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Adventure

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Mr Wilton sat at his counter impatiently, waiting for a customer to come and check out a book from his library. He opened his rusty, leather journal, browsing through the books borrowed. His index finger stopped on one book, β€˜The Little Red Balloon’, it was called. The book was borrowed for a whole month now, by Lyn Brook, a girl in 7th Grade and if she didn’t return it, she would have to pay $10.00 as a fine. His library would close by 6:30 that evening. He looked at his antique, 19th-century clock, it was 5:42 so he lay back on his chair, cleaning the finger smudges on his glasses.


Meanwhile, Lyn raced to the library, the humid summer wind pushing against her face as she ran straight into it, as the clock in Mr Wilton’s library ticked 6:08. She pushed open the door, letting it slam behind her, then tried to catch her breath.

β€œHello Mr Wilton”, she panted, giving the man a wave.

He looked up from his rimless glasses and smiled.

β€œHi Lyn, have you brought the book back?”, he asked,

β€œOh, yes I did bring it!”, she pulled out a small book and laid it on the counter. Mr Wilton ticked it off in his journal, grabbed the book and placed it on a shelf.


Lyn went over to another bookshelf on the other side of the room. Out of all the books, one of them caught her attention. It was red with green strokes, dusty and old. She pulled it out, examining it. The book had a lock and a key, β€˜Into the Future”, it read. Lyn looked at it for another moment before carrying it over to the counter.


β€œUm, excuse me, Mr Wilton, can I please borrow this book?”, Lyn asked.

β€œUm ok?”, Mr Wilton grabbed the book and took a scan of the QR code.

β€œThanks, Mr Wilton!”, Lyn nodded, swiped her card and dumped her book in her schoolbag, then gave the man the last wave before heading out the door.


The sun was still blazing at 6:34pm, a typical Australian summer and Lyn felt all sticky and sweaty, that the uncomfortable feeling urged her to take a shower once she got home. Tying back her dishevelled sweaty auburn hair, Lyn opened the book while she walked down the cheery streets of the sunny Gold Coast towards home. The fresh summer breeze was blowing on her face, the green, lush gumtrees towered over her. Lyn decided to collect a few of the leaves so she simply walked off the sidewalk and reached over to the lowest branch and grabbed a sweet-smelling handful of 5. Carefully slitting the leaves, she took a great whiff of the gum leaf.


Stuffing the leaves into the pocket of her navy-blue sports uniform, passing a mother pushing a pram of a 2-year-old. Whipping out her mum’s old phone which was now Lyn’s special possession she received for her birthday last September. Opening up her mum’s contact, Lyn typed a quick message, informing her mum that she was on the way home and that she dropped off her books. Lyn waited for a quick response from her mum like most do, but the screen of her phone stayed still. Lyn rolled her eyes and stuffed her phone back into her pocket.

β€œWhy bother?”, She thought and continued down the path.


Lyn’s home was a white modern house you would normally see, except she lived right in front of Surfers Paradise Beach. Opening the front door, she pulled off her dirty shoes and laid them on the shoe rack. Dumped her bag by the door, Lyn washed her hands in the kitchen, scrubbing into her dirt-filled fingernails. Mum was in the study room, sipping her coffee and typing away on her laptop. Dad was in the lounge, talking on his β€˜important’ calls that he didn’t even notice, Lyn comes back home.


The only being in the house that greeted her that evening was her dog, Luna a German Shepherd.

β€œHi, Luna!” Exclaimed Lyn ruffling the 3-month-old dog.

She went upstairs to the bathroom and took a long shower, scrubbing away at the sweatiness with goat soap and her favourite coconut shampoo. She loved the divine smell of the shampoo that she spent some time in the shower making coconut bubbles. Lyn knew it felt much better to be clean and, in your pyjamas, than to be in some uncomfortably itchy school uniform and dirty shoes.


By then, mum was in the kitchen making dinner and dad watching some news on the TV. She strode up to the door of her room and slammed it shut,

β€œDumb, useless TV”, she muttered, then settled herself into her chair and grabbed her homework books that lay stacked to the corner. Unzipping her newly customised pencil-case, Lyn grabbed her blue ballpoint pen and started to do her science assignment on chemistry and read the assigned article her teacher, Mrs Mays had given.


It was 7:00 by the time she had finished off her work. Usually, she would go downstairs and watch a bit of TV or play video games for half an hour but this time, she decided to use that half an hour to read the new book that she had borrowed. Of course, she had been so caught up with it that she didn’t notice that her mum was calling her. Putting aside the book, she ran downstairs to help set up the table. It was boiled broccoli, carrots and peas with some potato mash and corn to the sides for dinner. Normally, she would take forever to eat and would end up being the last one to get up from the table but this time, she ended up being the first.

β€œDessert?” asked mum, pointing to the bowl of choc chip cookie ice-cream with maraschino cherries on top.

β€œUh, I’ll have it in my room”, Lyn grabbed the bowl and went back upstairs.


She opened the book and continued reading, flipping through every page with excitement, taking a scoop out of her dessert every 2 minutes.

She kept reading it until 8:30, her bedtime so she placed her book open on her desk and went to the bathroom to brush her teeth. Then went downstairs with an empty bowl and placed it in the sink.

β€œNight mum and dad”, she yawned and headed back upstairs.

Her parents who were on their phones just grunted. Giving Luna a cuddle and putting her in her bed in the lounge before she switched off her lights and fell asleep. Her parents headed to their room 20 mins later, switching off all the glowing lights. The clock in the hallway ticked 9:00, Lyn was fast asleep, but she didn’t know that the book that lay on her desk was glowing, opening up a portal.


