A Love That Never Really Happened

Miranda stopped dead in her tracks when she saw him on the sidewalk walking in her direction. She had not seen or thought of Mark in a few years, but here he was just strolling down the street when she happened to be back in town.

“Let’s get together and catch up,” Mark suggested. Miranda’s heart gave a little flutter. She had always admired him, but things were never in their favor when they encountered one another.

Back in high school, Miranda had a crush on Mark, but he had a girlfriend. Not only did he have a girlfriend, but he also intended to marry her. Miranda and Mark had become friends and spent many nights on the phone just chatting and enjoying one another’s company. She loved the comfort she felt in telling him anything that came to mind.

They had been young, and he may have had some feelings for her as well. They started to get together now and then, and one night, he kissed her. She knew it didn’t mean anything. But it felt nice. However, when he came to her one night and suggested something more, she could not do it. She knew he was going to marry Kelly. Plus, she was a virgin and not about to give that up in a clandestine encounter that would not mean anything. She was still in high school and had plenty of time to find “the one.”

The chance encounter years later brought back memories and perhaps even some feelings. Miranda looked forward to being able to “catch up,” and Mark, through devastating circumstances, was single again. When he married Kelly, he knew it would not last forever. She was sick. She did not have a long life to live.

Miranda was nervous as she was getting ready though she really had no expectations of what the night would bring.

Mark picked her up, and they had a great time reconnecting as they walked around town enjoying the balmy evening.

“Hey,” he said. “Can I tell you something?”

“Of course,” Miranda replied.

“Well, I was never going to not marry Kelly, so I feel awful about what happened when we were younger.”

“It’s water under the bridge. We were kids. I knew you were going to marry her.”

“So, you’re not mad?”

“Not at all!”

Miranda and Mark ended up back at his place. Miranda could not help herself. She wrapped him in a big bear hug and just held him.

In his bashful way, Mark asked, “do you wanna make out?” There was no question in Miranda’s mind that she wanted to make out. She was recently divorced and embarking on a new life. And it can be fun to mix the old with the new. For her, the night ended far too soon.

Miranda had to go back to the new life she had started in another town, and she was sad to be leaving. But she hoped she would see Mark again one day.

The next time she returned to the city where she grew up, she contacted Mark to see if they could have another catch-up session. He agreed, and she went over to his house. However, she was disappointed when she found out he had a girlfriend. He was at a point in his life where he was hoping it would be a long-term relationship. Even though she knew it was crazy, Miranda had tears in her eyes as she left him.

Over the years, they saw each other on occasion. The physical aspect of their relationship progressed now and then, and at other times it did not due to other relationship circumstances. It seemed they were never in the same place at the same time when it came to the dating game.

Miranda liked memories. She often thought of Mark and the fun they had when they were together. She struggled with separating emotions and their physical relationship because she loved both.

“Hey,” Mark had said during one encounter. “I wrote a book of poems if you want to read it.”

“I’d love to!”

He handed her a copy. “You are in one of them,” he told her. “After you read it, see if you know which one it is.”

Miranda was surprised. Maybe at some point, somewhere along the line, he did have feelings for her. But she knew how silly that was. They had known each other for 20 years already, and he had never said he cared at all. Then again, she had not said anything of the sort to him either. She read the poems and recognized the one she was in right away. Mark must like memories too. The poem mentioned the time they had been walking across a railway bridge when a train thundered down the tracks shaking the pedestrian walkway. They had been locked in an embrace and enjoying a passionate kiss.

As more years passed, the two lost touch again. Mark remarried, and Miranda had been in a long-term relationship for several years.

But, when she returned to her hometown again, she could not resist getting in touch with Mark. He was divorced, and Miranda was not happy in her relationship.

Miranda and Mark got together again and had a great visit over supper. He had a band practice later that evening, and she asked if she could tag along. He’d played in a band since high school, and she had always loved hearing them play.

After the practice, Miranda went to Mark’s place. All she could think about was his bashfulness the time he asked her if she wanted to fool around. There was no asking this time. She leaned in and kissed him.

When she returned to her real life, she was heartbroken. Things were just never going to be the way she often dreamed about.

Miranda could not figure out why she could not get him out of her head. It was not meant to be, and yet...she hoped. She would cry herself to sleep at night, imagining being in Mark’s arms. It was not even about the physical relationship. She felt like she knew him, and despite often being apart, she felt close.

She laughed at herself when she thought about meeting him in an old folk’s home one day. They would talk and laugh, and both would wonder why they never tried to have a life together. At least she hoped they both would.