Cabin of Healing

James neared the cabin, relieved that it was still intact after being absent for seven months.  The last time he was there, it was the middle of Summer. Everything was green, but now white. Last time he drove to the cabin, but this time he had to park a ways away, put on snowshoes, and make the journey.  Last time he made repairs to the place and prepared the place for a winter visit.

“I hope I stocked it well,” he thought as he trekked to the cabin.

His first visit to the cabin since he purchased it in the Spring last year.  First visit to a place to truly contemplate and heal. Last visit was used to prepare the cabin for this kind of visit.  Now, to put it to the test.

James came to the front door, unlocked it, and went inside.  There is a window next to the door, one to the left side, and one to the right side of the room.  The back of the room had no windows, but a fireplace in the middle of it.

“Everything looks intact,” he muttered as he glanced around at the small surroundings.

Large enough for a single bed, a couple of reclining chairs, an icebox, wood stove, dresser, and a small desk with a chair.

James went and lit a couple of candles, then to the fireplace to get a fire going to warm up the place, and himself.  A short time he succeeded in warming up the place and himself.

James stood in front of the fire staring at the flames for the longest period before he came out of his trance, and went over and sat on the bed.  He sat there for a few minutes, staring out the window at the falling snow. Then one by one tears started to fall from his eyes until he suddenly cried out, throwing his arms up into the air.  Then he buried his head into the pillow and let his sorrow loose. For so long he kept his emotions in check. Now, it was time to let it go in the silence. It was time for him to empty his soul at this little cabin.

“I miss you so much,” he cried out as he sat back up.

So many pictures of his loved ones flashed through his mind as he sat there not really looking at any thing with his blurry vision.  His vision had turned inward as he replayed the scenes with his family.

“I’m sure glad that is over,” he told his new bride, Kim, as they drove away from the reception.  “I was about to pass out in the suit it was so hot.”

“You didn’t,” she said with a smile.  “We made it, and now to start our new adventures.”

The two of them sat at the restaurant that night before flying out on their honeymoon, staring at each other.  So much love in their eyes. Both of them had waited so long to find their true love, and their dreams have now become a reality.  Days of losing hope were gone as they stared at each other.

“I love you,” he told her.  “Truly, undeniable love as I gaze upon your beautiful face.”

Many years have gone by since the day happened, but it was crystal clear in his mind.

For the next year the two of them did many things that in the past was with family, friends, or by themselves.  They now had a mate to enjoy the adventure. The romantic locations were now truly romantic. They could now cuddle.  They could now hold hands. They could now passionately kiss as they strolled along the river.

“So many enjoyable moments with just the two of us,” muttered James.  “The two of us before our bundle of joy came along to start our next adventures of fun and love.”

Being at the hospital by his wife’s side as she gave birth to Loretta.  He held his daughter with her beautiful red hair.

“I’m a dad,” he said in awe.

He wasn’t sure if that day would ever come.  He wasn’t sure if he was prepared to become a father.

“But here I am now a father,” he thought as he looked down at God’s creation.

God!  James stood up and went over to the window of the cabin.

“What does God have to do with my beautiful child?” he asked, banging his fist on the windowsill.  “You create life then you selflessly take it away from us.”

James went over and sat in one of the chairs, and started rocking.  He closed his eyes, trying to calm himself down. Frustration wouldn’t help his mental state.  He needed to release his emotions of bitterness, and clear his mind of such thoughts.

“Quit blaming ones who had nothing to do with your loss,” hsi mother told him.  “We live in a fallen world that was created by us. Due to our free will we all have to face the consequences.  Face death, heartache, pain, and sins of the world.”

James didn’t want to hear any of it.  He just wanted his loved ones back.

“If you are such a loving God bring my family back!” he screamed to the heavens.

 James knew he was being irrational to one that only wanted to give love.  To give comfort to the hurting.

James opened his eyes as he sat there.

“If only you can numb the pain in my heart,” he thought.

He remembered the day he took some time off his hectic schedule to go with his wife to take his beauty, Loretta, to her first day of school.  To watch as she sat at the little table and give her parents a beaming smile as mother took a picture then wiped the tear from her eye.

“You enjoy yourself and listen to your teacher,” James instructed her.  “Be good.”

He thought after those words how silly that was for his daughter is a sweetheart, doing little to disappoint him.  She was truly an angel from heaven.

“Now you are with the angels,” said James.

James went over to the desk, sat in the chair, and lit the candle by the corner.  He opened the binder to a blank page. He took the pen and held it for a moment as he looked at the piece of paper.

“Time to begin the healing,” whispered James.

Before he met his wife, James, wrote numerous short stories about all kinds of topics.  It depends upon what he had on his mind. Sometimes it was about a show he just watched or a story he just read.  There are times when his emotions ran high which he wrote whatever came to mind. It felt like his emotions leaked out of him onto the pages.

“I feel so much better,” he would say countless times once he was done.

James put ink to paper and started writing.  Time meant nothing as he wrote and wrote. He finally put the pen down when his hand started to hurt.  He looked out the window and saw that the sun had set, and darkness rapidly approaching. He looked over at the fireplace and saw that a couple of logs were needed.

“In this small place that should do for the day,” said James.  “I will find out as the day comes to a close.”

James went over to the chair with a book and read for the next few hours until it was time to call it a night.  First day in the cabin came to an end as James lay in his bed enjoying the utter silence.

The days went by with James writing, reading, or just enjoying the scenery and quiet.

It was a time of healing of the soul as he was able to grasp his life after the turmoil.  To step away from the high pace environment and constant noise to silence. To come to a complete stop and let the picture become focused.  To step back and see there is so much more to life even after tragedy.

“It’s not over,” he thought.

The day came when it was time to leave.  James closed up everything and left the cabin.

“See you in the Summer,” he said as he glanced at it one last time.

As he drove back to the city he had a smile.  It has been so long without a smile.