High-Heeled Princess

Submitted into Contest #250 in response to: Write a story in which someone is afraid of being overheard.... view prompt

43 comments

Romance Teens & Young Adult Fiction


A soft, red petal gently kissed Mesa’s front door and floated in through his mother’s kitchen window like a love bird searching the lands for a new suitor. The warm breeze delivered the delicate parcel to the table just before Mesa could take a bite of his Frosted O’s.


“Mama, look what the wind blew in!” Mesa said with a dash of exhilaration. “What is it?”


Lola removed the scrambled eggs from the hot stove and brushed them on an empty plate. She turned her attention to Mesa, who was wearing his Ninja Turtles pajamas, and smiled. His black hair was frizzled, and a bright smile was plastered on his youthful face.


“Papi, your eggs are ready!” Lola yelled.


She sat down and studied the petal. It had a velvety texture, and the color was bright and vivid. “I know what this is,” she said. “It’s a petal from a red tulip. I need to explain quickly because I’m afraid of being overheard by your Papi.”


“I understand,” Mesa replied. “I know how he gets, but a red tulip? How did it get in—”


“Good morning, my wonderful family!” Papi said, storming into the kitchen. His thick, white mustache was curled upward, matching his goofy grin, and his white hair was full of pep. He saw his daughter, Lola, holding the red petal and gushed, “Oh! You found a love petal, huh?” He sniffed the air and finished, “Ah…I can smell the passion in the air already!”


Lola stood and said, “That’s not the smell of love in the air, you silly old man. That’s your scrambled eggs getting cold!”


Papi patted Lola’s right cheek and beamed, “So full of vigor! I’m so glad I moved in with my two beauties last year! What would you ever do without me?”


Lola raised her left eyebrow and pursed her lips. “I could think of a million reasons—”


“What’s a love petal, Papi?” Mesa cut in. 


Papi sat down next to his thirteen-year-old grandson and widened his gray eyes. “A love petal is a precious gift from fate. You see…it is said that whoever finds a love petal is destined to meet their soulmate!”


“Really?!”


“Yes. It’s how I met your late Grandmother…God rest her soul…”


“Now Papi,” Lola said, “You met Mami at the market when you two worked together all those years ago. Leave your fairytales for bedtime.”


“That is true,” Papi said, holding the red petal in the light. “But I found a red petal exactly like this one before I laid eyes on her, and we lived a life of a thousand lovers! Now, tell me…who found the petal?”


“I did,” Mesa said, mashing his lips.


“Oh, that’s grand!” Papi replied. “You see, love is upon you. Why…I bet if you looked out the window right now, you might see your future wife!”


“Now Papi, that’s too much,” Lola scowled. “Mesa is too young for love.”


Papi stabbed one of his eggs and shoved it into his mouth. He knew his daughter didn’t approve of such things. Ever since the devastating loss of Mami, Lola had lost her imagination. He chewed heavily.


Mesa ran to the window and peered out. The sun was shining on the cobblestone road and the maroon shingles on every roof shined like a glistening ruby.


“Ah, what do you see, my boy?” Papi asked.


“Nothing,” Mesa said. “There’s no one out there.”


“You see,” Lola cut in. “There’s no such thing as fairytales. Now, come away from that window. You’re going to be late for school.”


“Okay,” Mesa sighed.


He turned to the window for one last look and saw a young lady wearing a blue dress with matching high heels. Her black hair and hazel eyes gleamed like a golden coin that some foolish pirate had lost. As she crossed the road, she unexpectedly spun around, and her dress twirled like a tulip dancing in the wind. She must have been a grand princess to move so elegantly.


“Woe…” Mesa bellowed. He turned to Papi, and his eyes were like moonbeams.


Papi gave his grandson a playful wink while Lola turned to do the morning dishes. “The secret to a woman’s heart is flowers,” he whispered. “You must win her affection with a beautiful bouquet of nature’s beauty.”


“Flowers?”


“No,” Lola said. “That’s right, I hear you two whispering. If there was a girl out there, and I highly doubt there was, it doesn’t mean anything. And if you really want to win a girl’s heart, Mesa, all you need to do is be yourself. There is no substitute for genuine realness.”


Papi shook his head and mouthed, “Flowers.”


With that sound advice, Mesa ran to his bedroom and got dressed for school. Nothing fancy, just his blue jeans, black shirt, and white sneakers. He grabbed his green bookbag and dashed out the door. Along the way, he saw the high-heeled princess again. She was prancing through the open fruit market, squeezing melons with a grace he had never seen before.


He saw a patch of yellow daffodils on Mrs. Banks’ front porch and plucked them. She wouldn’t miss them. In a world full of various flowers, she probably wouldn’t even notice they were gone. 


