I'm just an ordinary High School kid, I have a group of friends since I've known since I could walk, I'm on the school's basketball team, and I 100% have amazing grades. Except there's one tiny little secret I've kept from everyone since the start, I'm gay. Nobody in my family or school knows, I've just been afraid of coming out since I realized, I was afraid i would be rejected by society. I heard Mr. Hayward, my former neighbor started to be more open about his sexual orientation, right after he posted a rainbow flag in his front yard. It backfired once the entire neighborhood turned against him and he had to move, so I just didn't want that happening to me. I have dated plenty of girls before, but it just never felt right to me, I guess it was just me trying to cover up the fact that i was gay to begin with. There was the stereotypical cheerleader, Veronica, then there was the book nerd, Emily, I should probably just stop though.
"Jason! Get your ass down here and get breakfast before you're late to school!" It was mom, she was a cheerleader back in her day, dad was the quarterback, a classic teenage couple. I quickly ran down the stairs, making my way down to the kitchen, mom was cooking, so obviously it wasn't going to be good food. "Grab the breakfast burrito-"
"Sorry mom, suddenly not hungry, see you after school." I grabbed my backpack and kissed her goodbye. It's the same every morning, Mom is up making a horrible breakfast, and dad is at work, he works constantly, sometimes I feel like he won't even come back from his job. I was struggling to get my car turned on for whatever reason, until I eventually did, music is something that helps me get through the day, it's something that is fun, helpful, relaxing, but also can be a sort of therapy. So I enjoy playing some on the way to school, as I was opening Spotify, I got a message from an unknown number, I was about to block the contact until I stopped and thought for a moment, Whats the harm in saying something? which was stupid. Though, I did it anyways, I texted the number.
Hi! Sorry, You must've gotten the wrong number.
With that, I closed my phone. Awaiting a response, I don't know, maybe it's just me, but believing in the whole "meant to be" nonsense is something I just don't do, but suddenly I considered it. Maybe this wrong number thing, was a sign, or I could've just been being stupid. What if this person behind the screen could be someone just like me? Someone who I can understand? What if, I could share so many things in common with this person, we become friends. So I was determined for this mystery human to reply.
I woke up the next morning, staring at my phone, basically every two seconds. I just couldn't look away from it. I was positive this person was going to respond, sure, it was a 1 in a million chance, but it was still something. I feel like the only reason I wanted to message them in the first place was because I wanted to communicate with someone about my secrets without them knowing who I was, without them having the opportunity to tell anyone. I worry, constantly about what I'm telling someone and who I'm telling it to, because if something major like that about me were to get out I would be in deep, too deep you wouldn't even be able to pull me back out. So many people would make my life hell, I would be rejected just like Mr. Hayward, kicked out of my neighborhood and disliked by everyone I know. Sometimes just the thought of it makes me want to simply die, maybe all of the lying would just stop in heaven or hell. I don't care how it would happen i just wanted it to happen often, because of the guilt. I haven't ever tried anything, and I really hope i never do or ever plan to, so i hope this spring break goes well.
"shit!" I softly yell, I quickly grab my phone and see that the person responded.
Oh, My bad. I'm sorry about that.
I pause for a moment before typing out a new message.
No worries, I'm Jason, You are?
Zane, Nice to meet you, Jason.
I smiled proudly to myself, finally happy i made a new acquaintance.
After Spring Break
I would say maybe around 2 weeks ago, this number suddenly texted me. I had planned to just block them and walk away, but i instead did the complete opposite. I befriended the number. I've learned the person on the other side of the screen goes to Queens High School like me, He's a Junior, Like me, and He's gay, Like me. We haven't revealed who we are to each other, yet. Sure, he knows my name, but there's at least more than 3 Jason's at our school, same with Zane's. I guess it's just out of fear I haven't said who i specifically am, I'm scared, for sure. I haven't even come out to my parents yet, let alone my friends, but around him, around Zane, even if it was online, it made me feel better. I know they say it's stupid to fall in love through the internet, because you don't even know the person, but I felt something I never did with anyone else with Zane, with Zane I felt joy, with Zane I felt love. If I hadn't responded to that message on that exact day, I wouldn't have met him, some say love stories start off at a coffee shop, or at a homecoming game, It's just always "meant to be" no matter the place, you're but destined for each other no matter what, the excuse is always "it was true love" or something sappy like that, but for me, it started with a wrong number.