A CHRISTMAS TO REMEMBER

The sound of my drumming feel the whole house though am not a good singer but I no good songs when I hear them and I could play drums to them. The sound of good drums seems to always find it way into my heart and soul to give me a good feeling. Eventhough the sound of my drumming feel so sweet within me right now but it is just sounding like rain trodden clay mould to people hearing it because my drums are really old which makes the sweet sound I feel in my heart messed up in people's hear.

I remember when I first bought the drums then in high school with the money from a part time job, I was really happy and overjoyous the new smell of the drums find it way to my soul which bring out the passion in me I drum like no tomorrow but right now I could only feel the good sound within me, not from the sound of the drums because my drums are too old to give such sweet sounds they are only making unwanted noise but I still keep drumming, what can I do? Am a drummer I love drumming very much, some people will say how will someone love drumming? Because I also love music, drumming to songs always awaken my soul and spirit but to drum I need a good drum and right now my drums are too old to fulfil the dreams in me.

My name is Esan Divya, am a lady and from a rich home. When I was young my mom use to take me to the church and when I hear drums the feeling and passion in me will arose and start dancing, I discover each time my mom take me to church it was always like that and to me the feeling feels so good since then I secretly go to where the drums were kept after service to see for myself. When I come of age I start learning how to drum in school without my parent's knowledge then the passion in me push me further, I join music band in school and I play drums for them eventhough am a girl, people are always surprised because as a girl I know how to drum but I can't sing, before I was also bothered about that fact but when I continue to grow up I could not be bothered with some like that anymore because I know drumming is my passion. My band and I continue to go for outings and play, sometimes on the street secretly without my parent's knowledge I was unable to tell my parents because am afraid they will stop me from going after my passion, to my father I am a princess and I should be treated as one and for me not to disappoint my dad I pretend to be a princess at home and a drummer at school.

But my mom later find out that I go for outings and I drum eventhough am a girl, she is not that surprise when she discover because she said she already knew that I drum but she pretend not to know. After she find out she told me to stop drumming because it will be a turg of war if my father find out that I go to outings and drum as a girl because my dad is a reputable person in the country, I become very sad thinking about what will happen if my dad find out that I drum so I stop drumming for a week but this feeling is so good that I can't just leave it and the passion in me will not leave so I went back to my band and continue to pretend like a princess at home until my dad find out when myself and my band were recorded and exposed online it was indeed a turg of war.

Dad was really so angry and his final say was that I leave drumming or I stop been his daughter, my mom cried and pleaded with him but my dad will not take a no for an answer, as young as I am then I know that nothing will be able to separate me from my passion which is drumming so I chose not to be my dad's daughter and pursue my dreams I had to move out of the house and quit going to school. Because I was underage my mom was really sad and she become very sick, I had to start working part time at a convenience store and then go for outings, I stay with one of my friends. It was part of the money I got from the part time job that i use to purchase my drums, my mom's sickness got worst because my dad did not allow her see me, when she was about to die I went to the hospital to see her, I cried so much because it seems that I am the cause my mom's death I always blame myself for that though but nothing could be done now, on my mom's death bed she told me never to let go of my dreams I was really happy that my mom last wish Is for me to fulfil my dreams then I see my dreams as my mom's dreams so I continue to pursue it eventhough my dad still did not want to see me after my mom's death.

I continue to work without going to school and doing my thing which is drumming with my band but after high school our band got dissolved or let me say everyone of us went our separate ways and i also moved out of my friend's place to get a place for myself to manage since I can now leave on my own, since I don't have money or anyone to depend on I continue to work and try to do something with my passion but it seems I have make the wrong choice, but what can I do? It's my choice anyway but right now am going to enjoy myself in anyway.

That day one of my friends a guy from our high school band send a message to me through email it was in the holiday and Christmas was fast approaching, he said he lost my contact and that he want to invite me to a musical concert, when I saw the message I did not want to go because it been five years we all seperated and am still in that small room with my old drums trying to make ends meet to feed myself I could not even pursue my so called passion anymore, but since it is in the holiday I decided to go and enjoy myself because it been so long I attend any musical concert, I took my bag and off I go.

I only want to have the feeling of good music and sounds of good drums since the sound of the drums I have been hearing in the last five years is from my old drums, "I think it will really feel good" I said to myself eventhough I don't have the transport fee to go the musical concert since it is in the next town I wake up early to join a truck going to the place, sitting on the truck I could feel good breeze the feeling of freshness find their ways to me because I only go to work and back to my small room everyday to play my old drums, after the truck drop me I walk for sometime before I get into the town. When I got there I pick my phone to call this my friend to know where the concert will be holding since he send his number with the message, he sent the venue to me and I use the saving I had to get a place to manage for that night that is the only money left with me more reason I could not avoid transport. The musical concert was on Christmas Eve, that night I just put on my old clothes and went to the venue, my friend met me at the entrance because he has been waiting to meet with me he was surprised that I did not change at all and I was also surprised because is now a big person he bring me into the hall for the concert and I sat down I think he already take care of the tickets. When it was time to start the concert the band did not seems to be coming out, everyone present at the concert were already waiting then my friend suddenly come to me and bring me to the back of the stage "Divya we have a problem" he said, I look at him with surprise "what problem?" I ask "the drummer could not make it and everyone are already waiting" Ryan said, I did not seems to understand why he was telling me about it "Divya I know you are good, can you fill in?" Ryan ask me, I smirk because I don't know the song nor was I prepared to do anything like that and also I have not been doing this for five years "sorry Ryan I can't do this" I told him, Ryan become so sad "Divya eventhough everyone think of you as a girl I think of you as a drummer" the words of Ryan seems to bring back my lost hope and passion I blink my eyes because I don't know what to say "Divya I know you will be fine" Ryan told me, when I think about it for sometime I decided to fill in for the drummer.

When we get on stage I was really nervous because I already lost all hope about me as a drummer but remembering my mom I know I have to do this I have to fulfil my mom's last wish since her dream is my dream, though I don't know the songs but since I was already informed about the songs I first feel the drums before I start playing, I could feel the difference between my old drums and this new drums. I play with my heart and flow with the songs because the passion is in me always carry me, everyone sitted was surprised that a lady could be playing drums that good, I could feel the joy, the happiness and my lost hope coming back to me. The musical concert went really well and everyone start praising me, I was really happy. When we finish the concert I really feel that coming to the concert is so good then I was ask to join the band, I could not believe my ears because it seems not to be true but it is a dream come true since the band is a popular band I will have to leave with the band and fulfil my dreams and passion I have no options but to say yes so I sign the agreement. I came back to my place because I was given a week to join the band, I came back to my old drums and I play them though it sound like noise to people around but it plays good in my heart since it a Christmas to remember.