Son of the President

DISCLAIMER: I picked Russia because I felt like it – this does not reflect my opinions on the current Russian government.

ANOTHER DISCLAIMER: I know that this story is supposed to be fantasy about “a character who’s had their future foretold from birth - but isn’t sure if they believe it”, but I think that in many ways, though I don’t have dragons and magic and things like that, this story is about someone that doubts their future, which they had no choice of. Enjoy!

              Konstantin Kozlov. That’s my name. When most people hear it, they think of my father, Vasiliy Kozlov, the President of Russia. I have lived in his shadow my whole life. Some people think he is the best president that Russia has ever had, that he is the savior of our nation. And it is true that he has been good for the country; our economy is better than it ever has been, our military is second only to the United States.

But there are other people that disagree. Those people would say that my father is a cruel dictator. They would mention that he has been president for nearly thirty years, that he changed the length of a presidential term to the length of his lifetime. His opposition disappears, one way or another. There used to be an opposing party, the Russian Workers’ Party, but when their leader, Ivan Makarov, disappeared three years ago, that was the end of it. Former party members were quick to hide their past affiliations, and that was that.

Not many people know what really goes on in my father’s government. I know more than the normal citizen, of course, but my father still hides things from me. I find it strange, because my father has made it into law that in the case of his death, I should be president. But father gets very angry when I ask him questions, so I don’t. Not anymore.

It is not my place to have an opinion of my father. I had one given to me, at birth. And I believed it. I believed that he was the greatest president Russia has ever had, the greatest president in the world. I believed that he could do no wrong. Until now. But I am scared. Is it wrong for me to doubt my father like this? I have seen what has happened to his advisors, his allies, when they have even the slightest disagreement with him. Would he treat me the same way, even though I am his son? There are so many things I want to ask him, so many things I feel I should know. What is he planning? I know that’s a vague question, but ever since my mom died, things have been different.

I probably should have told you earlier, but my mom disappeared three years ago, right after Ivan Makarov. One cool September morning, my father woke up in an empty bed. He has been acting differently ever since. I don’t think he is deeply upset; he and my mother were never very close. I know that sounds strange, but it’s just how things were. But ever since, he has had a greater since of urgency.

I read the news from other countries, even though I’m not supposed to. The internet is quite convenient. I read the articles after Makarov’s disappearance, and after my mothers. People were vaguely interested, but nobody really talks about it anymore. After all, it was three years ago.

Personally, I think they should be talking. About what, I can’t tell you. It will make headlines in every country. It will be big. And it will have very big consequences.

But I don’t want to support him in this. My father is a ruthless man. Just about every action he takes hurts somebody. And I know that eventually, it will hurt me. It already has. I don’t want to become president. Nobody has every asked me what I really want to do, what my dreams are. I don’t know myself, really. I’m only sixteen. I don’t understand much about myself, or about my feelings. But I do understand right from wrong. And I know what my father will do will be very, very wrong.

I’m not a political activist. I know this sounds heartless, but I’m not as interested in preventing what my father will do as I am in distancing myself from it. Whatever he does, I have to stand behind him. If he is hurt, I will take his place and continue where he left off. I don’t want that. I hate being associated with him. I hate being in the public eye.

I don’t know what to do. I can’t focus on my studies, I hardly remember to eat. I just wish I were someone else. But I can’t be. I can’t change who I am. When people see my face, when people hear my name, they will think of my father. They will think of what he has done.

I have said this already so many times, but I will say it again. There is nothing I can do. Maybe you, reading this, were hoping that I was about to detail my escape, or confront my father. Nope. I will succeed him as president, and I will do what he wants me to for my whole life. My only hope in putting this on paper is that someday, someone will know the truth.

What do I mean by the truth? The truth is that sometimes, people do bad things because of what other people will think. I know for a fact that when I am president, I will do a lot of bad things. My actions will hurt people. But I don’t have a choice. Because it is worse for me to face the consequences of not doing something people expect me to do, or want me to do, than it is for me to face the real consequence of my actions. Individual human actions are defined by others. What do other people expect me to do? What is the norm?

I hope this has enlightened you, reader. And I hope that somehow, maybe even just a little bit, your opinion of me has changed. I know that this won’t be discovered for a while, and you will have heard of all the people that I’ve hurt, of all the wrongs I will have done, but that maybe, just maybe, you can find it somewhere deep in your heart to sympathize, and see that, really, I had no choice.