go that mile to pocket my money, how sure am I, I am not falling into the same rabbit hole with what and who I am dealing with? Too difficult to know with the difference neuron in our different heads. 

I read somewhere that their Jesus, Confucius told them never to engage in anything that doesn’t have economic benefits. I am guessing that you must have read that instruction somewhere. So, I asked you, do you think this teacher I am interested in is calculating the economic benefits she has to get from me? Do you believe that must have been the reason she is into 50-50 games with me? She seems to be genuine when educating me on flowers, not unlike those African girls that prefer money, food to flowers.

I am a novice in this girlfriend business. Do I even tell you that one of my African friends has a passport problem and was arrested? It was the girl that went to the station to talk to the officers and they let him go.

I have seen many Africans and other nationalities that ended up in detention houses and deported through the girls they picked up as girlfriends in Guangzhou without knowing they are undercover officers that are overflowing everywhere in that city.

Precaution is never fear. In Guangzhou, it is wisdom. When some see you as a sound fellow, they try not to get involved with you in order not to find something to report to their boss. The girl is a teacher as far as I can tell but many other under covers are business girls and office workers too.

This girl never approached me or sample herself to attract me but then you never knew. Strategies differ for many people. Now that I have three, I am not empty enough not to know she has more than that if she is undercover. My papers are not in order. 

When I found myself in Africa, let it not be as a result of running after skirts in a foreign land. It’s a mighty negative sign that sticks like glue and has a permanent effect.

    “Single one out of the bunch would have done”

Do you think that flower's education is a sign of failure or rejection and warrants my shifting to French fries or do I take it as a win?