Resolutions

  I wake up. I can't open my eyes just yet. I don't want to wake up. I force myself to roll on my side. I open my eyes. Today is December 31st. I really can't believe it's that time already. I don't have anything planned today. I reach for my phone on my nightstand. It's 8:16 AM. I make my legs walk me to the bathroom. I brush my teeth. I comb my messy hair. I walk back to my room and climb back in bed. My bed is warm and comforting.

  I decide to read a few chapters in my library book, then I scroll through social media for a bit. Everyone I know is posting about the end of the year, some people are posting about the new year. My friend posted her new year's resolutions. She wants to ride her bike more, she wants to walk her dogs more, and she wants to spend more time with friends. I think about what my resolutions would be and I'm not really sure.

   So many things happened this year. I started drawing again. I turned seventeen. I visited family in Texas and New York. I graduated. I got my driver's license. Next year I'll be turning eighteen. I'll be going on a trip to Europe with my best friend. I'll be starting college. I close my eyes. It's a lot to think about, so much to think about. I'm scared to be an adult. What if I mess up? What if I've already messed up? What do I do? How do I get a job? I've had a few part-time jobs but nothing to actually pay bills. I take a deep breath. I don't have to worry about that right now.

   I think, what is something small that I would like to improve at? I think I would love to get better at piano. I grab my notebook off of my nightstand and write my resolution at the top of the page. I just got a new notebook, my resolution is the first thing I've written in it. I like to have a notebook on my nightstand in case I get ideas during the night. My handwriting is messy. I close the page. I smell something, cooking bacon, it smells delicious. Dad must be cooking. I go to the kitchen to see what he's making. He's making eggs, bacon and pancakes. "Do you want your eggs scrambled or over medium?" he asks me. "Scrambled please." I say.

   I go back to my room and read in my bed for a little longer. Then Dad calls me, "Food's ready, Kat." My name is Kathrine but my family calls me Kat. I like Kat. I hate when people call me Kathy though, it sounds like an old lady's name. My Dad is the best cook I know. He can take almost anything and make it delicious. If I could just be half as good of a cook as he is I'd be happy, maybe that should be one of my resolutions. My mom walks into the kitchen and sits with us at the table. I don't know where my brother is, he's usually up before I am. He comes running at top speed into the kitchen in his superhero pajamas. He sits next to me and starts eating his eggs. My little brother's name is Kory. I love him more than anyone in the whole world. I know a lot of siblings don't get along, but we do, most of the time at least.

   My mom kisses my brother on the forehead. He smiles a big smile, he's missing one of his front teeth. The pancakes are really good. My dad knows how I like them, crispy, but soft on the inside. I ask Kory what his new year's resolution is going to be. He says, "I want to eat more cookies." I laugh. "We'll see about that." my mom replies. "What's your's, Dad?" I ask. He says, "I'd like to read more this year." "Ooh, that's a good one!" says Mom, she continues, "I think I'd like to bake more this year." "Bake cookies for me to eat!" says my brother. Mom laughs.

  After breakfast I go to my desk and pull out my piano keyboard. So far I only know one song. I start to play the beginning of it. It's one of my favorite songs. "Kat come do the dishes!" my mom tells me through my bedroom door. "I will!" I call back. I go back to the kitchen and load the dishes into the dishwasher. It's full so I put soap in and start it. I clean the knives and my mom's coffee thermos. Those things can't be washed in the dishwasher.

  I go to my room and change out of my pajamas. I can't stand to stay in my pajamas all day. I put on some comfortable jeans and a t-shirt. I go to my desk and sit down. I want to get better at cooking this year. I get my notebook and write "Get better at cooking" underneath where I wrote my other resolution. I put my notebook back on my nightstand. I open my sketchbook, darn, it's full. I need a new sketchbook. I look around my room where I keep my art supplies and find a smaller sketchbook that still has a few empty pages. Last year my resolution was to get better at drawing. I definitely think I've improved, I'm not great at drawing, but I'm better than I was. Since the start of this year, I've filled up four sketchbooks. Maybe this coming year I'll fill up more.

  I decide what I want my third resolution to be. I get my notebook again. I write under the first two, "Continue to draw" in messy letters. This year was good but I think I can make next year better. I close my notebook and pull out my piano keyboard. I play some random notes and then begin to play the beginning of the only song I know.