A Problem for Later Me

7/4/4 KC (21st Day, 4th Moon, 4th Year of King Creshal)

It’s still weird to write the date as KC. I keep wanting to write 1094 QE. Queen Elspeth ruled 1090 years; longer than anyone before. Old as she was, and stuck in her fashion sense, we still loved her.

HRH Creshal is her opposite in a lot of ways. He dresses in current fashion, but he’s just a sort of stick-in-the-mud personality-wise. That’s enough of bashing the royals for this entry. On to the good stuff.

I finally got my approval to visit Aramantia. Well, approval from here in Gell, but I’m still waiting on the mountains of paperwork I filled out at their embassy to be approved. I hope it shows up soon, my train leaves on 16/5.

I lined up a place to stay there. It’s a hostel that caters to women only. Not because I’m scared of them or anything, it’s just the cheapest place I could find. The exchange rate for the florin is crap right now, so I have about 3/4 of what I thought I would have for this trip.

It’s to be my last hurrah before I begin working as an accountant for the next few hundred years. I wanted to go into medicine, but there’s no free training for that, and without generational wealth it’s out of reach.

14/5/4 KC

The king gave a speech today about strengthening our borders and blah-blah-blah, isolationist dog-whistles. Then more blathering about increasing our military industry and maybe bringing back the draft. He was dressed in a designer leaf-core suit, all bright colors and flowers, while talking about building war machines and increasing the size of the army. How out of touch can a person be?

I don’t care. I got my paperwork from Aramantia. Talk about cutting it close to the root. It came with a welcome packet of stuff like where to exchange foreign money. The sample of their exchange rates looks better than what I could get here. I even checked it against the rates on the date printed on the page, and it was a lot better than what the banks here were offering.

The welcome packet was probably six times fatter than it needed to be, since it’s printed in a dozen languages. They even included calendar converters. Instead of thirteen, they only have twelve moons, “months” they call them, but they have like 30 or 31 days for most instead of 28.

I have to pack. It would be nice if Marli or Constance would come and help, but I shouldn’t expect it, I guess. Ever since I said I was planning this trip, all my friends started pulling away. I didn’t expect those two to leave me, though.

It hurts not having them there when I go out and people talk about, “she’s so tall,” and “her ears are so short.” Whenever they’d call me a “half-breed” or some such thing, Marli and Constance would step in and set them straight. I don’t think I’m mixed, but even if I was, why should that matter?

15/5/4 KC

Tomorrow is the day! The day I leave on my trip. I ended up staying up most of the night packing.

I tried calling Marli and Constance, but both of them have blocked my number. Marli’s number even gave me a message that said, “Blocked because you’re a traitor!” At least my neighbors are nonjudgmental enough to keep track of my mail while I’m gone and water my plants.

I’m trying to decide if I want to wear something comfortable or dressy tomorrow. I’ll either wear my running outfit or go full leaf-core with a flowy, flower-print skirt, sandals, and a color-splatter top.

They’re both laid out. Tomorrow me can make the choice. Today me is going to order some takeout and go to bed early.

16/5/4 KC

I didn’t write anything in here on the train, since every time I tried, I got motion sickness. Anyway, the hostel is nice, and everyone here is really into my clothes. I guess leaf-core hasn’t gotten here. As if it ever would.

Where I’m tall and have short ears at home, here in Aramantia — the Republic of Aplya as they call it here — I’m shorter than most women, and everyone keeps commenting on my “long, pointed ears,” and how “cute” I am.

I’ve only been here for about six hours, but I think I’ve been misled about what I would find here. My whole life, I’ve been told that humans are brute animals, only focused on war. As if their role in the War of Kingdoms was the only thing they’ve ever done. I mean, that ended seventy years ago, in 1022 QE.

Yeah, if it hadn’t been for the humans joining in, and supplying equipment to us and the trolls, the orcs would’ve taken over the continent. They bombed the shit out of us for three years and our best strikes back were weak in comparison. The deciding factor of the war was human industry.