With the golden surprise in his hands, Mesa ran towards the high-heeled princess. When she twirled from the apple stand to the peaches, her mesmerizing light blinded Mesa, and he fell face first. The flowers were crushed. “Oh, man…love is painful!” he said.


Luckily, the beautiful princess didn’t see a thing, so Mesa went to school with a heavy heart and got through the day like a true champion. His thoughts never strayed from the high-heeled tulip dancing in the wind without a care in the world.




The following day, Mesa woke up with a smile on his face. He got dressed, finished his breakfast, and gave Lola a kiss on the cheek. When Papi came out, Mesa said in a low, mumbling voice, “The flowers didn’t work. Any more ideas?” 


Papi leaned down and said, “Chocolate. All girls love a box of chocolate. It’s a sweet way to their hearts.”


Lola smiled and watched her son storm out the door.


Mesa ran to the local bakery and bought a small box of chocolate squares with his allowance money. Then, he ran to the market. Once again, he saw the high-heeled princess wearing a red dress with matching heels. Her smile was like a million diamonds shining in a dark cave.


When she twirled to the strawberries, he opened the box of chocolates and walked towards her. Suddenly, a tall, robust man bumped into Mesa, and the chocolates met his face with reckless abandon. After wiping his eyes with his handkerchief, the high-heeled princess was gone.




The following morning, Mesa hugged Papi and said, “The chocolates didn’t work either.”


“That’s okay, my boy,” Papi said. “This next tip will surely win you that prize.”


“I hope so…”


“I know so!” Papi boomed. “Listen carefully…you must sing your way to her heart. No decent girl can resist a love ballad so strongly sung.”


“Really?!”


“Yes, yes…now go, and you’ll see!”



Mesa wasn’t sure about Papi’s advice. He knew a few good tunes but never sang a lick in his life. As he walked towards the market, he saw a beautiful angel wearing a purple dress with matching high heels buying a bundle of green grapes. The smile on her face said a million words at once.


Off to the side, Mesa saw a water fountain and drank deeply. He thought that if his throat was nice and moist, he could hit the high notes without a problem. He steeled his nerves, puckered his lips, and whistled. He wanted to set the vibe before the words came. Out of nowhere, a group of seagulls flew in from the nearby beach and flopped him. Mesa stumbled backward and bruised his backside. After flailing his arms to scare the birds away, the princess was gone…again.




Mesa strolled into the kitchen, rubbing his backside, and said, “Papi, that didn’t work either. I don’t know what to do anymore…”


Papi took a deep breath and replied, “Well, here’s what you do, my boy—”


“That’s enough of that,” Lola snapped. She placed her hand on Mesa’s shoulder and said, “I think we all appreciate Papi’s advice, but sometimes the simple approach works best.”


“What do you mean?” Mesa asked.


Lola smiled warmly and said, “You shouldn’t try to win this girl’s affection by doing fanciful things. Just go talk to her and be yourself. A woman wants to see your soul, not the fancy things you bring her.”


Mesa’s eyes grew ten times larger. “Thanks, Mom!” 


Before another word could be spoken, Mesa ran out the door. Lola looked at Papi’s shocked face and gave him a wink. 



Mesa ran towards the market and searched everywhere for the high-heeled princess, but he couldn't find her. He looked around every fruit stand, every vegetable hatch, and every poultry stash, but she was nowhere to be found. He looked to the sky and saw black clouds raging in, and the rain wasn’t far behind.


“How fitting,” he said to himself. “At least no one can see my tears.”


As the rain hammered down, everyone ran for cover, and Mesa decided to go to school. When he turned, he saw the high-heeled princess holding a plastic bag full of books. She was wearing a white dress with matching heels. He expected nothing less from her at this point. She was perfection personified.


“I just love the rain, don’t you?” she said.


No words came. Mesa was frozen like an ice statue.


“Oh, I’m sorry…my name is Althea!”


At that moment, a slow, jazzy song from the seventies rumbled from the music store across the street, and everything other than the raindrops went silent.


“Um…my name is Mesa. It’s nice to meet you.”


Althea smiled.


Mesa held his hand out and asked, “Would you like to dance?”


The rain turned into a deluge, and as Althea accepted Mesa’s hand, she said, “I would love to dance with you in the rain.” 

May 16, 2024 05:53

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43 comments

L. D.
21:12 Jun 06, 2024

"...brushed them onto an empty plate..." magic! The whole story sparkled with it, in a sweet, timeless way. Fairy tales never go out of style, whatever the stuffy experts may say.

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Daniel R. Hayes
21:32 Jun 06, 2024

Thank you so much! I really appreciate you giving this story a read! I'm so happy you liked it :)

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Stevie Burges
10:23 Jun 03, 2024

Beautifully written Daniel.

