Taken

Submitted into Contest #37 in response to: Write a story that takes place in the woods.... view prompt

3 comments

Mystery

August 30,  2016,


Agh. Boring hikes in the woods. I should be at home right now, playing video games like Alien Warfare with my friends. But nooooo. While they’re beating the final boss, I’m stuck taking a so called, “Nature walk” with my parents and little sister. They thought it would be a good bonding exercise for us if we stayed in the freezing cold woods over night, right after walking about 20 miles away from home with only hotdogs to eat once we got there. “Come on slowpoke! We are almost there!” My dad said light-heartedly. Yep. Can’t wait…


By the time we got to the campsite, it was already 7:00. Time for hotdogs. Blegh. What do we get for dinner? My dad’s famous undercooked hotdogs. I closed my eyes and quickly gulped down the disgusting slab of undercooked meat. I chugged all of my water in two swigs, and went off to set up the tent.


Nighttime already. Wish it did not come so fast. I have to share a tent with my annoying little sister. She kept asking for ghost stories till 1 in the morning, when I finally Said it was time for her to sleep. I lay awake, wondering what all was out there coming to get us, before I finally drifted off to blissful sleeping.


The birds of the morning and the sunlight streaming into the tent from an unknown source woke me up early. I rubbed sleep out of my eyes, before sitting up to wake my sister. That’s when I noticed the empty sleeping bag. Where was she? Probably up, stealing juice and snacks before mom and dad got up. The door was wide open. Typical. She’d leave it open when I’m  trying to get some rest. I walked out of the open tent and looked around for her. Nothing. Where could she be? I did not have shoes on, and there are thorns everywhere, so I decide to go back to the tent. Then I felt something wet under my foot. Wet and warm. I looked down. Blood covered my foot and the ground, making a trail. Oh my god. Did my sister get dragged off by some animal? No. The door and the tent would have been ripped to shreds. I would have heard and come to save her. So this Is all my fault. I was sleeping as my poor sister was dragged away by some random person creeping around, preying on children. So why didn’t I get caught as well? WAIT! My parents might know what happened. I can just ask them! I ran excitedly, ready for some help finding her, when I saw a shocking sight. The door, wide open. Blood spattering the ground. Nobody inhabiting the tent. WHAT IN THE HECK IS GOING ON?!? I’m getting frustrated. What can some stupid teenager do against somebody that took my parents AND my little sister by force? Nothing, that’s what. But I think I’ve figured out why they didn’t get me to. I always sleep all the way inside my sleeping bag, because I get cold very easily. So maybe, they thought there was nobody in it when they came! Wow. Guess what finding out that the people who took your sister and parents are bigger dipsticks than you are feels like? Yeah, surprising. I checked for anymore evidence inside of my tent. Nothing. Then I went to my parents tent. Wait. There was something gleaming in the corner of my dads side. His watch. It was an old tiny one, complete with Roman numerals for numbers. Not worth much, but it was a prized possession for him. It was given to him by his own grandpa, who died before I was born. I looked at it, hoping for some lead on where they were. Suddenly, the hand on the watch pointed north. Um, I think the time is wrong on this old thing. But maybe its not showing the time. Maybe, its showing where my family was! That’s amazing. Maybe this thing is special after all…


I was panting hard now, having been walking for 3 hours straight, no breaks. Hey, they might be annoying, but they are still my family, and family is more important than rest breaks. There was a crisp chill in the air, and i decided, a little break wont hurt. I just need to recollect my thoughts. I found a nice smooth rock to sit on, and checked my watch. It was still pointing in the same direction as it had at the campsite. So it wasn’t telling the time. It was pointing in the right direction. Tha gave me more confidence than i had originally. But still. What will I do against the people who have captured them? Aughhh! This is way too much stress to put on a 14 year old! Then I saw something. A cave of some sorts, with a big gaping entrance. I think I’ve found my place. A small blood trail led right into the mouth of the cave. Definitely what I’m looking for. I slowly walked into the everlasting darkness of the cave…


It went on for AGES. I was walking for about an hour and a half before I spotted a figure, slumped against the wall. It was the same height as my little sister sitting down. I couldn’t be sure, so i waked closer and closer, until it came into view. It was just a plush figure. So this trap was set for me… i jumped as a voice behind me spoke. “You’ve done well. I’m very surprised you made it this far, with all of our traps and whatnot. We set them all over the cave.” He said in a deep voice. “Wait, traps? I encountered none at all. Maybe there weren’t any. You’re bluffing. Are you bluffing? I said in confusion. “What, no. Why would i be buffing? There’s no point at all.” He said in a know it all sort of way. “Oh, fair point. Anyway, what were you saying?” “That this is a trap. FOR YOU.”  He replied in an ominous voice. Then he raised his fist, and all went black…



When i awoke, my jaw hurt like nothing i ever felt. I yelled out in agony, but my screams were muffled by all the rope they tied around my mouth and body. I started to think of something creative, some way to escape. Then i remembered. I still had my knife in my pocket. I reached for it, groping around until my fingers closed around it. I turned it to the right angle, and started to cut the rope. In about 30 minutes, I was free from my restraints. I dashed to the exit in front of me, until i was blocked by the man from before. “Heh, kid. You want some more?” He said, smirking. I clenched my teeth, knowing what i was about to do.he took a swing at me, and i dodged. I was ready. I sped up behind him, and before he could react, i drove the knife into his back, right where his heart is. He froze mid turn, and fell forward onto his face, knife still in him. I pulled out, and wiped it on my shirt, disgusted at what I’ve just done. I dashed forward, out the door and into the depths of the cave once more. After hours of searching, I found another entrance, but it had two guards. Agh. Time to get to work.


Two guards dead on the floor in less than 5 minutes. I will admit, they were less stupi than the other, but still dumb. I stumbled over to the entrance, threw up, and walked inside. And there they sat. Tied up, and knocked out apparently. My little sister had a missing tooth, and my parents both had nosebleeds. That explains the blood. I shook them all awake, and cut them free from their ropes.we all exchanged hugs, before my mom said, “I think we’ve had enough excitement for one day. Come on you guys. Let’s head back home. I think our son here deserves a thank you party.” She said as we proceeded to walk out of the cave and into freedom.




April 16, 2020 16:01

You must sign up or log in to submit a comment.

3 comments

Rebecca Smith
17:57 Apr 23, 2020

The idea is very interesting. It would be nice if you could in the future flesh the story out a bit and tell us more about your main character and your villains. The exposition felt rushed, but the plot is a real gripper. Good job.

Reply

Show 0 replies
Luke Stinnett
14:24 Apr 20, 2020

Yay I got likes! lol

Reply

Show 0 replies
Autumn Hunter
02:33 Apr 22, 2020

This is really good. Good luck. I hope you win!!

Reply

Show 0 replies
Reedsy | Default — Editors with Marker | 2024-05

Bring your publishing dreams to life

The world's best editors, designers, and marketers are on Reedsy. Come meet them.