Lyn was lost in her dreams, dreams of becoming a professional writer and artist. She felt hope that her dreams would come true, after all, she loved to write and had written numerous stories which were complimented greatly. In her bedroom, she had graceful paintings on the plain white walls. She had hope that it would come true.


Lyn’s eyes snapped open as she heard a noise coming from downstairs.

β€œProbably just a broom…”, she muttered then reached for her phone, her eyes began to water and strain as she checked the time.

But her attention turned to the book, it was glowing brightly, slightly illuminating the room.

β€œWeird”, she mumbled then crept up to the book, peering at it carefully.

β€œLet’s see...”, Lyn grabbed a pencil and let it go into the book.

β€œOops…”, Lyn stuck her finger in, no pain. Carefully, she stuck her hand in, then her head and the rest of her body, and went tumbling down.


Lyn’s head was pounding, bubbling and boiling. Her eyes were shut unable to be opened and her back and elbows left in a blistering and stinging pain. Her fingers felt a jolt, almost an electric shot. Lyn sat right up; she felt a chill go through her. She was on the beach; the waves were lapping up on the shore, the wind was definitely not warm or humid like a normal Queensland summer day. The sea stank of dead fish, clogging Lyn’s nose, almost suffocating her.Β 


Lyn felt a stinging sensation near her eyebrow and something wet coming down her eye. Her dirty, sandy finger touched her eyebrow. Lyn gasped,

β€œBlood…”. Wiping the drooling blood on her sleeve, she slowly limped towards the corner of the beach. Her slippers had ripped at the soles and were incredibly uncomfortable.


Lyn spotted her house, it was standing there, dead silent. In front of Lyn’s gravel driveway, she spotted a car, a blue car. The car had its bright golden lights on, but it was silent. Lyn peered into the car, there was a lady, possibly in her twenties. What Lyn found fascinating was that she looked like herself, the same auburn hair, sea-green eyes and the same jade choker she had gotten for her 10th birthday was wrapped around her neck.


β€œThat’s the future me!”, gasped Lyn, peering at her future self.

But the Lyn in the car had her eyes full of tears, and in her hands was a newspaper.


β€œWorst story is written in the history of writing, Lyn Brooke could have done better”, was the headline of the newspaper...

September 04, 2020 09:36

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40 comments

Awesome story! The end was so sad...but great job! Keep writing!

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No problem! (Sorry for the late response) Also, would you mind checking out my latest story? Thanks!

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Lol don’t mind me, just upvoting, but idk it’s kinda fun seeing a conversation between us but half a year ago instead of now πŸ˜… Although most of the comments on this story are in the negatives or at 0 so ugh

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Hello!!! Haha, that's nice of you, I'll do the same!!! Tru...

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02:37 Sep 05, 2020

Very nice story, SS!! I really enjoyed reading it. Good jobπŸ‘πŸ‘

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Thank you so much Deepshikha! I'm glad you enjoyed my story!

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02:44 Sep 05, 2020

You're welcome:) P.S. Thanks for including me in your bio!!

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02:47 Sep 05, 2020

Thankssssss!!!! I updated my bio, have a look at it.

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01:07 Sep 05, 2020

Ooh, nice story! I love the creativity and the storyline was amazing. If I were to give feedback I'd say you could maybe add more similes (my absolute favourite thing in writing) descriptive words. Such as- for 'cleaning the finger smudges on his glasses.' you could so this. 'Gracefully, he smudged the fingerprints off his glasses. The lenses like a raindrop falling from the sky. Glistening in the moonlight, sparkling it vanishes from sight.' I really don't know if this helps but I hope it does! ~Your fellow writer Sarah

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Thank you so much! This was so helpful! I'll definitely include more similes!

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01:15 Sep 05, 2020

Glad it helped! 😊

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Megan Sutherland
00:00 Sep 30, 2020

Great story, SS! I really liked the storyline and the plot here. I think you have some grammatical errors- specifically, where you place commas and quotation marks. Other than that, this was perfect. For that Pottermore website you mention in your bio, do you have a Silver membership? If so does that cost anything? Thanks! -Megan S.

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Oh, thank you so much, Megan! So nice of you! I'll take that advice, thanks! With Pottermore, no there is no money paying stuff, just your email! Happy Writing! ~SS

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Megan Sutherland
11:31 Sep 30, 2020

Thanks! Of course!

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Megan Sutherland
22:32 Sep 30, 2020

:)

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Syeda Fatima
00:09 Sep 07, 2020

wow!! the last line was so.... awesome and twisty! I love the plot of this story and how you describe your character Lyn

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Thank you so much, Syeda! I really enjoy describing things for some reason!

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Lulu Lemon
17:49 Sep 05, 2020

Great job!! This story was super creative! I would like Part 2 sometime! You abbreviated a few things (choc for example) that might have sounded better if it were the full thing but other then that I really liked this story! Great job!

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Thank you so much! I'll see if I can make a part 2!

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Lulu Lemon
23:37 Sep 05, 2020

No problem! And ok!

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I was actually thinking about her trying to get back to the present would be the aim of part 2. For now, I just have to wait for a suitable prompt to pass by.

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Avery G.
00:40 Sep 05, 2020

Wow, this was good! I really liked it! Great job!

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Wow! I loved your story, it really dragged me in. One piece of constructive feedback, Maybe don't use the word 'Lyn' too much. You used it A LOT when you were talking about her time at the house, maybe include more of 'she' or 'her'! I also agree with Sarah. H about adding similes. Other than that, It was amazing! I loved the description you put into this and great work, keep it up! ~Rachel

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