I don't wanna be free

A girl, looking to be not more than 17 years old, sits at the window seat of an airplane. She looks nervously out to the puffy white clouds and patches of blue sky. She had not relaxed, sitting on edge for since the plane had taken off that the man next to her had begun to take notice.

The man, around his 50s named Greyson, seeing her anxiety also started to get anxious as he had never flown before and had sung a few gospel songs in his mind as he was boarding.

A few moments later, he pushed down his headset to cradle around his neck and cleared his throat somewhat noisily. She didn't even make a movement. He did not want to startle her but he wanted to communicate. He pulled a small pad and pencil from his suit pocket and started writing.

"Hey... er. Little Miss." He gently poked her elbow pressed into the arm rest. He handed her the note which said Is there something wrong with the plane?

"OH my God. Is there something wrong with the plane?" She voiced to everyone. "Did you do something???"

"Oh NO. No." He waves his hands vehemently denying it, "I was asking."

"Is something wrong with the plane?" The passenger in front of them turns to ask the man.

"There's nothing wrong. I was just asking." The man tells him.

"So you know something?" Another person interjects, "How much engines do we have? Are the engines working?"

"Flight attendant! The engines aren't working and you let me on here?" Someone from first class stomps in from behind the curtain.

"And who the hell is you?" A lady in a brown dress asks the first class 'celebrity'

"I'm famous enough"

"Does anyone watch him?"

The majority of passengers shake their head, yelling some No's at the entitled 'celeb.'

Greyson catches one of the flight attendants trying to calm down the crowd and whispers something into her ear over the commotion. The flight attendant then ignores the rest of the rowdy passengers heading for the PA system.

"Ladies and Gentlemen, there's a misunderstanding here. I can assure you from the pilot himself that there is nothing to worry about. The engines are in perfect condition and a passenger was merely worried, having some flight induced anxiety. Please refrain from believing information from other passengers. If there are safety concerns, we will notify you and help you prepare -."

"So there is something to worry about."

"I said IF, I would advise you to turn on your hearing aid sir and IF you do not happen to have a hearing aid, I would advise you to take a Masterclass on listening skills." The flight attendant turns her attention to the restless passengers, "There's nothing wrong with the plane and if you do not believe me, the bar will be open shortly."

Greyson turns to the frozen girl and rephrases his question more carefully and more paced, "Why are you looking so nervous? First time flying?"

"No." She furrows her brows at the man.

"I should have said this earlier but you looking nervous, makes me kind of nervous." Greyson admits, he shrugs, "I just want to help. That's all. You look like you want to talk to someone."

"I do." The girl answers, "Not you though."

"Okay, fair enough." Greyson nods, "But you are okay right?"

"No I'm not okay." She shakes her head slightly annoyed that Greyson is still talking.

"What seems to ail you then?"

"Nothing."

"I have daughters, it's never nothing." Greyson tells her, "Oh, you probably think I'm flirting with you but that's not my -."

"Dude, no. " She stops him right there, "If I tell you will you stop bothering me?"

"Yes." Greyson nods, "You won't hear a peep out of me."

"I'm running away." She tells him, "My parents are finding out that I left probably now and I can't help but think I can't go back."

"Oh is that all?"

"Oh is that all?" She mocks him.

"You can totally go back." He tells her, "If I know parents and I am one, I would just be glad that you are home safe."

"That's you - not my parents." She admits, "Mine would kill me."

"How many movie - tv shows have you heard that one from?" He mocks, "My parents will kill me blah. - They don't. They give you a hug and they welcome you back. You might be a flight risk to them now so you'll probably be grounded but - that's it."

"Why do you think that every parent is a great parent - you didn't even think for once that maybe they abuse me?" She shrugs, "Or something."

"You're wearing short sleeves and I could see you have no bruising, no cuts. Your hands look soft except for the corn on your ring finger but that's maybe from writing and/or studying. Your hair is short -"

"What does that have to do with anything."

