The Last Love Story

The Last Love Story

Suzanne Marsh

I wouldn't marry you if you the last person on this earth!” She took off her engagement ring, tossing it at my head. It the last time I thought I would ever encounter Lisa Poopiepot.

You know, you would think that she would have wanted to change her name to something else, anything other than Poopiepot. I thought Mrs. Lisa Smith had a really nice sound to it, apparently she did not. I wondered if I would ever find another girl like her. Solid, beautiful and fearless.

That was how we first met. I am a hard core survivalist, she was attending the same meeting that I was on survival techniques. That is why it seemed so natural, at least to me, that we belonged together. I even proposed and she accepted. The big fight we had that night had absolutely nothing to do with survival, except maybe mine. She was having an affair with another member of our survivalist team. I caught them, confronted her. Evidently she did not like being confronted about anything in general.

I moved on with my life, as I was sure that she did. We parted going our separate ways. That was Christmas of 2018. 2019 arrived; I began working on my bunker. I knew I was going to need it soon. This was going to be the ultimate bunker. It was underground, with thick cement walls. I moved my furniture into the bunker at the end of September. It was so peaceful, when the wind whips up in central Texas it is difficult to concentrate on anything else but the wind. I was well stocked with all types of food so I would not find myself in a quandary when the pandemic or some other disaster began. Then in December the first rumblings about a pandemic began. March of 2020, businesses were shutting down. People began to self isolate, in hopes that the “made in China virus” would be stopped before it took over the entire world.

That is essentially what happened during the winter of 2020. People don't listen, the millennial thought they were invincible. Colleges closed, some forever. Things were becoming desperate. The hospitals were short of ventilators, doctors and nurses. Food was becoming scarce. I had all of that covered. I watched as toilet paper disappeared completely, then water. Food, was still available but I at very inflated prices. Most people began to hunt their food, thinning the deer population. I was beginning to worry about ever entering the outside world again. I am twenty five and very vigorous, even if I do say so myself. I am in the prime of my life. I ventured out there were no cars on I35 which my property borders. That seemed so strange since it was the busiest interstate in Texas.

I quickly went back into my bunker, I did not want to be mistaken for a deer or anything other than a human being. I did have a huge fifty inch wall television. I decided it might be a good idea for me to watch CNN. I had not been watching the news especially CNN the news was to depressing. I turned to CNN, the commentator began with an address by the President, stating that Europe, China, Southeast Asia, Australia were all closed. People were dying at an incredible rate from the Chinese Virus. Planes were not flying. The United States, Canada and Mexico had all closed their borders hoping to somehow contain this virus. Nothing was working, a vaccine was helping but not enough people realized that it was also very important to self isolate.

The following morning, I was rousted out of bed by Marcus, my German Shepherd. Something was happening outside of my bunker. I had all the doors double bolted and voltage running into the bolts. No one would be able to enter without my prior knowledge. I ran over to the computer to scan whoever was outside. My parents were out there. Dad looked gray and mom was not to far behind. They did not try to enter:

“Son, we are ill with the virus, we just came to say goodbye and good luck. We love you.”

They turned and were gone. I felt sick, knowing I could not do anything other than stay put. A small part of me wanted to run after them but they would have told me to return to the bunker and stay put until this situation was rectified. I had extra cloth masks and I had given them several apparently they did not use them.

I sat in my bunker and cried that night. I would miss my parents but I also knew that if I came out of the bunker to soon, I would be joining them on heavens shores. CNN began to show pictures of Europe so very few people were left. I was afraid that things would go from bad to worse within a very short period of time. In China, there were no people left or so the CNN broadcast stated. The North Korean government was now merging with South Korea in hopes that they could keep a few people alive to restart their race. This was beginning to seem as if I were in The Stand by Stephen King, that virus was the trip virus. It seemed no different than the Chinese Virus that was doing the same thing except the reality of the situation was that it was happening before my eyes.

I knew that before long there would be no more people left here on earth. I would be at least until my food supply ran out that would be in another fifty five years if I were smart about things in general. I began to dream about Lisa Poopiepot, wondering if she had built that bunker she was always talking about. She called it her “Lady Bunker” although she was no lady. I could just imagine that long red hair and those green cat eyes of hers. I hope that she survived.

The news was worse than ever. Nations were dying or dead. How could things get much worse? I was out hunting rabbit when I saw something that reminded me of my own bunker. This bunker was strange, it was painted pink. Oh no, oh this could not be happening. This could not be Lisa Poopiepot's bunker. Not this close to mine, why so close. In actuality it was ten miles from mine. I had been hunting deer to give myself some protein. Suddenly, there she was Lisa Poopiepot. She opened the door of her bunker:

“Hey sweet cheeks, I guess you and I are the only ones left. I can't marry you but we

could live together and form an alliance.”

I ran for my very life. I did not wish to become an alliance with who only knew what!