Secrets Unkept

"Can you keep a secret?" a familiar voice said. It belonged to my friend Ella Ross.

My hand stopped midway to my mouth. What can I say? I had a crush on cookies. And I had a tendency to steal them. Hence the reason I found myself in this situation, listening to what I shouldn’t have.  

Holding my breath, I waited for Ella to continue. What else could I do?

I really have to stop stealing the cookies, I thought. 

"You know I do," my other friend Michaela James said. I pictured her rolling her eyes. We knew how tight to her chest she kept things. When you told her a secret, she kept it. 

"Well, hmm... you see…" Ella said. I imagined her shifting her body weight from one foot to the other. I waited. The suspense killing me. "Jason kissed me," she said in a rush. 

Just in time, I covered my mouth to keep inside my gasp. My boyfriend kissed her? What the heck? 

"He what?" Michaela said, her voice cold.

Ella sighed. "I know. It's terrible. I can't even look Willow in the eyes. She's my friend! I don't even know what happened. One minute he's telling me they had a fight over something stupid, and the next, he's kissing me!"

"Did you kiss him back?" Michaela asked the question I wanted to.

I glued my ear to the pantry’s door as my heart beat faster. Loud enough for them to hear it. Okay. Maybe not that loud, but you get my point.

I shook my head. I couldn't believe Jason did something like that. But I had to face the truth. Our relationship didn't work anymore. 

"No!" Ella said.

I let out a breath. 

"You have to tell Willow. I mean, if it were my boyfriend, I'd want to know," Michaela said. As always, she went straight to the point. 

"But-"

"Wait! You don't like him, right?" Michaela said, alarm in her voice. The same alarm that appeared in my heart. Did Ella like Jason? What would I do if she said yes?

I waited. 

"Ella?" 

She did. My shoulders fell. 

"I liked him first, you know.” Ella sounded defeated.

Oh.

“Then he asked her out, so I said nothing. It was better that way." I hated the sadness in her voice. 

Gosh, was I a terrible friend. Because now that I thought about it, I saw her flirt with Jason once. Before we started our relationship.

And I chose to ignore it. Now, I had to face the truth. Jason was no longer mine. 

"What about him? Does he feel the same?"

"I think so. But that's not the point, Mic. I can't believe I let him kiss me. It's wrong, Willow is my friend. I feel terrible," Ella said, guilt and shame lacing her words.

What did I do? Did I come out?

"I still think you should tell her."

A door opened. "What's taking you guys so long?" it was Georgina Wells’ bubbly voice. "Gosh. One would think you had to run to the store to get the sodas." 

"Sorry. We caught up gossiping," Ella said.

What a terrible lie.

I pictured Georgina frowning. "Mic? Gossiping?" she burst out laughing. “Don’t tell me whatever it is you’re talking about if you don’t want to.” 

A smile pulled at my lips despite the conversation I listened to. No doubt Michaela rolled her eyes at Georgina. "You make me sound so boring."

"You know I'm kidding." Something fell to the floor. I guessed Georgina dropped a can of soda. “Whatever. Don’t tell me if you don’t want to. I’ll know eventually.” 

In the distance, I heard voices and a door closing. But my mind went somewhere else. I slid down the wall and hugged my knees. My boyfriend kissed my friend. I had to talk to Ella.

Because I refused to lose a friend over a guy. 

After shedding a few tears and feeling sorry for myself, I got up from the floor and left the pantry.

My four friends were in the pool or tanning in the lounges spread around the pool. Music came from the speakers. A song repeated every few songs. A smile tugged at my lips. That was Georgina’s doing.

I looked for Ella and found her next to Abigail Thomas. They seemed to be in the middle of a debate. No surprise there. I decided to leave them alone. 

Before I knew it, my eyes landed on Michaela.

One look at me, and I knew she knew I heard her talking to Ella. Her mouth formed an O. I gave her a weak smile. Because even with what happened in the kitchen, I didn’t regret throwing this party. 

Just the five of us before the summer ended.

Then my phone vibrated on the table where I left it. Checking the screen, I saw it was Jason. He wanted us to meet. I knew without him saying it that he was going to break up with me. Even though I didn't want us to.

Truth is, I had trouble with change.

And breaking up with Jason Harris meant to change. It meant he would no longer be there to talk to me in the middle of the night because I couldn't sleep. Or drive me to school. 

Losing him meant creating a new routine when I was happy with the one I had. But life had to go on, right? Change and death never go away. That was what my grandmother used to say. 

With a sigh, I left my phone on the table. I laid on the lounge and closed my eyes. I loved feeling the sun on me. For a moment, I just wanted to forget. Jason and Ella. How did I not see it?

After a while, I felt someone sit down in the lounge. 

Ella. It had to be.

I opened my eyes. Our gazes locked. "You heard us." 

"Yes," I said. 

Our friends eyed us funny. Because they didn't know if something was going on between us. Only Michaela knew, by the looks of things. Though it wouldn't last much.

In the end, we all shared our secrets. 

"I'm sorry, Willow. I don't even know what happened."

I hugged my knees and looked at her. "Why didn't you tell me you liked him? I never would've gone after him if I'd known." I failed at hiding the hurt from my voice. 

A smile pulled at her lips. "Because you looked so happy when he asked you out. How could I ruin your happiness? Friendship doesn't work like that."

This girl.

Someone jumped in the pool, splashing us with water. "Georgina!" Ella said. Someone else giggled. I guessed it was Abigail.

"I'm sorry!" Georgina said. We all knew she wasn’t sorry. 

Grabbing two towels, I handed one to Ella. "Thank you, Wil."

Georgina could be clueless sometimes. Good thing she had us to look out for her. Now an uncomfortable silence stretched. My mind went in different directions, but there was only one important.

"I'm going to break up with Jason."

"What? Because of me? I can't believe I did this." Tears appeared in her eyes. I took her hand. "No, Ella. It's not because of you. My relationship with Jason just doesn't work anymore. He and I know it."

Ella shook her head. "When did our lives become so complicated?" 

I gave her a sheepish smile. "I think they call it growing up."

"Well, it kind of sucks." We laughed at that. 

"You should ask him out," I said after a moment. I meant it.

Ella threw her towel at me. I dodged it with no trouble. "Shut up!" 

We stood up. I fought a smile. "We're good then?"

I thought about it for a second. "Yes." 

We joined our friends in the pool after that. Later, I would talk to Jason. Then he and Ella would decide what to do. As for me, I was going to be fine. Maybe this change would be great.