Shooting For The Stars.

He cranes his neck again as he looks up through the telescope at the stars above him. Quickly, James scribbles his dot on the paper in front of him. Behind him, the bonfire crackles with the rest of his family around it. The mother of the group notices her son and goes over to lay on the ground beside him. 

“Are you looking at any star in particular?” She asks him. 

“No, I’m mapping them!” He says.

The young boy goes on to tell her that someday there will be people flying between stars and they will need to know where to go, of course. So why can’t he use his telescope to make a map like the ones they use for roads? She pays attention to him and smiles, seeing his passion for the stars and space as he explains all the other worlds and things that they can see beyond earth. The mother wants him to keep that passion, that hope. 

Even if she knows, of course, that putting dots on paper as a “map of space” simply doesn’t work when one actually goes to different stars. But the way he uses his early birthday gift at ten years old is perfectly acceptable to her. One day he’ll learn the more accurate way to study them, for now, James is enamored by stars and mapping them, and she is loath to stop him. 

“That’s a good idea, James! I don’t know if you’ll still be able to use this map when you go- but hopefully, when you go to space, someone has made a map of where to go,” She says gently. 

Laugh, little James sits up. “That’s not it, Mama. I don’t wanna be the one that goes into space! I want to be the one to show the astronauts where to go!” He says, looking down proudly at his little map. “I want to know everything about the stars, so I can make it safe for everyone to go there!”

Ruffling hair, she says warmly. “Keep stargazing then.”

8 Years Later-

James looks at the paper before him. All the list of majors the college he is applying to offers. None of his decisions now is permanent, and can always be changed in the future. But still, it feels like a heavy weight on his shoulders, the choice he gets to make with a single mark on this paper. 

His father wants him to check off the pre-med box, or maybe choose to become a lawyer by ticking off the pre-law one. Mother wants him to do what he loves, as much as possible. And that’s not being a doctor. It is not becoming a lawyer or judge, either. The high school senior knows what he truly wants, has since he was very young and understood what he was looking at when looking up at the night sky. Even now, with his interest in the cosmos diminishing, he still isn’t drawn to any other option on the paper. 

The thought of seeing the stars like he used to through the large telescope real astronomers would use causes a lighting strike of excitement through him even at the opportunity. 

It had been so long since he spent time at night, in the dark looking through his telescope, which still sits by his window in his room. School took up his time first, then friends and even last year when he tried to run in track. But now, thinking about it, it feels too long since he’s seen the night lit up with stars. 

With his pen, he ticks off the box for ‘Astronomy and Space Sciences’. 

Surely it would be changed before long. Once there and beginning to study, James was confident he’d move it to something different for his and his family’s sake. Reminding himself, it was always a possibility to change it if the whole thing was a fool’s errand or a childish dream. But it was worth a chance, and to know he did at least try. Get at least one chance to see the stars from the university’s observatory. 

15 Years Later-

Returning to his own home, a tired smile brightens James’ face as he sees his wife has had a long day as well. Finding Lily deep in her reading while curled up on the couch. Handing her the dinner that he picked up, he kisses her and tells her quickly about his day, and they speak for a few moments before James leaves her with a second peck on the cheek to unwind in her own way as he does the same. Work had to come home tonight, but for now, he could relax. 

Putting his food on a tray with some water, he goes to the deck. 

The sun begins to set as he tucks into the sub sandwich that is serving as dinner for the night. Slowly the colors of the sky go from oranges, yellows, and pinks to a dark purple and eventually black as the moon begins to shine instead of the sun and against the background of darkness stars start to shine and shimmer into view. Soon the sky begins to dim, and the sun sinks below the horizon. It would seem he timed this perfectly to see the sun say it’s farewell for the day.

And watch the stars begin their night of shining against the dark backdrop of space. 

James eases finally as he whips his mouth with a napkin and starts looking up. The black sky enamoring him as much now in his thirties as it had when he was five. The idea of how endlessly big the universe simply ignites excitement in him. A fire that will never burn out. It was why in the morning he’d return to the observatory, where he studies stars for a living now. It was his dream fulfilled, really. Working with Kepler to confirm new exoplanets and such. 

But as in-depth as he looks at them at work, nothing compares to this. Just looking at the shining suns thousands of miles away. The charm of it never seemed to die for him. 

Finishing his meal, he approaches his telescope. Uncapping it and situating it the way he likes on the bench. It was a much nicer one than he had as a child, but nothing compared the one at work. However, it was perfect for what he wanted to do here and now. James could look at detailed pictures and look at stars from the files he brought him to work on later. 

Putting his eyes to the nearer end of the telescope, he looks up and silently names all the stars he can in his head as he watches them twinkle in the night sky.