"Might sound superficial but if you're being abused and molested, you wouldn't have fresh bob cut, I'd think more split ends and long hair and there's not enough fear in your eyes for that." He adds, "You're mostly worried about something."

"Well I am worried," She sighs, "I just passed my exams."

"And you didn't want to?"

"No I did but nothing could satisfy my parents you know. I could come home with full marks and the highest GPA and they'd always ask -How come you didn't do better?" She leans on the seat's back rest, "They adore my brother. He didn't pass any exams. He is lazy. He is boisterous. But he could just fix everything that is broken in the house and my parents - they brag and brag and brag about him and I get praised for the one thing I didn't want to do in the first place."

"What do you mean?" Greyson persists, "What's your name by the way."

"Jo." She replies hesitantly.

"Nice to meet you."

"And you?"

"Greyson." He tips an invisible hat, "Go on, don't let me distract you."

"I've been a musician for all my life because that's what my parents wanted me to do." She admits, "They wanted me to be a gospel musician, is what they tell me all the time - I must play the piano in church and I must work hard at it but I hate it - and I've taken all the exams and passed them with mediocrity and they still want me to pursue it cause they are a musical family. And it's never - Here is my daughter Jo. she is pursuing a Bachelor's in Accounting at one of the top universities in the country - it's Here's Jo, the musician who has talent but is lazy." She scoffs, "That's all I am to them - lazy, lackluster, incompetent little girl whose brother has all the skills in the world and is the best child that they could ask for."

Greyson nods, writing in his pad, "And how does this make you feel?"

"Inferior, incompetent and worthless." She continues, "The whole nine yards of crap."

"But I feel better."

"I feel... neutral."

"That's an upgrade from anxiety." He surmises, "Just go home to your parents and talk to them."

"They don't listen."

"I'm sure they do."

"No they don't." She shakes her head, "Everytime I try to say something serious, they don't listen ... they don't listen like you do."

"I have a wife."

"Lord!" She exclaims, "I'm not hitting on you - alright you try to be me, and I'll be my parents."

"Alright." Greyson thinks, putting on a high voice, "I'm a 16 year old girl."

"Ugh. No, I am 19 and I do not sound like that."

"... I'm a 19 year old girl." He continues in the same voice.

She sighs, "Joanna where is your report card?" She mimes grabbing a report card, "Full marks - 100 out of a 100. Why couldn't you get 101? When I was in school - my teacher gave me more marks than everyone."

"She was probably high from all the radioactive material that was around when you were a kid."

"... What the hell?"

"If you can't fight them, confuse them."

"Then how will my problems be solved?" She cries, "I have to talk to them and figure it out right? This is the only way - the have a serious conversation and make some changes."

"You can talk at them till your jaw falls off." Greyson shrugs, "They don't want serious conversations - they don't want to understand, they just want you out of their hair with a good job and their religious expectations. They're not gonna cater to your needs cause you are a teenager. No matter what you say right now - you are gonna sound entitled - but guess what. You have a home at home - food, a bed and people who know you. And I know people like them - tough love is love."

"How do you know?"

"My parents are comedians." He grins, "Nah, there's bank tellers but they could be comedians if they wanted to. Point is - your parents are proud of you but all the attention needs to go to your brother cause they know you're going to be alright in life."

"Why don't they just say that then?"

"Cause people don't like to have serious conversations." He tells her, "Cause they don't know how."

---

A few moments later, Jo is sitting at a cafeteria in the airport, unsure of what to do next. She sees her family in the distance, they reach over to her, stopping short of 2 feet in front of her. The awkwardness is apparent. She can see in her mother's pocket, the note she wrote is peeking out.

"I just wanted to fly on an airplane." She starts.

"Well next time, just wait and we'll carry you." Her dad shakes his head, breaking into a grin.

"And what - wait a year?" She continues, letting out a breath of relief that they aren't yelling at her.

"If you hurry up and get a job, you can carry us instead -." He dad jokes. " Hun, let's go log her into the flight risk list one time."

Her parents collect her luggage, looking for the exit. Her mother, doesn't say anything but discretely takes away her daughter's passport.