I decided that since I understand enough of the language, I should see what the human news is talking about. It seems that HRH Creshal is actually in the middle of a deal with the humans to buy tanks, anti-aircraft missiles, and some fighter-bomber jets. So much for all his talk of Gellic industry.

Of course, they’re also talking about the buildup of the trolls north of Gell, and how ill-prepared we elves are for war. The news people place the blame solely on the king, as he closed all the human military installations and airbases.

He can’t be blamed, though. Parliament passed it, based on a referendum vote to disengage from the humans that happened just a year before the queen died. I think the idiots running the conservative party are to blame for all of it.

Sadie and Ally, a couple of the other women in the hostel, are watching the news with me and asking if I’m here because of the trolls. I explained that I’ve always wanted to visit, and the timing just worked out the way it did.

21/5/4 KC

I’ve gotten hooked on social media. There’s a thing called Lupr (like, looper) that’s just a bunch of short videos of a minute or less. We can’t get that in Gell, but my phone handles it fine while I’m here — with a new SIM card, anyway.

Sadie and Ally, who are staying here long term like me, are trying to convince me to do a “Ten Shocking Things About Humans I Didn’t Know” video. I don’t know if I will, but I started keeping track of them.

· Human hairstyles are not all designed to show off and enhance their ears. In fact, humans with large ears might even try to hide them.

· Tipping is common. I don’t know if it’s a human thing or strictly a Aplyan thing, but they tip everyone here: servers, baristas, barbers and stylists, taxi drivers, even ride share drivers.

· They are some of the friendliest and most open people I’ve ever met. Waiting for public transport, they’ll just start up a conversation.

· Related to that: they make friends like elves make cups of tea. You talk to a human once you’re still a stranger, twice you’re an acquaintance, and the third time you’re a friend. That’s what it seems like to me, anyway. Sadie and Ally seem to consider me a friend. They even call me Els for short. I like it better than Elspeth.

· Humans are way more up front about romance and sex. I’ve been propositioned dozens of times since I’ve been here, but not all of them have been comfortable. Sadie had to chase off a few of the guys, and one pushy woman. She’s a mixed martial arts fighter, whatever that is. It seems to scare them off.

· The food. Oh, all the gods. The food is so varied, and complex. They have produce from all over the world, along with cooking techniques and dishes just as varied. I’m afraid I’ll get fat here, if I’m not careful.

There’s lots more, of course, but those are the ones I could think of right off the tip of my ears.

Tonight, we’re going out to see a movie in 3D. Something about giant robots and monsters or something, I don’t know.

22/5/4 KC

The movie was bad. So bad. But so good, too. I don’t know how to explain it. While it was going, I was hooked. At no point could I look away from the disaster on the screen. After I walked out and thought about it, though, it stopped making sense. If Dr. Evans had just told everyone what was going on, they could’ve resolved it in the first ten minutes, before the entire coastline was turned to rubble and ash.

I had to show my ID to get in, and the guy selling the tickets got excited when he saw my passport and visa. He said it’s a permissible work visa, and if I want a job, to come back and apply. I think I might, since my money won’t last for the entire time I’m here.

Ally wants me to go on a “blind date” with her cousin tonight. I thought that meant that we wouldn’t see each other, but it just means we don’t see each other before the date. She says he’s a good guy and won’t fetishize me. I think she just wants someone to go on a double-date with her, since it’s a first date for her.

Another thing to add to the list.

· Humans don’t do arranged marriages or have a reproductive health department to tell them who they can and can’t boink. (Sadie’s word. I think it’s funny and I like it.)

2/6/4 KC - 13 May, 2025

What a busy week! I’ve been out with Malcom three times now, and he’s every bit as charming and sweet as Ally said. Wish I could say the same for her date, but Sadie, Malcom, and I sat with her after that first night, eating ice cream and talking shit about her date. It turned bad almost right away, with some racist remarks about “my kind” being a drain on human society.

Malcom immediately told her to shut up, in far more colorful language. Ally didn’t put up with it any more than her cousin and then caused a scene that got us all thrown out of the restaurant. I haven’t encountered that anywhere else, but Sadie has warned me that there are more people like that out there.