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Daniel R. Hayes
21:00 Jun 04, 2024

Thank you, Stevie! I really appreciate that!! I'm glad you enjoyed it :)

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Martha Kowalski
01:04 May 31, 2024

There was some sort of timeless quality to this story when I was reading it - like a cross between a fable, a poem, and beautiful story. Loved it very much!

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Daniel R. Hayes
05:35 May 31, 2024

Thank you so much, Martha! I'm so glad you liked this one. I really appreciate your wonderful comments! :)

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Kritika -
02:22 May 25, 2024

Your story was so vivid and full of details. I felt like I was standing in that kitchen and waiting for the scrambled eggs to get done. While I was reading the story, I felt so happy.

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Daniel R. Hayes
05:18 May 28, 2024

Thank you so much, Kritika! I'm so happy you enjoyed this one. It was a labor of love writing this and I really appreciate you taking the time to read it. Thank you :)

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Kritika -
18:19 May 28, 2024

Of course. Well done

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David Richards
22:17 May 23, 2024

I thought this was beautiful. I really like the family dynamics and your simple descriptions of the interactions between Papi, Lola, and Mesa still have a vivid image of the scene. This story was much deeper than the words that wrote it.

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Daniel R. Hayes
06:25 May 24, 2024

Thank you so much, David. That means a lot. I'm glad I was able to capture that moment. This story was truly a work of love. I really appreciate your warm comments :)

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Katariina Ruuska
02:36 May 23, 2024

Hi, Daniel! Your critique-circle match here :) This story made me smile, it was so sweet and lovely! I especially like your pacing and how you've managed to tell this story in less than 3000 words without any fluff but also without it feeling rushed in any way. I can see that a lot of your readers have already commented on your wonderful use of imagery and I would agree :). Great job, and I'm looking forward to reading more from you!

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Daniel R. Hayes
21:53 May 23, 2024

Thank you so much, Katariina! I'm so glad you liked this one! I really appreciate you taking the time to read it and I'm glad you were matched with it. I didn't get an email about critiquing this week, but I'll head over and read one of your stories. Again, thank you so much!

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Carol Stewart
19:36 May 22, 2024

This reminds me of Oscar Wilde's stories which people always think were written for children but weren't, rather the adult who can still think like a child - I forget the exact quote. Nicely done. Love the coloured petals emerging again in the dream girls' skirts etc.

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Daniel R. Hayes
22:31 May 22, 2024

Thank you so much, Carol! I'm glad you liked the different colors associated with her. She is indeed Mesa's dream girl :) I know what you mean about the quote and I can't quite pinpoint it either exactly...lol, but thank you so much! I'm really happy you liked this and took the time to read it. :)

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Beth Connor
00:38 May 19, 2024

I love reading your range its so much fun :-) Great story my friend!

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Daniel R. Hayes
22:41 May 20, 2024

Thank you, Beth! This was really refreshing to write and who knows, maybe more stories like this will come :)

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01:06 May 17, 2024

Dancing in the rain. How lovely. I felt so sorry for Mesa. What a series of unfortunate events. Thought I'd check you out. Thanks for the like, earlier. Loved your wonderful sensory descriptions. "the power to summon our life experiences and channel them into great works of art!" - this is from one of your comments. Loved the way you put this. I think flowers, chocolates and a song should be after the introduction. How someone looks should never be the basis of a relationship. The fact that she loves the rain and wanted to dance in it wi...

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Alexis Araneta
01:28 May 17, 2024

Hi, Kaitlyn ! First of all, just letting you know I'll be reading your story today. But I also agree with you. To a person who loves you, all you are is all you ever need to be (Thank you, "Perfect" by Rupert Holmes, for that line. 😅).

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02:09 May 17, 2024

Thanks Alexis. I already checked for another of yours but nothing new yet.

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Alexis Araneta
03:05 May 17, 2024

I'm not writing this week. Let's just say the only idea that this week's set of prompts gave me was...something I no longer have the heart to write, so I binned it. Hahahaha !

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06:06 May 17, 2024

Been there done that. LOL. I've been pretty consistent for a while but did have some earlier weeks' prompts that brought nothing to mind. And one I typed a few pages of and gave up in disgust. It would have ended up way too long.

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Daniel R. Hayes
18:50 May 17, 2024

Thank you so much for your wonderful comments. I also fixed the "pierced" line...lol. I agree that looks don't matter when it comes to a relationship. There is so much more than that :) Mesa did indeed find a lovely woman! I mainly write horror stories, but I wanted to write something inspired by love. I think as writers it can be a good exercise going outside your comfort zone. Thanks again! :)

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21:55 May 17, 2024

This is true. Except that I really wouldn't like to write horror. I can read it, and other types of dark stories, but dislike the thought of writing it.

