Ashes to love

Lavender hated the cold. She especially hated the cold when there was snow on the ground, and today the snow would not relent. Despite this, she showed up to work on time. As she placed her food in the fridge her mind wondered back to the night before. Her girlfriend, Victoria, wanted a child. She had made a stew for dinner. And all Lavender could think about while Victoria was talking, was how chewy the mystery meat in the stew was. That was when Victoria lost her head. She stormed out of their shared house, letting in a particularly cold gush of air, before slamming the door. Lavender hadn’t seen her the entire night. She wished that she couldn’t sleep because of Victoria’s absence, but instead she had a good sleep. Victoria was six feet tall, and slept like it. Lavender was only 5 feet and was constantly pushing Victoria over so she could have room, or most often than not, would grab her pillow and sleep on the couch. Victoria always felt bad, but it was just the way she was.

She did start to wonder where Victoria slept, she didn’t have many close friends, which made Lavender feel bad for working so much. Yet Victoria always had friends to go out with or more so to get drunk with. Lavender couldn’t remember how many times she had returned home from a long shift in the early morning, to find Victoria drunk in the family room surround by people she didn’t know. This has caused multiple fights, which usually ended with Lavender shaking her head. Victoria never listened, and if Lavender finally felt like she was getting through to her, Victoria would cry. It was exhausting. But they had been together for four years, and perhaps they are going through a rough patch. Yet each day that past Lavender continues to wonder why they were together at all, and how they have lasted this long.

Lavender’s shifts were 24 hours long, so she would have at least another day before she had to speak to Victoria. She had never been more grateful for her job.

When she left her house, she checked the temperature of her home. It was set at 78, and she turned it up to 80. They both liked their home hot.

While at work she kept her mind busy, cleaning up the kitchen and ensuring all the tools were in the appropriate area in the garage. She even ventured out into the cold to retrieve gas. When the sirens started, she was relived. Quickly, she put on her bunker gear and was in the truck. As she peered out the window she let her mind think about Victoria, her long brown hair and her inability to cook. She started to wonder why they were together, what did they have in common?

When she felt the truck stop, she didn’t glance outside before putting on her mask and connecting to her air supply. As she jumped out of the truck she almost stopped dead in her tracks. Before her was her own home. How stupid she must have been to not realize where they were.

“No one’s home.” She said to her platoon mates. They still wanted to check the place out. As cold as it was the heat coming from the house in front of her warmed her.

As they entered the home Lavender wondered how this could have happened, she was always careful. Maybe Victoria had finally completely lost it and set the house on fire. Once she has an idea in her head there was no stopping her, something that Lavender use to find charming.

She knew when Victoria found out about the fire, she would cry. She was materialistic, and enjoyed having lots of stuff. Just last month they had a particularly bad fight which ended when Lavender had called her a hoarder. And now Victoria wanted children, but Lavender knew what that really meant. It meant that she herself would be having children. Victoria would get the for all the cute things, like teaching them to ride a bike or feeding them dinner and Lavender would be stuck changing the diapers and disciplining them. Everyone liked Victoria. Her carefree nature was always very popular at parties. But who would have to clean up the next day? Lavender. And that is how it will always be, Victoria making the mess and Lavender cleaning it up.

It felt fitting to be thinking this as she crawled through her burning house, a fire that Victoria either accidentally or on purpose started. And here was Lavender on her hands and knees saving the day.

As she crawled room to room, the heat mixed with the smoke making it difficult to see, she thought of why they started dating at all. She couldn’t remember the draw. She couldn’t even remember the last time they had agreed on what they wanted for dinner.

Her moods were the worst. When Victoria was fun to be around, she was at times so captaining. In those moments, Lavender would wonder why they weren’t married. But when she was in a bad mood, she remembered why. Victoria would scream at the top of her lungs like an infant. She would throw things and would start pulling at her own hair. Lavender‘s five year old nephew behaved better. Perhaps it was from all the years Lavender had spent as a firefighter, but she didn’t find it difficult to stay calm. This lead her mind back to her original question, what did they have in common?

Once she entered her bedroom, crawling on her hands and knees she knew something was wrong. There were clothes on the floor, something that Lavender could not stand, yet Victoria had no issues with.

Victoria was crouched down by already opened window, and look towards her expectantly.

“Ladder to side B of building, second floor.” Lavender spoke to her walkie talkie.

She crouched by Victoria and helped her stand up to hang out the window.

Once the ladder was up, and Victoria was helped to the ambulance, Lavender looked at her.

”God I hate the cold.” Victoria mumbled looking at their burning house. Lavender couldn’t help but agree.