Murray Burns

Author on Reedsy Prompts since Jan, 2022

Stories (90)

90 Stories

2684 karma pts

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“Dreams of the Father” by Murray Burns

Dreams of the Father“It is a wise man who knows his own son.”                                 - William Shakespeare, Merchant of VeniceIt was one of the first things imprinted in Charlie’s mind as a child, an integral part of the foundation of his memory and a guidepost for the path to be followed...

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“Hollywood Hack” by Murray Burns

Hollywood HackThe cameras were rolling, the actors were ready, the director was sweating, and the producer was a nervous wreck. The studio’s planned summer blockbuster, “Brash Bags the Bad Boys…Again”, was behind schedule, over budget, and the company was fending off a looming writers’ strike.EXT. L.A. CITY STREET - NIGHTEmergency vehicle lights are flashing. The beautiful Honey Muffin, in full police garb, leans over a man lying on the sidewalk. Brash Bradford approaches...

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“Defenestraphobia Moves in Next Door” by Murray Burns

Defenestraphobia Moves in Next Door(Satirical references to certain phobias; indelicate treatment of the subject of "plus- size" people.) The day after the “For Sale” sign came down, a crew was at the two-story colonial boarding up all the windows. Kenny, the keen-eyed neighbor next door, couldn’t help but notice.“Margie, take a look-see on what’s going on next door. The new owner is having all the windows boarded up.”“What? Oh, my God, that is strange....

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“The Dehumanization of Adam Longtree” by Murray Burns

The Dehumanization of Adam Longtree(Language.) 1. White-collar criminals out on bond get to wear white-collar attire to court. Adam Longtree’s attorney, a salaried Public Defender with a questionable commitment to the task, had him dressed in a dark blue suit with a white shirt and a bright red tie. Add clean-shaven, with every hair in place, and an endearing smile, Adam looked more like a figurine on top of a wedding cake than a hardened criminal. Unfortunately for Adam, the jury base...

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“Bad News Comes to Buzzard Gulch” by Murray Burns

Bad News Comes to Buzzard GulchExcept for the fun-starved, thirsty, horny (on steroids) cowhands from the surrounding ranches, no one ever comes to Buzzard Gulch. There’s no point to it. One dilapidated hotel, two run-down saloons where the booze flows faster than water over Niagra Falls and the “women of the night” work day and night upstairs (and sometimes in the woodsheds out back during the rush hour), a blacksmith shop, a general store, a feed mill, a school with a fifth grade average age of 27, ...

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“Run Through the Tape” by Murray Burns

Run Through the Tape“You should laugh every day.”   - Jim ValvanoIt’s hard to make a hospital room look homey. Too much white- walls, ceilings, sheets, even the attire of the doctors and nurses. And a little heavy on metal- the frames of the bed and chairs, cabinets, dinner tray, door, the TV bracket, the light fixture above, and the steel pole holding the bags that occasionally pumped life-sustaining and pain-killing fluids into Carl. Nothing soft and col...

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“Hung Out to Dry at Central High” by Murray Burns

Hung Out to Dry at Central High“You dirty, double-crossing rat.”  - James CagneyAscending the ladder of ignominious incidents of betrayal, from least egregious to the most consequential- Benedict Arnold, Brutus, Ephialtes, …Vince! Temper your ears, prepare your mind, fortify your soul for the recounting of the most dastardly, horrific, deplorable, cowardly, despicable, and wretched act to ever cast its ugly shadow across the bow of mankind’s journey through the...

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“After the Final Curtain” by Murray Burns

After the Final Curtain“The best thing to hold on to in life is each other.”      - Audrey HepburnThere’s an interesting thing about magnets. (Aside from how the heck they work in the first place.) Held one way, they repel. Flip one, and they cling together. That’s odd.----------Unless you happen to be destined to grow to be 6’8” tall and run and jump like a gazelle, the odds are you won’t like your job, as in it’s a fun thing to do. It mig...

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“A Far, Far Better Thing...Really?” by Murray Burns

A Far, Far Better Thing…Really?                      “You should not honor men more than the truth." - PlatoCursed by a moment, plagued by an image, and torn between two loyalties, the torment persists. Friendship, love, conscience, and truth swirled around in my brain, engaged in a debilitating battle that could have no winner. Why must I s...

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“Old Biddy Gossip Garble” by Murray Burns

Old Biddy Gossip Garble (Some off-color humor.) Gladys: “Martha, how’s choir practice coming along? I hear the new Music Director that Rev. Barnes hired is quite charming.” Martha: “Yes, I guess, he’s pleasant enough.” Gladys: “And, if I can add, a handsome fellow.” Martha: “I guess, he’s ok.” Gladys: “What’s wrong? You don’t seem too pleased wit...

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“A Match Made in Heaven” by Murray Burns

A Match Made in HeavenHenry made ordinary people look extraordinary. He was as nondescript as they come- 33 years old, medium height, slightly overweight, thinning hair, 1 and ½ years of college, no accomplishments in the field of sports, the arts, or any other measurable aspect of human endeavor. He lived in a two-bedroom apartment with a high school buddy, drove a Ford Focus, managed a shift at a small auto parts distributor, watched a lot of TV, and had...

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“Bio” by Murray Burns

Bio(Trigger warning: Crude and likely offensive humor, suggestive of a sophomoric mind; think Beavis and Butthead…or worse; pre-apologies to all.)Doug- handsome, debonaire, confident, athletic, and charming; Wally- not so much.“I’m telling you, Wally, I think tonight will be your night.”“I don’t know, Dougie, I don’t feel comfortable in those situations. I never know what to say to a girl.”“That’s why you’ve got me, Wally. Let’s go.”-----...

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“Meh and Bleh” by Murray Burns

Meh and Bleh( Language) It was as certain as the sun rising in the east or old man Parker’s dog barking at the moon. Every first day of school for Mr. Livingston’s thirty-two years of teaching 6th Grade at Lincoln Elementary would begin the same way. The students stood at their desks, recited their names, and gave a brief description of their families, their pets, likes and dislikes, and any hobbies. He believed it was a beneficial exercise for both himself and all the students....

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“Woot” by Murray Burns

Woot “Miss Jenkins, could you please bring in the next candidate for the 10th Grade English teacher position?”“Please sit down, young man. And what is your name?”“Woot.”“What?”“No, Woot.”“What?”“No, not what. It’s Woot, sir.”“Miss Jenkins, can you help me out here?”“I think he’s trying to tell you his name is Woot, Mr. Carsons.”“What?”“No, not what, Mr. Carsons. I believe his name is Woot.”“Thank you, Mi...

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“Hercules Shrugged” by Murray Burns

Hercules Shrugged“Are you coming to church, Wally?”“Yes, I have a special intention.”“No, Wally, you can’t do that.”“Why not, Gladys? If you can pray for your beast of a sister to recover from her big toe surgery, I can ask for a little nudge to get Junior headed in the right direction in life.”“Wally, you can’t ask God to get your kid to play football. Besides, it’s his life. You have to let him do what he wants to do, allow him to pursue his dreams.”“Gla...

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Author bio

Dartmouth, then Law School followed by years in mind-numbing law practice; now have more time to write. "Brevity is the soul of wit."

Shortlisted 2 stories ⭐️

Contest #195
A Simple Act of Kindness – read story
Contest #170
The Rosary – read story