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Daniel R. Hayes
22:37 May 20, 2024

It's really a challenge sometimes. I started out writing different genres, but when I tried horror people actually read those...go figure...lol. So, I just ran with it. My stuff is lighthearted tongue-in-cheek stuff, so I have fun doing it and I never take myself too seriously :)

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Alexis Araneta
00:09 May 19, 2024

You forgot to mention that Althea also found a lovely guy in Mesa. Yeah, sorry, I really like this story, so I've reread it A LOT. 😂 Flying off now.

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Daniel R. Hayes
22:38 May 20, 2024

I'm so happy you love the story! Indeed, I think Mesa and Althea will make a great couple! :)

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Trudy Jas
20:57 May 16, 2024

Another sweet one. And yes, Mesa, love can be painful. Ha. Had to laugh at Papi - I'm so glad I moved in with my two beauties, whatever would you do without me. My father once, only once, made the comment that since his side of the family tended to live longer than mom's, he would just move in with us - his four kids. "Three months each in turn." We all tried not to choke on our dinner, till my youngest brother mumbled " Three weeks in a drafty corner and he'll be gone in no time." :-) Just one question, Lola raised her left eyebrow and ?...

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01:00 May 17, 2024

Did this get changed to 'mashed her lips'? This also sounded painful. 'Pursed her lips'? Maybe.

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Daniel R. Hayes
18:23 May 17, 2024

Thank you, I changed it to pursed :)

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Daniel R. Hayes
18:22 May 17, 2024

Good catch Trudy. I changed it to pursed...lol. I'm glad you liked this story! Thank you so much for the wonderful comments :)

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Darvico Ulmeli
17:30 May 16, 2024

Nice one. I have all sympathy for Mesa. Once, it took me three years to win over a girl I liked, and when she finally noticed me and started to return my attention, we (my family) moved to another town. It wasn't meant to be. Good story.

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Daniel R. Hayes
17:35 May 16, 2024

Thank you so much for reading this! I'm sorry to hear about the girl who wasn't meant to be. Sometimes life has a funny (or cruel) way of changing our plans. Sounds like it would make for a great story, if you haven't channeled that already :)

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Darvico Ulmeli
17:41 May 16, 2024

If the prompt appears for that story, you will have a chance to read it. I promise it will be funny. Laughing, and smiling are like the glue that is attached to me.

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Daniel R. Hayes
17:51 May 16, 2024

That's awesome! I think as writers we have the power to summon our life experiences and channel them into great works of art! I look forward to that story! :)

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Mary Bendickson
17:23 May 16, 2024

The young man has high-heeled hopes.👠👠

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Daniel R. Hayes
17:31 May 16, 2024

Hahaha! Indeed, he does! Thanks for reading! :)

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Joe Smallwood
15:09 May 17, 2024

This is an interesting take on the prompt. A good story always gives me ideas. How about your good story taken to a fantasy plot line: Creation is afraid of having its reactions and comments overheard as young lovers spin lives based on...whimsical happenings, coincidences, what can't be but is, what never will be? Anyway, now you see the effect your writing had on me!

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Daniel R. Hayes
18:56 May 17, 2024

That's awesome, Joe! I'm so glad my writing helped inspire you! I think that's a cool idea! There are a lot of great writers on here, and the community is wonderful. I actually started writing on here 5 years ago and it's been a joy! Thank you so much for your wonderful comments :)

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Alexis Araneta
06:44 May 16, 2024

Well, Daniel, you have outdone yourself. You made me...cry at how lovely this was. OH. MY. WORD ! I was swept away by the beauty of Mesa's love for Althea. Just.... *Excuses herself because she's sniffling* Hahahaha ! - The use of imagery : Perfection ! I love how vivid the descriptions are. It was as if I were plunged in a film with the use of colour, sensory details, florals, etc. I looove how you used super specific imagery to describe Althea. (To be loved like her !! ). - The flow, velvetine ! Everything just moved like a smooth riv...

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Daniel R. Hayes
16:20 May 16, 2024

Thank you so much, Alexis! Your comments have me over the moon! As you know I write a lot of horror stories, so it was so refreshing to write something so different and express real emotions that tell a great story. I wrote this in 2 hours because the story was so fresh and vivid in my mind and I wanted to get it all out...lol. Again, thank you so much!! :)

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Alexis Araneta
16:34 May 16, 2024

Awww ! Daniel ! This is romance author-approved (hahahaha !). Seriously, though, I was blown away by this piece. Absolutely stunning work ! Yep, I can picture it; Althea and Mesa will eventually end up together. Hahahaha ! Just adorable. I know what you mean. Sometimes, the best fuel for a story is real emotions. With how ethereally-beautiful this piece is, I can say you more than honoured those emotions, I think. Always a pleasure reading your stuff ! Splendid yet again !

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Luca King Greek
13:45 May 17, 2024

A delightful fairytale,

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