I

You love being the center of attention. You love being adored by the rest.

You’re kind and sweet and caring and your personality is what makes people want to be around you. You’re also smart, you know your stuff, people want to work with you, people enjoy hearing your ideas and seeing you get so excited over future projects.

They love your smile.

They love your face.

They love your body.

You love that. You know your smile is a radiance of good energy, people like your company, they like your aura. Your face seems to be molded by goddesses of beauty, carved with delicate features and lovely touches that bring a sense of pleasure admiring you. Your body is to be a temple which only those worthies get to see, but to you, few are worthy enough, you play hard to get, they love that. You know they do.

You are walking perfection, no one can hate you because if they do you have a whole army willing to kill at your command to make sure that all that negativity is not a foot around you and your glorifying presence.

You love all these feelings people have for you, yet you hate every single one of them.

You are very good at putting up masks and layers to create a persona. You don’t hate being a beauty standard, you hate that people remark it over and over to you. You hate the obnoxious comments of how perfect you are. You are annoyed by the people who can’t take a hint.

It’s a good thing I look after you though. It’s a good thing I got to know you first. I wouldn’t want you to hate me. Trust me, darling, you are going to love me.

Because I know how to listen. I know all about patience, I’m waiting for the right moment for us to meet, for you to realize I’m the man you been waiting for all these years.

You won’t have to tell me about yourself if you don’t feel ready, curiosity won’t kill me, I already know you. All of you.

I know you struggle with your body image so much because even though the rest wish they could hold you and feel you, I know you squeeze a non-existent fat around your stomach, your toned legs, your arms. Everywhere.

I wish I was there to assure your beauty. I wish I could whisper in your ear the things you need to hear.

I know you have daddy issues, he would come and leave your life as he pleased, only to fuck your mom when he couldn’t find himself a whore, and then by dawn, he was gone. Which left you to have a little brother you adore with all your life.

You are good with children. You will be a great mother to our children.

Don’t worry I won’t judge you when you tell me about your abortion of last year that almost cause you to kill yourself as the father wouldn’t even be around for the procedure. You still think about him, but you won’t for long, when you meet me, I’ll be the only man you think about.

Does your mother know about the student-teacher relationship? I do. I hope you tell me about it, I’m a simple man, I want there to be a trust between us, for us to share our darkest secrets to one another, I won’t forbid you to have guy friends but if you don’t feel comfortable with my friends they are out of my contacts by the next hour.

I want you to feel good.

I want you to feel like you can do anything you want and feel confident enough to tell me. I despise liars, I despise secrets. Don’t make me despise you.

I know we haven’t met but I love you.

I know you will love me just as much.

I will treat you right, I will cook for you, take you out on the best dates, go wherever you want to go, anything. You will feel as if you are some princess around me.

You and I are just meant for each other.

I like to think I’m the complete package, at least to what you need.

I know at first you won’t think that way, knowing you (is it clear I know you very well) you’re going to put up many challenges, darling I’m up for them, in fact, if you gave in so easily I will be… disappointed.

I want your wedding speech about me to talk about how I fought for you, about how much of a good man I am. I want you to say that I’m patient, caring, understanding, intelligent, hard-working, amazing, everything you wanted in a man.

I want to be the kind of man who makes you want to share the spotlight you get, to show me off just as much as I’ll show you off.

I will be the one to make you love yourself, I know you cry yourself to sleep, almost every night you have a session, you are embarrassed to shower because you see all of you, without any layers of clothing nor a single drop of makeup to cover your eye bags. You dig your nails on parts of your skin you know you will be able to cover easily. I’ve seen them though.

I sometimes just want to hold out to your hands and give you a hug. It breaks my heart to see you hurting yourself, why are you doing this to yourself? With me, that will stop.

All your scars and insecurities and issues and problems and hatred and tears and sadness, everything will disappear with me. I’m your salvation.

We will meet very soon, I told you what I’m willing to do for you, and slowly I will gain your love. I will be prepared for anything and everything.

I am always watching over you through the screen.