The Search

When I awoke from what felt like an endless slumber, I felt light and fuzzy. I felt a tingle at the tips of my fingers and toes, the only heaviness that I felt was beneath my hips as they pressed firmly into the solid wet ground. I inhaled fresh crisp air and came to understand I was no longer in my world. I had no idea where I was or had I come here. I began to hesitantly open my heavy eyes, my heart pounding as my body felt more awareness. Aware that what I saw before me, was somewhere I'd never seen. The world around me was vast and empty. Full of colors and lights that felt more vibrant and beautiful than the world I had come from. Though I saw no signs of my people, I saw signs of life. Sounds of the wind blowing and the look of green trees, the sign of life we had been waiting for.

I had come from a dying world in search of another, for the hope of our people. What a world to find, but we found it in the most terrible way. I began to remember the screams as we came crashing down, the loud crash and the silence that brought me to where I laid now. The silence in this world gave me a chill as I remembered all of those who had fallen to this world with me. I sat up slowly, more sore now with the memories and fear of what I may find. What was before me was a purple sky but so much purple that I wondered if it could even be called sky, the ground was a red clay that had caked itself to what remained of my clothes. It was not cold in this world, but not hot, just a comfortable breeze blowing through the tall reeds of grass.

I stood finding my feet beneath me, trying to scan to see anyone who had fallen with me. I was alone in this field, perhaps maybe the only one who had survived the crash. I began to walk slowly and quietly, who knew what or who inhabited this unknown world. I felt a sudden rush of determination to find someone, someone to help me find a way to survive this place. I saw what seemed to be smoke in the distance behind a tree that looked  askew in the distance. Making my way toward it I began to hear the moans of man. 

I walked towards them faster and faster until I was running, until I felt my lungs on fire with air that was fresh and new.  I at last, saw who was making the sounds of pain, and stopped in my tracks. Beckett, whose leg was twisted into a shape that made my stomach drop. His face was deathly pale and his eyes met mine. We did not know each other well, but I knew his face. He was in charge of the Guard, he was one of the most powerful men on the ship. Here he was before me bent into a broken mess. I was a nobody, a volunteer who offered my services to the cause of saving our people. Those who volunteered to serve those who were sent by our government to save our kind. I served them food and made their beds, silently there but never making eye contact. I was there for one reason, and one reason only to save my family. The volunteers, their families were taken care of, fed and housed, given medical attention that no one else could get access to anymore. My mother was dying, black lung filled with the pollution of our home. I sank to my knees in front of Beckett, terrified to touch him. I knew a little about how to tend to small wounds, all of us who agreed to come on this mission were trained. This was way out of my training, I would call for a med but I was afraid of what else may have been attracted to the smoke.

Beckett looked at me as though he was trying to place who I was, I looked at him seeing his eyes dilated to where his blue eyes seemed nearly black. He said "I'm a lost cause, go find someone else to help." I looked at his defeated face and said "I don't see anyone else in need of help, and I need you just as much as you're gonna need me."

His face seemed to slack with relief, "you're a med then?" I shook my head and said "no, but they trained all of us on how to handle wounds." He cut out a short pained laugh "nothing like this, I'm as good as dead."  "That coming from our fearless Guard leader, who knew they sent out our bravest men and sent you." He inhaled a sharp breath as I began to search in the bag beside him to find any evidence of medical supplies. Finding a kit filled with alcohol and a brace and wrap I felt my heart quicken with relief. “I think I can make this work, I just need to take a look at how bad it is.” As I reached for his leg he tried to pull back as though I could cause any more harm to what had already occurred to his left leg. “Please let me help you, I won’t cause you pain if I find it to be unnecessary.” I began to slowly look over his wounded leg, and found that it was nowhere near as bad as I thought it would be. It seemed that his knee had been pushed out of socket and that was why there was no blood and no evidence of a broken leg. He would just have to trust me to put it into place and wrap it with the brace. “ I need you to trust me” I started “I can help you, but I need you to allow me to.” He nodded. “I trust you.” Even though I knew that he didn't, he still eyed me as though I was an alien from this new world. “Take a deep breath and close your eyes,” I didn’t want to see the look when I popped it into place, slowly he did as I asked. I grabbed his leg and swiftly and carefully did as I had done for my brother so many years ago when he had fallen from a tree and knocked his knee out of place. I clicked it in and with a cry he yelped and then suddenly breathed a sigh of great relief. As I began to wrap his leg I said “it’s still gonna hurt a lot but it’ll heal in a few days just go easy on it.” 

“Thanks” he said, and despite having seen him command a whole room of people with just one word, having them silence a room. I realized he wasn’t much older than me. Maybe a few years, around 24. They only allowed 21 to 30 on this mission, but I thought the commander of our guard would be older. “Don’t mention it, I’m Cassandra.” “Beckett, so Cassandra.” He said almost so calmly that it caught me off guard. “What brings you here?” I couldn’t help but stare at him coldly, he found this whole thing funny but I didn’t. I’d almost died based on whatever foolish plan these so called leaders made. I said coolly with ice in my eyes, “ I don’t know commander what plan brings us here?” At that his smile dropped. “You know who I am then… well I understand why you may blame me for what happened, but I assure you there are things you don’t understand unless you were our captain flying the ship.” There was the commander I had been waiting for, the man who was full of steel and his words so sharp that they could cut you down where you stand. I looked at him, I wasn’t afraid of him. Here in this world he wasn’t in charge of anyone, especially not me. This world was a new world that wouldn’t be ruled by the rules of our dying one. “Yes well what a plan that was, I don’t see many others who’d survived it.” He looked at me coldly, and said “yes well just because we haven’t found anyone else doesn’t mean they aren’t here somewhere.” I asked, “well commando can you stand?” He seemed taken aback by my sarcasm, “I think I can manage.” As he stood as did I and we made our way through the field looking for other survivors. I didn’t mean to be so cold towards Beckett, It’s just men like him had run our world into the ground. If I was being honest with myself, that was another reason I came on this mission. To hopefully be a part of finding a new world and possibly being a part of making the laws and the way things are done better so we didn’t have another dying world on our hands. I’d seen enough to know that our “leaders” on our ship didn’t have the same mentality as I and some of the other volunteers did. 

Our world had warned us for hundreds of years that we needed to change our ways and yet we never listened and those that did were outcast and called crazy. Then as the truth became clear and more and more death and suffering occurred. Our leaders found a “solution” : abandon our world and start fresh on another. I told myself on the day that I volunteered that I would do anything to be on that ship to be a part of this world. 

Our world was dying and it was killing our people along with it, everyone I loved had been touched by the disease, pollution, and death that had become our normal. The first thing I noticed about this world was the feeling of fresh air in my lungs and the clear sky that seemed so foreign to me. I would protect that with my life. No matter who they sent on these ships. As we made our way I saw a dip in the trees and there was our ship, it had already made its mark on this new world. Surrounding the ship were the bodies of the dead and the wounded, hundreds of people crying out in pain. Yes we had truly brought our way of life to this beautiful nameless world.