The Chapters

Sometimes RJ thought she was in some kind of TV sitcom, minus the recorded audience laughter and the occasional applauses after a sassy comeback, or sighs and sad noises. But if this was just some kind of sitcom, then she was sure in a crazy one. What with 10 years of being sent off to one family, only to be sent back and thrown off to the next, well it sure as hell felt like peak comedy to RJ.

The kids would often tell her that it was just how the system worked, that not all kids get to bask in the love and idea of a family adopting them, and that most of them were really just in it for the extra cash, the other kids would simply instill in their minds that they were just simply broken, and no one wanted a broken kid, no matter how chubby their cheeks are.

RJ's not sure when she started believing all that, she had never voiced our her concerns on how they were being treated, it's just that eventually you'll get used to it and you just try to move forward from it and just hope for the best. Now, RJ's experience with her former foster families weren't exactly horrendous, but it wasn't exactly sweet paradise either, except for the first family that fostered her. They had been sweet, kind and caring to the then 5 year old RJ, who was shaking due to the confusion, but they calmed her down and gave her a cup of milk and some cookies, they bribed her upstairs and read her a book, and then next four months were heaven, and on the fifth month they said they'd adopt her, and that was when RJ first realized how painful it was to have someone lie to you like that, because not even a week after them telling her that, they sent her back because they were suddenly "expecting" a baby and they wanted to 100% focus on the newborn, their own flesh and blood. That was just the first of many.

It was also the first time RJ started collecting a piece of memorabilia from each family, and for the first family she kept the one crayon from the set they had given her, and she kept it hidden well in this cylindrical metal container that an older kid back at the shelter had given her to make it her keep safe.

It felt ridiculous at first, because RJ was honestly thinking about storing just some snacks or a few gums inside of it in case she gets sent to a family that would neglect her of some basic needs, yeah the older kids had warned her of the possibility of that. Yet she had unknowingly started something that she wasn't even sure of at first, so she called it "the chapters", only because the man from the first family gave her a little hidden fact that only the American Harry Potter books had the chapter stars on the bottom of every page. It was silly to name it that, come to think of it, especially when RJ found out it was called a "time capsule", but it had already sorta stuck with her and she didn't have the heart to change it.

And throughout the years she had collected various things from each family she had lived with. A small plastic rose from the second family that owned a flower shop and had made 6 year old RJ in charge of sorting out the different plastic flowers that people only bought either due to laziness or allergies. The third item placed inside was this weird telescope thing that when you looked inside, psychedelic shapes and colors would invade your vision, it was a kaleidoscope that the third family's oldest daughter had given her after finding out RJ didn't own any toys. It was probably the best gift RJ had ever received, and even though she had only really lasted a week with them because they had to move due to a promotion, RJ still thought it was the closest thing she got to the first family. She almost felt home.

But by the time RJ had turned 9, a Batman comic book, a blue handkerchief, a Hello Kitty keychain and a postcard from Colorado had made it into the chapters. The comic being something that the fourth family always had lying around, one they never really read anymore, and so she was allowed to keep it. The blue handkerchief was when she had accidentally cut herself from chopping some onions, her foster mother had yelled at her all night for being so clumsy, but had given her a blue hanky to stop the bleeding since she didn't want to waste any more water on a "useless foster child" like her. The Hello Kitty keychain was a souvenir that her sixth foster father had given her since he had used the foster money on his family to go on a trip to Houston leaving RJ alone in the house with limited amount of food, to make it up, he bought her a keychain. The postcard wasn't exactly given to her, it was lodged in the edges of her then closet, it was old and crumpled but RJ just burst into a wide smile seeing a different place on a card that said "Wish You Were Here", so with sneaky hands, RJ shoved it inside the chapters.

RJ wasn't exactly sure when she was going to close the chapters and bury it so her future self could go and dig it up and reminisce over the things she had kept. At her 8th foster home, RJ was contemplating on it, wondering it was finally time to close it permanently since it was almost full, and anything bigger put in it would not allow it to close, and she was almost 18, and not many families wanted to adopt emo teenagers. And she was 16 already, she had planned on burying it earlier than that but she could never bring herself to, but now at 16, with only 2 more years before she's done with all this fostering, and she'll be done with all the families just using her for money, and hurting her in ways that they won't even care, 2 more years until she's free, now RJ just wants it to be done and over with. She wanted to pick up a small memorabilia as a final item in the chapters, and maybe bury it in that old oak tree in the backyard of the shelter.

But nothing could have prepared her for the 8th family.

She had it all memorized. From the ride in the car with her social worker up until the basic introductions she'd have to go through with her new foster parents that would not give a shit or two about her. So it was cool, she knew what to do and how to handle it, but when she arrived at a small neighborhood at Long Beach, CA, stopping at a small house with beige chipping paint and an over excited Labrador by the picket fence, RJ did not expect what was about to hit her.

That was apparently the start to RJ's new beginning, because this couple was young, around only 29, and both were women, and RJ had asked the stupidest question ever..."are guys like...gal pals?". Both women laughed hysterically and the slightly shorter woman, Cara, said "oh we're really great gal pals". It was then that RJ knew she was in the right place. She was somehow...home.

