OPEN SESAME!

I was home when I received a message from my wife saying “I’m at Devil’s cave.” I was puzzled and worried as I didn’t know the place and why she was there. However she had given me directions and I found the place. It was indeed a cave and saw I was free to enter. I went in and in a moment found myself in a strange world. It was a world as there were many different people in different apparels moving about. As I stood rooted watching, a young woman who was in topless wear came to me and said with a smile “Welcome stranger! My name is Lima and I’m from planet tellus. I’ll be your guide to this world.” Her form was immaculate, her face was beautiful and I was greatly attracted to her. I said “Hello Lima! Nice meeting you. You’re beautiful.” I paused and said “I feel thirsty. May I have a glass of water?”

“Sure.” She got me a carafe and I drank.

The water was sweet and as I drank it she said “This water is from the magic spring of tellus. It will instantly make you at least ten years younger.” I was surprised. I was 30 and had become 20 again!

I said “Lima I’ve come in search of my wife.”

“Don’t worry. We’ll find her. Explore Devil’s cave with me.”

“I will. But promise me one thing as one good thing deserves another: A night’s fling with you. I don’t speak so openly but this atmosphere and my age discount encouraged me.”

She laughed and said “Sure. First let us explore this world.”

We sighted a gate and going through it she said “We’ve entered Queersland.”

I saw many male couples and many female couples as well. We were near a house and saw a female couple seated talking. Lima asked me “Do you feel like listening to what they are talking?”

“You mean we eavesdrop?” She nodded.

I could hear what was spoken very clearly. One woman said “Though I love you so much……”

The other said “I know what you wish as you’ve told me: Hold the red headed cornucopia in the palm of the hand. Alas! We don’t have one.”

“God has been partial. He has fixed it on the male. He could very well have given us what we lack and fixed the gash near the navel.”

“True.” She sighed and added “I also wish I could hold one in my palm and shoot.”

Lima was laughing as she said “Typical female longings! Want to hear more?”

“No. Let us proceed.”

Lima said “Now we will be going back in time.”

As we went ahead I saw the board Camelot. I asked “Lima have we come to King Arthur’s land?”

“Yes. That woman on the throne is Queen Guinevere.”

“I suppose the man she is with is King Arthur.”

Lima laughed and said “In Devil’s cave you can’t assume things. The man she is with is knight Lancelot. To put it figuratively she found Lancelot’s sword huge, heavy and thick. It was larger and broader than Arthur’s own Excalibur. Here she is continuing her affair with knight Lancelot. Let her enjoy!”

“Did she really cheat on the king?”

Lima laughed and said “Of course. Arthur chose Guinevere but she chose to ignore Excalibur.”

I asked “How do you know so much? You’re from planet tellus, and not from earth.”

“I’ve been trained under royal magician Merlin. This region belongs to him.”

“Devil’s cave is so tempting. With my age having  shrunk  I feel like groping Guinevere. She looks voluptuous.”

“You can. At the moment she is alone. Go ahead. I’ll wait.”

As I went near Guinevere I felt a whip lash strike me. I saw Lancelot with his huge heavy and thick sword and withdrew. How did I get whipped when there was no whiplash around?  It was strange.

Lima said “Lancelot scared you! He is jealous about Guinevere.”

I said “Let us proceed.”

We went a short distance and crossed a bridge over a moat. There we stepped into a house which stood in our way. It was spacious and as we were en route I saw a nude woman having a bath with water flowing from the roof. She was being helped by a young girl.

Seeing my puzzled look Lima said “I was sure you would recognize Danae.”

I shook my head when Lima said “Because of the prophecy that her child would kill him her dad shut her up in a tower where no male could climb into. But God Zeus impregnated her coming as a shower of gold through the ceiling. And she bears a child fulfilling what had been prophesied.”

I looked longingly at Danae saying “She is really beautiful. And what sumptuous roundness all over!”

Lima laughed and said “Next we go to Khajuraho. There, you see the temple. Look closely and you’ll see the carvings of statuary.”

I looked and saw many carvings of men and women indulging in group sex.

Lima said laughing “See that carving of a man and a woman enjoying sex. A white man who was a tourist said it couldn’t be done and bet $100. Then comes this yoga expert and wins the bet. He and his girlfriend performed the feat in the white man’s hotel room. Such is the power of yoga.”

I studied the carving for long and said “Yes. It would be difficult though I could try it with my 10 year discount.”

“Who would pair with you?”

“You for instance!  I appreciated you when we met and I had said I looked for a night’s fling with you. You had said sure. I hope you remember it.”

She nodded. She asked “Do you want to explore further?”

“No. Thus far is enough though I haven’t found my wife. I thank you for the guided tour and your explanations.  Above all I must thank you for making me 10 years younger.” I sighed and said “Of course that makes my wife much older than me. Alright let me have you.”

She laughed and said pointing “Let us go into that room where we won’t be disturbed.”

I jumped at it and said “I’m glad you’re fulfilling your promise.”

We entered the room but next moment Lima was missing. I shouted in panic “Lima where’re you?”

I looked around only to find I was in my bed, with my wife looking curiously at me. She asked “Who is Lima?”

I said “I was dreaming.” I saw it was past midnight.

“You were surely thinking of someone called Lima” She laughed and said “I don’t blame you. When I came home after class I saw you were fast asleep and had no heart to disturb you. The fault is mine: I’ve denied you several days making you long for me. Right now say open sesame and see the response!”

I reached for her. Now leave us in peace!

END

NOTE: With apologies to JURGEN by James Branch Cabbel!