I'm Almost Home

Lucy rushed in through the closing doors and knew she had made it. A train would transport her far away. Far away from the flat that had wasted many years of her life. She looked around and was suddenly overwhelmed by the bobbing heads of strangers. The panic was real. She couldn't breathe.

She huddled up in her seat and realized why the many eyes rested on her. Her bare feet, the shaggy clothes and the overgrown, unmanaged hair. Her blankey tried to enveloped her torso, but barely. She had over grown it. She looked like a female version of Tarzan and that must look quite unnerving. 

Maybe they're just as scared of me as I am of them.

According to her calculations she should be somewhere around seventeen years old. She had tried to keep count, but the endless darkness made her unsure. Eventually she gave up and began making approximate calculations. She knew one thing for sure - she was just seven then.

She remembered the farmland. A rural lifestyle. She would run over to wandering, wooly sheep and daddy would carry her up high disrupting her sprint towards them. Her strawberry-blonde curly locks would bounce, dancing to the tunes of her excitement. She could still see the greenery that dominated the countryside she came from. Lush grass carpeted the landscape and it rolled over to the horizon meeting the blue skies above. It provided her world with this serene fresh smell she only longed for here sitting alone in this train. It’s sudden jerks startled her, returning her to the now. She couldn't let her mind stagnate on all of that was present. Instead, she drifted off, backwards, to her past. Her mother. The most beautiful woman she had ever seen. With blue eyes that twinkled every time the shine of the sun met them. Her smile invited hugs that could heal any sickness. Lucy’s life was so very ordinary and now she wished for such simplicity again. 

The underground train whizzed by really fast and as it did so she felt her apprehension simmer to the distance established. She wore Mr. Furrows’ old clothes. That’s what he would give her. The train made its stop, and she wondered if she should get off. No. More distance. She looked out her window and all she could see were the insides of the station. How she yearned to see the sky and all its glory once more. Her mind wandered back to the cozy mornings where she would wrap her blanket around her entire body and join her parents at the table. Baked beans, eggs and bacon. Her favorite. She could still remember the delight on daddy’s face when he saw them. It was his favorite too. He would rush right in with a fork and knife and finish off so very fast. He then eyed Lucy’s. She would always firmly refuse to share and her mum would laugh at the dramatic display of daddy playing the burglar and Lucy playing the victim. She smiled at the possibility of that being a reality again. The next stop arrived. No. More distance. 

Panic started to settle in when she released that they would have most likely forgotten her. It’s been ten years. Approximately. What if they didn’t want her anymore. She went over what she would have to say to the police. ‘My name is Lucy Gray and my parents are Andrew and Mary Gray. I’m from Northumberland.’ She reiterated her statement as if she were trying not to forget the facts that could get her found again.

‘Lucy, guess what hun, we're going to London to see the palace, Big Ben, everything. Mummy’s goin’ to pack your bags. Come and help me.'

‘Yay mummy! Daddy is this true? I can’t wait to see the city.’

‘Yes love. Now go up and get' ready. Mum’s upstairs packin for you.’

The journey was long, but she didn’t care. All Lucy did was gape into the world that morphed gradually into something else. As they sped along green hues faded into greys. The earth turned into absolute tar and concrete. The serene beauty metamorphized into something a lot more sophisticated. She didn't hate it, but she couldn’t believe the stark difference. Her young eyes loved the sudden turn of fashion that existed in the city. Everyone looked beautiful. Once they had arrived they wandered through the lanes. The amount of people that lived in just one place. Her parents kept their promise. They saw the palace and all its luxuries, Big Ben, black cabs and the underground trains. It all seemed magical. Until it wasn’t.

The train made many more stops, but she couldn't shake off the idea that he would be there just as she would step off. She was petrified. 

She closed her eyes and shoved the image of his face out of her mind. She replaced it with daddy’s. He was her hero. The three toured London and on most occasions, Lucy was close to his side. He would crack the most hilarious jokes that made the monotonous tones of the city liven up. He had this amazing way of turning the most dreary atmosphere into a positive hype. She cuddled the blanket he had gifted her when she was just three. She was always with it. She had promised them that when she was seven she would stop carrying it around. She couldn’t keep that promise. Not when it was the only thing that smelled like home.

I just want to be with them.

Tears welled up, but she fought them. She had cried for ten years. It was time she stopped. Be the big girl daddy told her to be. She had a lot more to do. She had to find her way back. The train hammered on. 

