Bibbity Bobbity Boo

Entry on 9^th April

Dear Diary

Hi!

Am I supposed to say hi to a diary? Maybe I am, I don’t know.

I knew…I just knew starting this was a silly idea.

But that idiot Sean, he gifted this dratted thing to me! Something about it being a good vent for my pent-up feelings and inner emotions.

Inner emotions, my butt! He knows very well that writing a journal isn’t what I do.

After all, what the heck should I even write?

“I woke up in the morning, I brushed my teeth, I ate three biscuits, I took bath…”

What can I even write at this time, anyway? I’m sitting around, basically doing nothing. There’s nothing to write!

I told him all this, but did he listen? No! My idiot best friend went and bought this dang thing for me anyway.

And he knows I wouldn’t refuse to use a gift from him. It would make me a hypocrite after all the times I nagged him about leaving my gifts unused.

The idiot-box.

What am I, Ginny Weasley?

It would be fun, though, wouldn’t it? If the diary answered me?

Other than the evil wizard part, of course.

Maybe my diary could be like a fairy godmother or something. Someone who can just wave their hands, say Bibbity Bobbity Boo and all my troubles would be gone!

Did someone call for me?

Oh my goodness. What the frikkity frack?

What’s frikkity frack? And how did you know the spell?

What’s the matter? Whoever you are, weren’t you writing?

I’m sorry, I fainted! Who the frick are you?

Fainted? Why in the world did you faint?

Because diaries don’t sprout words!

But why are you shocked? You’re the one who wrote the spell!

What do you mean? What spell?

Bibbity bobbity boo, of course. It’s the universal spell that calls us!

Hahaha, it looks like my life has become a joke. That ridiculous Cinderella spell thingy is a spell?

Ridiculous? Of course not. It’s one of the strongest invocation spells around!

Okay, I’m officially in La La Land. But I’ll bite. If I’m dreaming, this is the most interesting dream I’ve had in a while. Who are you?

I’m a fairy, of course! A diary fairy. We’re almost never called to talk to the Writers. Bumble Jellystorm, that’s my name. What’s your name, dear?

I’m Nikhil Patel. And I’m totally confused. Interested, but confused. What is it that you guys do?

You mean you don’t know? How can you not know?

No offence, Bumble lady, but I’ve never heard of you guys! I’ve heard of fairy godmothers and the tooth fairy, but never anything about a diary!

Fairy godmothers are a myth, dear. But tooth fairies are not. Drat them. Always going around stealing everyone’s thunder. But still, how can you be so ignorant? What do they teach you guys in school these days?

What do you mean, ignorant? Magical creatures don’t exist. Tooth fairies are just children’s stories, to make little kids feel better about losing their teeth.

Really, child? You’re that ignorant of how the world works? Next you’ll be saying the sun is a ball of fire or something, not The Phoenix flying in the sky every morning.

Okay, you’ve lost me. The sun is a ball of fire.

Honestly, child. Whichever world do you live in?

Of, forget it. And anyway, I’m texting a diary. Who am I to say you’re wrong? But what do you people do?

We’re the guardians, of course. We guard the emotions that come through these pages; keep them out of harm’s way. Why do you think people feel better after writing in a diary?

Well, actually…um…I never believed that :). I always thought it was a marketing gimmick, you know. A way to sell an otherwise useless item.

Now you’re just being offensive. Diaries, useless? What a ridiculous concept.

You’ve still not told me what exactly it is that you do.

Well, for someone ignorant as you, it might get a little difficult to explain. It would honestly be better to show you. So let me as you some questions. First, why exactly did your friend Sean give you the diary?

How did you- Oh. Obviously. I wrote it, didn’t I? Huh. Well, I’m usually a pretty chill guy, you know. The kind who’s always ready to hang out, who never says no to any plan. But a few weeks back, I was rejected, and now I’m this mess who doesn’t even want to get out of bed.

So it’s about a girl, is it? I should have guessed.

No, no! Not at all! I got a rejection from my dream University. Yale. Heard of it?

Well, no, actually. It’s been a long while since someone used a diary I guard. Besides, we’ve not been called by any Writer since the Magical Ages!

Magical Ages? Huh. Never mind. Do you at least know what a University is?

There you go again, being insulting. I mean, I’m old, but I’m not that old. Anyway, you said you’d been rejected by your dream University?

Yeah. I mean, I know I have other options. There’s other Uni’s too, of course. And not all of them have sent out their admits yet. But I really wanted to get into Yale!

So that makes you sad.

Of course it makes me sad! I’ve not left my room for the past week, for goodness sake!

Ah. I understand. Anything else you want to tell me?

You know, now that I think about it, I was planning to take up a few courses in my free time. But then I got that damned rejection letter, and my mind just shut off, you know.

Wait. What’s that weird light?

Never mind that. How are you feeling?

Huh. You know what, I’m feeling a bit better, all of a sudden.

See? I told you it would be better to show you what I do!

But you didn’t do anything!

Ah. Are you dense, boy? The light, child. The light! Didn't you see it?

I thought it was some reflection or something! How was I supposed to know what it is? I still don’t know what it is.

Magic, of course. My magic. We usually do it when the diary is closed. You try talking to people who have diaries. They never feel better as they write, only after they close their diaries. But you needed a demonstration. How did I get stuck with such a non-believer? Diaries don’t make people feel better, indeed.

Fine, lady. You’ve convinced me. I’ll start writing now.

It was nice talking to you, even if you are so clueless. Remember, if you want to call me, Bibbity Bobbity Boo. Tooodles!

Wow. That was weird. It was a good weird, though.

Anyway, bye, diary! I now know what to write! Bibbity bobbity…well, I won’t write it again now.

Entry on 10/4

Oh my goodness. Where are all that lady’s entries? Did I imagine the whole thing?

Stupid thing…looks like a frigging one-sided phone call or something.

Oh, well. I have to know if I imagined it.

Bibbity Bobbity Boo.

Hi, dear. You want to talk again already?