The Evil Within

The Evil Within…

           I am here. With you. In you. Behind you. Everywhere and nowhere. Can you feel me? I never leave you. Ever. You know me. You always have. I see you look to the right. That’s it. I know you feel me. I see it in the way you walk. In the way you look behind as you try to pretend you don’t know I am there. I back off to give you enough space to think I might have left you, but in your mind, you know I am still there. Watching.

           My power over you grows every day, but the time when I am strongest is at night. As the light dwindles from the day, I see your steps grow faster, and in your haste to reach safety, you trip and almost fall down the embankment. My intention was that you would. But because of me, you have developed a bit of caution in the things you do. The places you go. But no matter how hard you try, I will be with you, just out of your reach.

           The light from the day is almost gone. Snuffed out one more time. Will you see another day? I hope so, for I am not finished with you. I will never be finished with you. I see you stop and pull your sweater tight around you as if that might help keep me at bay. You rub your forehead and look behind you once again. There. I am a living thing and I am growing as the night grows. And I know you know it too.

           Your goal is in sight now. I see you quicken your steps in your haste to outrun me, but I will be there when you arrive. And you know that. The house is dark. You hesitate to enter. Did you leave a light on? I know you think so. But you are not sure. I see you look behind once more before you enter. You think you can close the door and keep me out, but that is impossible and we both know that.

           I watch as you enter the house and quickly lock the door. You lean your back to it and close your eyes for a moment. But I am with you. I own you. You will never escape from me. Not in this lifetime.

           I hear you gasp. I see your eyes fly open. You are paralyzed by your mind. Good…good. I know what you are thinking. I see it in your face. You wonder if you might have locked it inside with you. You still cannot move. I see sweat forming on your forehead as you contemplate how you will get out of this. But I am still there watching and waiting as you empower me.

           The light illuminates the room. You found the light switch and for a moment I feel you push me away. I feel how hard it is for you to take a step but you manage to do it. I see you searching around the room with your eyes for something in which to protect yourself. There is no protection from me. And I know you know that.

           You slowly make your way into the kitchen and turn the light on in there. You grab a kitchen knife like that will have any effect on me. I see the hairs are raised on your arms. Just as I planned. I follow you as you move from room to room turning on the lights as you go. There is no hope. I will win. I know this even though my power over you has grown less and less with every light that comes my way. You did this and you will pay.

           I back off for now. I let you feel safe for a short time. But I am not finished with you. I am never finished with you. I sink into the shadows as I watch you pick up your phone and punch in 911 but you do not hit send. I see what you are doing. You think you can beat me at this game and that help will come to save you from me, but that will never happen. We have been playing this game for too long for you to let me go now. I have become part of you.

           The weather is turning. Good…good. This will work in my favor. You hear something fall in another room and instantly I am there. Back with full force as your finger hovers over the ‘send’ button. You grab the knife and the phone as you slowly make your way behind the couch. I grow. You feel me in every nerve of your body. In every breath you take. You know I will win. I always do.

           You hit ‘send’ like I knew you eventually would. I hear your frightened voice as it talks to the dispatcher. You say you think someone is in your house. They will send an officer to check it out and they tell you to remain calm. They will not be in any hurry as this is a call they get from you almost every day. I rule you. I have destroyed your credibility. You have lost your friends and most of your family because of me. Soon you will have no one and it will just be you and me. Here. Together. Forever. I will never leave you and that is your greatest fear.

           The knock on the door sounds and you jump grasping the knife tighter. Will you use it on someone? I know you think so if you have to defend yourself. But I will be there twisting your thoughts until your fear is two-fold. I prey on that in you. You don’t know which danger is worse. The physical threat or the threat of the law. Consequences. I will make sure you don’t forget either. I will keep these thoughts alive long after the officer has gone.