She still remembered the first time she saw him. Mr. Furrows. He lurked behind her family. He would smile at her. He was old, but he had the most reassuring smile and a very pleasant face. Lucy was completely fooled. He was always there. Eyes set on her. Lucy hadn’t the faintest clue. She smiled back; even waved. Her parents found themselves lost and in this moment he grabbed his opportunity. Mr. and Mrs. Gray had their noses in on this huge opened map. Lucy stood innocently by their side until she caught sight of something. She couldn’t remember now, but then, it was something that made her drift away from the safety of her parents. It wasn’t much away. Probably just three feet, but that was enough. Suddenly without any warning a cloth was held to her mouth. All she could remember was the sweet, disinfectant like smell and that was it. When she awakened, her parents were nothing but a memory. A memory she used as hope to this day. Now she was going back to them. The train made another halt. Okay. I'll get off here. It’s time. She had no idea where she was and how much more she needed to travel to get back home. At the train station eyes followed her every move. She really did stand out. With an old man’s shirt and second hand trousers, she looked quite pathetic. Like a homeless girl who had nowhere to go. That wasn’t true though. Lucy did have somewhere to go.

As her head turned from side to side her mind raced. She didn't know what to do. She was confused like the day she woke up in his house. She looked around, but all she could see was wooden panels that covered all the windows. Lights would have to be switched on if she needed to see. When they were off she was subjected to endless darkness.

‘Hello, Jamie.’

‘My name is Lucy.’

‘Not here it isn’t, you’re Jamie here. I'm Mr. Furrows. Do you like your new home?’

‘I want my mummy and daddy.’

‘Well I have this for you, he handed over her blanket. Would you like a tour of the house?’

‘Yes.’ she found herself saying.

He then unlocked chains that held her to place. It was the first time she had seen them. The shock of being awoken in a strange man's place had not allowed her to feel the metal that cuffed her ankles to the floor. He had covered her with a thick duvet that kept her warm. It hid the signs of her imprisonment. He looked at her shocked expression, ‘Wouldn't want you getting away. He said with a sneer that followed his threatening voice. 

‘This is where you’ll be stayin’. This is the restroom you will be usin’. ‘This -' he gestured to the whole house, ‘will be your home and abode. ‘

‘What do I do here?’

‘Well you will be lookin’ after me of course. See, I'm old and I need someone to ‘elp me out. 

‘What day is it?’

‘Oh none of that. You don’t need to know dear. I don’t have calendars or clocks. We will live for the day.’

That was the start of it all. From the age of seven she was a little slave that had to answer his every beck and call. She was so mortified she would always listen. A small whip hanging in the hall would always keep her aware of the fact that he was the boss and she had no say.

‘Jamie! Where are you?’

‘Here,’ she had brought over his steaming soup.

‘That took too long you lil maggot.’ He got up from his chair and threw the bowl of soup to the floor. ‘Now clean that up and ge’ me some more. Do it a lot faster this time. I’m gonna give ya just half a minute.’ He stared at his timer.

She rushed over to the kitchen, warmed and poured another bowl of soup. She had to be fast.

‘The next time you're slow I'm gonna ‘av ta spill it all’over ya’. She didn't know how to make her feeble hands work faster, but she managed the next time.

‘Good. Got to keep ya on ya toes ya know. Now clean up this mess, iron my clothes and keep everything I need ready. If anything ain’t there… well you know don’t ya.’

Her days slowly went by. She knew she could escape. He was a feckless old man. He would leave every morning for his walk, but he would never forget to chain her first. She couldn’t bear the idea of being caught, until one day she realized there was a way around it. Whenever it was time for Mr. Furrows’ walks she would lock herself to place in front of him. She knew this would build his trust. Trust that would eventually grow to allow for some room to escape. The day did eventually come.

‘Lock ya self. I'll be back early this mornin.’

She made the noise that seemed like the ankle cuffs. She then covered herself with her duvet. She smiled at the irony. As soon as he had left she got up and waited for a period of time and then bolted outside. The sun almost alarmed her. As much as she wanted to dance to its rays she knew she had to move fast. She had heard the trains go by often. She was close to the station. She was about to ask a pedestrian when she caught sight of the subway station. She ran in looking back to see if he was close by. The doors were about to close. She ran as fast as she could, jumped over the hurdles that people queued up for and made her way in through those doors. Hours later here she was, in a station some place else. Bewildered. 

She looked around not really knowing what to do. She saw a crowd make their way upstairs and she followed. She knew she had to face her fears and connect with another stranger. She had to take the risk.

Nervous, her unwilling hands stretched out and tapped the shoulders of a middle aged woman with brunette, curly hair. She wore glasses that framed beady eyes. Her smile displayed a set of rabbit-like teeth that made her look quite safe and friendly. 

‘Hello dear. You okay?’

‘I need to meet the police please.’