-

Time had passed since RJ had been adopted by the Park's, both Cara and Wendy asking her permission for the adoption of course, and RJ had been having the time of her life, though it was difficult, especially the first few months, since all had been going so well that RJ was so sure something bad was bound to happen, she learned not to get her hopes up, trying her best to keep to herself, saving some packs of biscuits under her bed out of habit, not making that much friends at the new school she was enrolled at, but it was hard to do all that when her foster parents were probably the definition of angelic, they spoiled her with food and clothing that she almost always refused, they also liked to hang out with her, asking her some things that she was up to answering, and if she was uncomfortable then they would not push her at all, then the kids at school were far different from her last high school, these kids actually found her Star Wars shirt so cool and immediately she had three close friends who she would geek out with, and soon enough...RJ had let her fingers slip out of this safe haven she always had with her, her only safe haven back then; the chapters. Because now she found a new safe haven, a new chance, a new life, and it seemed like she was in it for the long run, and for the first time in a long time, RJ finally relaxed and believed in this little fantasy she never thought would come to life.

The chapters, she had realized, had been some kind of odd keep safe for her, a capsule filled with pain and tears, everything in there was a reminder of how broken and how unworthy she was of love and of a family, all the things, whether good or broken, in there were memories of how she felt, and she felt like she had bottled up all those feelings in each item. Probably like how Lord Voldemort had split his soul into seven, storing them in certain items, forming each into a horcrux. The only difference was that RJ did not wish to be immortal, she did it for the hope of being able to store away those feelings, or for her to look back on these feelings of agony and misery, but now she doesn't exactly know what to do with it. She had gone past all those feelings, because all she had now were good ones, beautiful memories of her and her foster moms squeezing in together in that cramped up photo booth at the mall, her and her friends, Chanel and Josie having weekly movie marathons at each other's house, her and the good days that now outweighed the bad, and her and her newfound love of writing and new found...lover, Lia who always looked at her like she was some kind of masterpiece. All RJ had now were good feelings, and she's not sure what to do with the bad ones.

"Hey, what's this?" Lia asked as she brought up a dusty old cylindrical metal container, a confused expression plastered on her face as she showed it to her girlfriend who was going through the photo album her moms had given her for Christmas last night.

"What's what?" RJ asked without looking up, smiling down on a photo of her, Chanel, Josie and Lia during their moving day at their shared loft. 

"Can I open this, love?" Lia asked

It wasn't Lia's first time in her room, they've been friends since high school and got together after graduation, and now they were in college, visiting their hometown during the holiday breaks. They've been going strong, and have always understood each other well, and their families loved the other so much.

It was Christmas Day today, and Lia came over because they wanted to run a marathon of cheesy Christmas movies together, but then the remote to RJ's TV ran out of batteries which led RJ's Mum to run to the nearby store to get one. So Lia ended up rummaging through some of RJ's old stuff while the latter couldn't stop admiring the photo album.

"Love?" Lia called out again

RJ put aside the album and looked up at Lia who was examining the container in her hands, an adorable expression written across her face.

"The chapters" RJ mumbled as she recognized it

"The what?" Lia asked

"The chapters. A...time capsule that I used to hang on to back in the days" RJ explained

"Love, you're supposed to bury the time capsule and wait for someone in the future or you yourself, to find it" Lia grinned at her

"I never put the last item in" RJ shrugged

She had totally forgotten about it by now, due to the many beautiful moments she now has of life, the living memories of pain within that metal container felt so peculiar. Now at 20 years old, RJ had completely detached herself from it. She was now a different RJ, a happier and healthier RJ that was now a University student majoring in Writing at a hot shot Ivy League college along with her friends and girlfriend, and she now has the most supportive and loving parents that a kid could ever wish for.

"I used to collect one random thing from each family I was fostered by, and I put them in there. It was given to me by some older kid back in the shelter, and I guess I had turned it into some kind of time capsule" RJ sat beside her girlfriend and ran a finger against the chapters, it felt cold and slightly unforgiving.

"But what was the last item you hadn't put in here yet?" Lia asked

"Well...nothing. Because I only ever put things there that reminded me of a painful memory from each family that eventually let me go. And well...here, I haven't found a single reason for me to put one in there. This is the happiest I've ever been, and I found my forever home" RJ smiled

"So why 'the chapters'?" Lia intertwined her hand with RJ's

"Randomly thought of those chapter stars on the Harry Potter books. My first foster father used to read it to me when I was with them" RJ rested her head against Lia's shoulder

"What do you plan with this then?" Lia asked

"I don't actually know" RJ whispered

"Do you wanna open it up and look?" But RJ shook her head

"Okay...how about you just bury it? Whether you wanna dig it up in a few years or not, it's up to you. Then maybe we can start a new time capsule" Lia suggested

RJ looked up "A new one?" 

"Yeah. We'll fill it up with important and random things that remind us of happy memories and moments! Me, you, Chan and Jo!" Lia beamed at the shorter girl

RJ smiled and leaned forward to capture Lia's lips. It was slow and soft and beautiful as always, and when she felt her girlfriend smile against her lips, she immediately smiled as well. She pulled back to find the taller one with a sheepish smile on her face.

"So what do you suggest we first put in our new time capsule then, love?" RJ asked

"This moment right here...write about it, and when I get home later, I'll try to find this old wooden box I used to have before. We can start there...and we'll go on for as long as we want, and we don't have to bury it" Lia said

"I thought you said time capsules were supposed to be buried for us or some future person to find?" RJ smirked at her girlfriend, who let out a chuckle, rubbing her nose against hers

"Well you'll be burying old painful feelings with the chapters, so I want this new one to be here with us all the way, because you don't exactly bury happiness, right? You keep them with you." Lia smiled lovingly at her

RJ wanted to cry right then, because now she wasn't in some kind of TV sitcom or sad documentary, now she felt like the greatest writer on Earth, writing down the words to some brilliant novel that she was bound to keep for the rest of her life. And nothing could have prepared her for the beautiful life she had ahead of her.