           You sit on the couch as the officer searches the house. He says it is clear. No one is there just like no one is ever there after you place the call. He rolls his eyes as you beg him to check in the attic and the basement. He tells you the open window has been closed and that the wind probably made the noise that you heard. I see the panic in your eyes as he gets ready to leave. You are thinking of the open window. Someone could have come in that way. You know the search was not thorough. It never is.

           You know you cannot sit there forever. It is late and you are tired. You are afraid to sleep. I am still with you. Beside you. I will give you no peace. No rest. You feel my power growing inside you. You think you see a shadow in the hall. I see your panic rise. I tickle the back of your neck and it feels like the finger of death is upon you. Good…good. I have you where I want you.

           There. Right there. I know you see another shadow. Is it me or is it real? I have twisted your thoughts and you cannot separate reality from imagination any longer. I see your fingers clutch the handle of the knife once again. I want more. This is not nearly enough for me. No…not nearly enough. I want blind terror from you and I can make it happen. I move through your mind invading your senses. I make you hear music and you frantically look around. Bach’s Tocatta and Fugue in D Minor. Yes…you were frightened by that one early in life, just as many have been, and you have never forgotten it. I have made sure of that. Run, little mouse. You won’t escape.

           Here I am. Waiting for you to let me overtake you. I am your master now. I make the music continue getting louder and louder. I see you drop the knife and put your hands over your ears trying to shut me out. You back into a closed door and you feel me on the other side. You feel me shake the door trying to get to you. I see the fright on your face. You can almost see me now.

           I have overtaken your senses. All of them. I have never overtaken them all at once. What will you do? I grow as you feed me. You can hear me in the music. You can feel me at your back. Can you smell it? The smell of death. Of blood. Do you remember? I will make sure that you do. I increase the intensity of the music. Wait! You stop. Your hands are still over your ears. Is that someone coming up the basement stairs? You see the door start to open. I grip you with everything I have now. Your scream seems like it will never end. Over and over you scream. I feel you gasp for breath. You can’t take much more. Good…good. You have given yourself over to me. At last.

           They are coming, like they have before. You can’t hear the sirens because the music is too loud and your screaming doesn’t stop like it has before. You are remembering that day, aren’t you? I meant it to be this way. This has been my goal. I knew I would break you. You know you deserve it after what you did. Yes…remember? I know you do. I was born out of your unspeakable act.

Your screams have cut into your vocal chords, but you know they are still coming for you. You knew they would eventually. You knew you would never escape. I make sure you see blood on your hands and clothes just like that other time. You retch from the smell but your stomach is empty. You begin to cough and you don’t know whether to cover your ears or your nose. I see you moving quickly from room to room looking for a place to hide, but you won’t find any solace.

They are at the door now. Shouting your name. Trying to break in. People have gathered on your lawn. Some look worried. Others just say they aren’t surprised at anything that goes on in your house. The door is broken now. Kicked in by those you called for help. I have you backed into a corner. Nowhere to go now. You have picked up the knife. Good…good. I know the moment that you realize what you must do.

Hurry! You must be quick. They are almost upon you! I see you grab the knife and hold it in front of you like you held it in front of him. He begged for mercy but you gave him none. There will be no mercy for you now. You plunge the knife into your gut like you did to him. Yes. You have done this before. You know how it ends. Your mouth is open in a silent scream. Your bloodshot eyes are bulging. You fall to the side.

Many are there now. But they are too late. I have won like I knew I would. I played the game through to the end. Your end. You got the ending you deserved. I made it so. You always knew I would. I back away. I have done my job.

They have gone. All that remains now is the blood you spilled. I am but a memory. Someone is coming. Who would be here? Yes…curiosity seekers. Young people. I wait. They come in looking for a good scare. Little do they know the horror that I can create. They squeal at the sight of the blood. They run laughing out the door. They got what they came for. All except for…one.

She is riveted to the spot. Equally drawn and abhorred by the sight of the blood and knowing that death ruled this house a short time ago. She gasps when a branch hits the window. She backs away and almost falls over in her haste to get away. I grow quickly. I move over her.

 She looks behind her. Good, good…you know me too…