She looked at her sympathetically and gave Lucy a hug. She then looked into her eyes and said, ‘You seem like you have gone through a lot, let me take you to the police station.’

She then held her hand and guided her through. For some reason Lucy trusted her. She felt at peace and she didn't want to let her go.

‘Cab.’ A black cab came her way.

‘To the police station please.’ The door closed and Lucy’s anxiety returned. No. She had made a mistake.

‘No no no. I wanna get off. I wanna get off.’ She waved her hands frantically and the panic rose beyond the threshold she could handle.

‘Calm down love, calm down. Look, look, look at me. My name is Diane.’ She took out her wallet, ‘These are my kids. Lucy, David and Josh. I’m just going to help ya. I'm not gonna hurt ya okay love. Here look Lucy’s just 16. You look like you're just her age.’ 

Lucy. She hadn't heard that name for so long. He had stripped her away from her own identity. She hated him. Tears strolled down her cheeks. 

‘ I’m Lucy too’

‘You are? Well isn't that a coincidence, see this is fate it is. We were meant to meet each other, you and I. We’re almost there love.

They got off the cab and there it was. Diane held her hand tight. ‘You're gonna be okay... Excuse me,’ she turned to a police officer in uniform. They did look smart. ‘Can you help. This is Lucy.’ The officer turned to face her. Her blue eyes met Lucy’s and the worry from within her grew when those same eyes traced Lucy’ s body from top to toe. 

‘Hi Lucy, my name is officer Mc Griffin. How can I help? Are you okay dear?’

‘I was kidnapped when I was seven. I escaped today. I want my mummy and daddy.’ Abrupt and short.

Diane and the officer stood there in shock with eyes wide open. 

‘Oh my good god!’ Said Diane.

‘Come with me dear, thank you Ms. I’ll take it from here,’ said the officer still in shock. Diane hugged Lucy and gave her a contact number to reach if required.

‘You’re safe now pet.’

The fuss made was a nuisance, Lucy met with a detective, shared all that she knew, gave a description of Mr. Furrows, but all she really wanted was to meet her parents again.

‘I don’t care any more. I just want to see them.’

‘Alright we are in the process of finding them. It might take a while yet,’ said the detective in charge. 

Officer Mc Griffin took over looking after her to avoid the dealings with child protective services. A few days had passed by, but the wait was worth it. The detective whispered something into officer Mc Griffin's ears. Their faces gave nothing away, but all Lucy heard was:

‘She wants to tell her. Let’s say we’ve made contact’

‘Lucy we have just got in touch with your mother. She’s coming-’

‘No I want to go to them. I want to go home!’

‘Lucy, honey, we need you to find the man that did all this. ‘

‘I told you I don't care. I want to go home.’

‘Alright,’ the detective agreed after some discussion. ‘You can go with us but please agree to come back with us once you're done. He will do this to another little girl if we don’t find him.’

‘Deal.’

Lucy was filled with much anticipation. The car ride was pure joy. She loved seeing her memories go in reverse. Grey hues gradually turned into green. The tar and cement became a lot more earthy and her destination eventually arrived. 

She got out of the car and looked at the stone-built farmhouse she was brought up in. At the entrance she was there. Her Mother with soft blue eyes. 

Was this a dream?

‘Lucy it’s you,’ a voice now older. She stared at her in wonder, standing absolutely still. She knew it was her mother, but ten years had taken a toll on what she looked like. Grey hair and stressed, hurt eyes and wrinkled weak skin. The guilt had obviously suffocated her throughout all those years. 

‘Oh look at you. Oh love, your beautiful. Still holding onto blankey. Daddy would 'av loved to see ya’

‘Daddy would have?’ Lucy was confused. Officer Mc Griffin stood behind Lucy with her head down- those guilty stained eyes. 

Her teary eyed mother shook her head. 

‘No, daddy... Was it because of me? Was it because I wondered off? I’m… I’m so sorry.’ Lucy sobbed bitterly. She didn’t think of the possibility.

‘No, no! You were his everything.’ Her mother hugged her tight. ‘He tried so hard to find you. He would have given anything to have found you sooner. He loved you my sweet child. And so do I.’

Before she entered inside Lucy turned around at the land that represented all he did. The greenery boasted the vast pasture, the little hills and her little farm. A scene still so spectacular. Even after so long. The pure clouds opened to show the rays from the heavens above. Golden and sincere, they showered down and warmed her heart. 

‘Daddy. I love you.’

‘He’s always watchin over love.’ Yes he was. He was still there- up in the heavens.

The clouds then drifted away like ships in the sky. The simplicity of her ordinary life was now her reality once more. Lush grass carpeted the landscape that rolled over to the horizon meeting the blue skies above. Holding her mother’s hand. She was home.