You betrayed me....

    It has been eight years since I have heard from any of my family. They each cut ties with me back when I was ten, but I had no clue it would go this deep. It started with my mom and then my dad, and so forth. Maybe it was destined for things to be that way, or maybe I was very disliked by my family. I would never know because I could never speak to them. My name is Lilly and I am now eighteen years old, I have been living alone by myself from ten years old to now. I have yet to hear from any family, but why should I care. I was left behind, alone to perish away like how my beautiful grandmother did. I cried every single night when we lost her, she was the one person I could confide in the most. But good things always have to come to an end right? That is the sad truth but we as people can't seem to grasp that truth behind it. Maybe I am just too pessimistic or maybe I am too much of a realist. But who cares at this point, I have lost too many people to care, even the one family member who betrayed me. They left me just like the others and I will never forget that moment.     

     On the day of March 30th, I was just leaving my area of living, I wouldn't call this my home because a home is more comforting. I would rather call it my space, because nothing in my space was reassuring. I had nothing but lost memories and tear stained pillows, from when I would have my cry sesh. But they made me feel good, I was releasing what I would call my balloons. These bottled up emotions fill up like a balloon with air, and they would pop just as a balloon being hit with a needle would. Anyways as I left that morning, I met up with my third cousin named Susie and she was someone who met me when I was fourteen. She doesn't know about how my family treated me or about my past, she just knows that I had a good childhood. She would come pick me up in the mornings and we would go hang out together. She was the only family I had left and she was like my mentor. I would follow her lead and she would teach me about the wonders of this world. I looked up to her, and she was someone I could trust and lean on, but I did not know that today would be the last time I trusted her.    

     Susie took me to this place that afternoon of March 30th, It was a place that looked somewhat abandoned. The ceilings were broken and the floors were torn, this place looked so awful. She told me she wanted to take me somewhere cool, but this area was far from cool to me. It had this wretched stench that would burn your nose. But since I was with her I trusted that nothing would happen to me and I would be fine. That was until she pushed me to ground with all her force nearly knocking me out. She stood above me and said “ You know I love you okay, but you are such a liar” I didn't know what she was talking about. “ What do you mean I'm a liar what have I lied to you about '', I said out of pure sadness. “ You know what I am talking about, you lied to me about your past” she says “ you lied to me saying that you had an amazing childhood”. I did not understand why this made her feel so upset, At this point I was so confused. Susie pulled out this really sharp object and pushed it up to my neck and said “ If you confide in me and trust me like you say, you would have told me, It hurts that you did not tell me”, I start to cry and my mouth stays shut. She then gets up and kicks me, and leaves the area without looking back. I watch her leave the scene with tears filled in my eyes and my heart heavy. I didn't know what to do, I was so shocked and hurt that she would do something like this to me. “WHY ME, WHAT DID I DO” I scream asking the heavens why this happened to me in my life.   

    I will never understand why she was so upset, because I truly would have told her but it would have been no use. I did not want her pity or her remorse, I just wanted to feel loved and cared for. But it seems as if she wanted something different, or maybe she just wanted my information to tell someone else. “ I HATE YOU!!” I scream aloud hoping she would hear me in the distance. I wanted her to hear the hatred in my voice and I wanted her to hear how hurt I was. I couldn't believe she did this to me, I will never forgive her for this. She had left me just like everyone else in my life has, I was betrayed by someone I could trust. At this point in my life I gave up on trying to have someone to trust in and I gave up on the hope of love. I sat there for a long while and didn't get up for days, I sat there contemplating what my life has become and what it would be. I hoped that someone from the heavens would save me because everyone in my life has betrayed me. I wanted to leave this place but I no longer felt the need to get up, I stayed put and didn't move. I stiffly sat my neck up and looked at the sky and whispered ever so lightly “ you betrayed me” and closed my eyes.