Okies

“What kind of wife doesn’t tell her husband she’s a bullfrog?” Millie asked Fey, her soon-to-be sister-in-law, who was, in fact, a massive, green, wart-covered frog. 

“You’re not supposed to be here,” Fey said hushedly, bulging eyes squinted.

“Your wedding is in a week, right? Ezra is my brother, for Christ’s sake! I don’t know what game you’re playing, but you can’t seclude him from his family. Everyone in Tulsa is wondering where he is.”

“Okay,” Fey said, sighing and leaning on the front door. Suddenly, her demeanor changed, becoming pleading. “I'm a witch, but not a bad person! I come from a pond around here. It’s a tough life, hunting for lightning bugs and other critters, never knowing if a gator might sneak up on ya’. Then, I met your brother. He showed me I’m more than an amphibian—I’m a person, too.”

Millie burst out laughing. “Because you cast a spell on him! I talked to Ezra on the phone. It took weeks to get ahold of him. He doesn’t know you’re a frog. That poor boy thinks he’s engaged to Kim Kardashian with the way he described you.”

“Or maybe he just accepts me,” Fay said defiantly, glaring. “Maybe it’s deeper than appearance.”

Millie tipped her ballcap, grinning and looking around at the Oklahoma country. They were in the middle of nowhere, where twisters arose and spun themselves out without any folk having a clue. It was just brown, cracked dirt, tall grass, and sparse clumps of trees for miles. Worms sizzled in the summer heat, rain a distant memory.

“If you’re so confident in this little arrangement,” Millie said coyly, “how about I stay for dinner and see what Ezra thinks about it? Everyone’s dying to know how this unlikely couple came to be.” 

“No-no, you can’t.”

“Why not?”

Fey stamped her slimy, webbed foot in the dust. “Fine! Yes, I cast a spell on Ezra. But he’s happy with me, so who cares?”

“He’s living a lie.”

“To you, not him! Please, Millie, let us be. You must’ve seen how broken Ezra was after his last girlfriend. He had no self-confidence. Look at how much better he’s doing now!”

“I don’t give a damn. You’re a fucking liar and a manipulator, and I’m letting Ezra know.”

“Well, here’s one more thing: if anyone tells Ezra what’s going on, it breaks the spell, and he dies.”

“You evil toad bitch!”

Fey shrugged. “Oh, well. So, you can stay for dinner, but you better not spill.”

Millie looked down, swallowing, her face troubled. “All right. When does he get back?”

“Ezra’s out herding right now. Probably a couple of hours. Right before sunfall.”

“May I come in and wait?”

“No,” Fey snorted dismissively.

Millie nodded, returning to her truck and staring Fey down through the windshield. Fey smiled and waved, shutting the door.

***

Dusk arrived with dimming daylight, cooler air, and kisses of scarlet and goldenrod on the horizon. Ezra followed on horseback, a cloud of dust clear in the air behind him as he neared the house. He was a handsome blondie with blue eyes, scruff clinging to his sharp jawline, and a torn, aged denim jacket. It was hard to believe such a beautiful person had suffered so much.

“What’re you doing here, Millie?” he asked with his deep Okie twang.

Millie got out and hugged him, a green tote bag over her arm. “I don’t know. I just really wanted to see you.”

“Sorry if I’ve been distant, Sis. I’ve been so busy starting the ranch and taking care of Fey. Have you two met?”

Millie pursed her lips. “Briefly. I didn’t want to see the house without you, so I waited.”

“Aw, you didn’t need to do that. Come on inside. Dinner should be ready soon.”

They sat in the dim, humid house around an oak stump table, lit by a hanging mushroom light, waiting for Fey to bring in food. The tote bag sat beside Millie’s foot. Her fingers drummed nervously on the table.

“So, you weren’t waiting too long for me, right?” Ezra asked.

“Nothing I couldn’t handle. I ran some errands to kill some time.”

“Two more minutes, guys!” Fey yelled from the kitchen.

Millie reached over, tousling Ezra’s hair. “How have you been?” 

“He’s great!” Fey said.

“I mean, yeah, I guess I’m good.”

Millie glared at Fey and turned back to Ezra. “Did you know that Uncle Jack had another kid?”

“What? Really?”

“Naw, I just wanted to ask something Fey didn’t know, considering she isn’t family.”

“Hey, not nice, Millie-”

“Relax, Bubba. All I want to know is one thing.”

“What?”

“Where did you and that lovely girl in there meet? It must’ve been someplace special!”

Millie practically yelled the last sentence for Fey to hear. She nervously eyed them over the counter, her rectangular pupils dilated. 

Ezra furrowed his brows. “Well, I can’t quite remember, now that you say. I was trout fishing in a pond over there, I recall. Hmm. I think-”

“Dinner’s ready!” Fey interrupted, swooping in. “Shepherd’s pie!”

“Oh,” Millie said, looking confusedly at the steaming casserole.

“What? Is something wrong?” Fey asked, crossing her arms.

“I’m just not the biggest fan of Sheperd’s pie.”

“Huh? You told me that’s what you wanted earlier! I asked while you waited!”

Millie shrugged, looking up at her. “I guess you were mistaken.”

“What? That’s not possible. No, no, no…”

“Jesus, it’s fine, Fey,” Ezra said, kissing her. “Millie was always picky.”

“Yeah,” Millie said, reaching down and setting the tote bag on the table. “Besides, I brought something myself anyway.”

“Where’d you get that?”

“I told you I ran some errands. I made a quick stop at the store. Well, it wasn’t quick. It took probably forty minutes.”

Ezra watched curiously and Fey apprehensively as Millie opened the bag. She pulled out a small, rectangular, opaque Tupperware container. A strange odor came out when she cracked it open.

“Dammit, hurry up, Sis! I wanna see!” Ezra said, leaning forward.

Millie slowly took the top off to reveal the contents, wrapped in paper towels. She peeled them off carefully. Inside was something tan brown and unrecognizable.

“What the hell is that?” Ezra asked.

“Let me see,” Fey said, pushing past him. She let out a shriek that made Ezra jump.

“Shit! Jesus! What’s wrong, Honey?”

“It’s, it’s-” Fey stuttered, hyperventilating and pointing to the Tupperware, eyes widened, unable to speak.

“What?” Ezra reached in, pulling out what looked like a chicken tender, taking a sizeable, juicy bite. “Mmm. Whatever it is, it’s delicious.” 

“Right?” Millie agreed, taking one.

Ezra continued munching. “You scared me, Fey,” he chuckled. “I thought it was something awful!” 

Gasping and stepping back, Fey’s eyes fluttered. She looked ready to pass out. 

“I know,” Millie said. She looked up at Fey. “I just knew I had to get some of these when I saw them at the store. Frog legs were always your favorite growing up!”

Suddenly, Fey let loose a blood-curdling scream, hopping over the table and through the door, dishes crashing.

“What’s going on?” Ezra yelled, chasing after her. 

It was pitch-black outside, except for the scattered lightning bugs flickering with the breeze. Millie and Ezra watched as Fey jumped away faster than they could run. She took to the air, did a twirl, and disappeared with a soft splash in a creek in the distance.

“Why did you do that?” Ezra turned and asked, tears on his cheeks. It looked like he was waking from a dream. The spell must’ve broken.

Millie pulled Ezra in for a hug, the frog leg still in her hand. “I love you, Brother, but sometimes, you don’t know what the hell you’re talking about.”