Malcom says that he’ll always stand up for me, whether we’re friends or more — or even enemies. It’s sweet, but I think the gym woman could’ve wiped the floor with him. He’s small for a human man, but his heart is huge.

I’m getting used to the human calendar. Malcom’s been helping me with that and helping me improve my Aplyan. He talked me into doing a DNA test, since he got a two-for-one offer and Ally already had hers done.

In the meantime, I’m working at the movie theater three days a week for pocket money. It’s a fun place to work, and I can watch any movies I want, and can even bring a plus-one. I’ll try to bring Malcom, Sadie, and Ally to one movie a week, each.

27 May, 2025 - 14/6/4 KC

Malcom showed me my DNA results. I am mixed. My father, who died in the war, was at least one-half human. I never knew, and I don’t think my mother did, either. If she was still around, I could ask her. As Sadie said when I talked about her death, “fuck cancer.”

Malcom is an immigration lawyer. It means he makes terrible money compared to other lawyers, but he knows all the ins and outs of what it takes to move here permanently.

I only bring that up because there’s a special provision for part-humans. I can get a scholarship to one of the universities, and on gaining a degree, can apply for citizenship. It means I could study medicine, like I wanted to, but couldn’t afford to at home.

The more time I spend here, the less I want to leave. I’m picking up an extra shift at the theater in order to build up enough money to decide at the end of my visa whether to ship all my stuff here or go back home. Is it really home without Marli and Constance, though?

I splurged on a couple calls on my new SIM. Both of them hung up as soon as they heard my voice and then I got a “blocked” notification. Future me can figure it out. Today me has a shift at the theater to get to.

30 July, 2025

I’ve made up my mind. I’m applying to the University to study medicine. It’s 9 or 10 years of study, but I have time. I’m trying to find a place to live that’s not too far from the University, which happens to be close to the theater anyway. Ally’s decided she wants to stay here, too, so we’re looking for a place we can share.

Malcom offered space for both of us at his place, but I don’t want to put that kind of pressure on the relationship. Yeah, relationship. Never thought I’d be interested in a man that is not only forty years younger than I, but human to boot. Of course, he still chuckles when he remembers how old I am, since he says that when we go out, it looks like he’s “robbing the cradle.”

15 August, 2025

Ally and I moved into our apartment. I meant to make a note last week about Sadie. She left the hostel to go on the fight circuit. She showed me some video of her matches from last year, including going toe-to-toe with an orc woman a head taller than her.

She’s so nice, but she looks scary in her fights. The fights are brutal. She lost to the orc, but not by knockout or submission, by just a couple points.

At the end of the fight, they hugged and laughed like they were best friends. Another thing to add to the listicle I’m not going do, I guess.

Classes start on 8 September, and I’ve already got my schedule and got things switched around at work so I can work around my classes. Ally got a work-from-home job on her computer. I have to remind her to log off in the evenings, or she’ll get so locked in her head that she’ll work until midnight.

Malcom is taking me out for a fancy dinner tonight and even bought me an evening gown to wear. I wasn’t going to accept it, but Ally piled on and talked me into it. She’s logging off early to help me get ready.

15 August, 2025

I almost asked Malcom to marry me. We haven’t been seeing each other very long, but — scratch that.

At dinner, Malcom told me he has every intention of marrying me and showed me the engagement ring. He said he wants to spend the rest of his life with me, but he knows that it would be just a short part of my life.

He doesn’t want to put me in a position where I feel obligated, so he said he’d wait for me to ask him, and if I never do, he understands. He also said that if it was too much, too soon, and I wanted to walk away for a minute, a day, a week or even forever, he understands.

He was so sincere when he said that his own desires were second to my happiness, that I almost asked him right then and there. What the hell? I’m not sure, yet, but I think I will — later. Maybe after I get my degree. Or after the first year. Maybe the first quarter. That’s a problem for later me. Right now me is too tired to think and too wired to sleep.

Sadie’s fight is online. I’ll watch that, then scroll Lupr until I sleep or pass out or whatever comes first.